Hallucinations Are Never A Good Sign
by HeartyJessica
Summary: He thought he was going crazy. Heck they all thought he might be going crazy. But was he really? And if he was in fact hallucinating, why was it of that girl? Disclaimer: They're not mine.
1. It's Just the Beginning

It was supposed to be a normal day. Just like any other day - but it wasn't. His life was never normal.

But who wanted normal anymore, when you could have extraordinary. Adventurous, yet deadly. Who needed normal when you could have spontaneous?

Any other day and he would welcome adventurous, but today ... today needed to be normal. Because if it wasn't, then he was either going crazy or ... no, hallucinating is still borderline crazy. At least that's how Rodney had so clearly outlined it for him.

"_You're seeing things?" Rodney looked at him with a bit of concern splashed about his face. "What sort of things?" His emphasis clearly on things. _

"_I told you, I'm not sure. At first ... but it couldn't have been. She ... no." He glanced back toward the scientist who had become like a brother to him. Utter confusion was his basic expression. The look of 'you're crazy' was clearly what Rodney had to be thinking._

_"So what you mean is you're hallucinating." Both of his eyebrows choosing at that moment to rise in concern. _

"_Never mind."_

That's how he had left. Now he was standing back in that same room. Faced with the same problem.

What if Rodney was right? What if he was losing it? I'm mean, what did he think he would find coming back here? Carson had said that he wasn't getting enough rest. Maybe his sleep deprivation was finally getting to him.

"Excuse me," And there it was. He turned around only to be greeted by the young girl he had seen before. She looked like she was seventeen or eighteen. Which shocked him because there were no personnel on Atlantis that young. "What are you doing here? This is a restricted area."

"What am I doing here?" He should ask her the same thing. "What about you, like you said this is a restricted area? What are you, like seventeen?"

"Eighteen. And why I'm here is irrelevant. The more important question is why you're here. I told you earlier that this area was restricted to anyone outside of ... no." She stuttered. A look of confusion graced her face. "I shouldn't have to repeat myself. You heard me the first time."

She turned to leave, but he wasn't going to let her off that easily. Not again anyways. It was just over two hours ago that they had had this same conversation. The reason he had gone to Rodney. Now he knew he wasn't crazy. Because here she was again trying to elude him. Who was this girl?

"Now hold on just one minute." He reached for his radio to ask Elizabeth if she knew anything about this person. "Elizabeth, this is Sheppard."

"Yes, John?"

"I'm down at the north pier over by the science labs we haven't fully scanned yet. Is this section cleared at all?"

"I haven't authorized that, no. Why, what's going on?"

"There's a girl wondering around down here. Says I need to leave because this area's restricted."

"What?"

"That's what I said."

"She shouldn't even be down there. John, what's her name?"

He hadn't asked her that. "One sec let me ask ..." But she wasn't there anymore. He had looked down at the ground for one second and now she was gone. "Elizabeth, scan the area for life signs. I lost her."

* * *

Elizabeth rushed over to the control room. This didn't sound good. If Athosian children or expedition personnel were wondering around areas of the city that hadn't been explored yet ... well, who knows what could happen. 

"Rodney, scan the city for life signs. Specifically the north pier."

"Got it."

That was strange. John was the only one appearing in that section of the city. This incident only strengthened her concern for John.

She was beginning to worry about him. Rodney had mentioned to her earlier that Sheppard had gone off about how he thought he might be seeing things. Which wasn't a good sign from any stand point, but since John was her ranking military officer that served as a problem. She couldn't afford it if he started hallucinating out on the field. Someone could get hurt.

More importantly she was worried about him as a person- as someone she cared about as more than just her friend.

"John, you're the only one over there, which doesn't make any sense."

"What? No ... are you sure. She just ran off. Are there any transporters near by ... maybe she ..."

"No, the only one is back toward the center of the city. She couldn't have gotten that far. John ... did you get her name?"

He let out a deep sigh. "No." He let out a deep sigh. It was moments just like this that he was sure there was some huge conspiracy against him. Make Sheppard look crazy. He never should have been trusted with this position anyways. Yup. Had to be a conspiracy. "I'm heading back."

* * *

"What was that all about?" Rodney was a little confused. The conversation between Weir and Sheppard was a little weird. What girl? Oh no. That girl. His head dropped. That could only mean one thing.

* * *

His long walk back to her office gave him time to think about what had just happened. For the second time that day this mysterious girl had managed to disappear. To where he wasn't sure. She had just ... for lack of a better word. Vanished. 

He rounded the corner coming to a halt as he approached the archway right before the gate room. There gathered at the top of the stairs were three doctors that he didn't really want to talk to right now. Doctors Carson, McKay and Weir.

Back tracking he made his way toward his room. He definitely didn't need all three of them telling him how worried they were or looking at him the way Rodney had earlier. He just didn't want to deal with that right now. Especially since he had enough stuff to think about at the moment.

* * *

"Let him go," Rodney was just about to run after John when he saw him retrace his steps back toward the personnel living quarters. "Maybe he just needs some time." 

"But Elizabeth ..."

"Rodney leave it alone. We can't back him into a corner. You know how he is with situations like that. He'll deny it until we give up."

"Fine, but what if ..."

"He'll be fine." Elizabeth left both of the doctors standing quietly with looks of concern painted across their faces. An expression that seemed to be permanently residing there these past few days.

* * *

"Useless." 

"What?"

"That's how I feel. He helps me out all the time and I can't even ... I looked at him like he was insane, Carson! That's not what I should've done. I should have ..."

"Rodney, this isn't your fault. We've all been under a lot of stress as of late." He could tell that coming up with excuses wasn't helping Rodney any. "You're not useless, lad. None of us are."

Carson left shortly after he was called away to the infirmary. According to the nurse, someone had gotten fed up with Kavaghna's nagging and decided to silence him with their fist. Now Kavaghna was in the infirmary demanding that Carson give him something for the pain and then contact Dr. Weir so that something could be done about the lieutenant who had assaulted him.

Rodney laughed to himself. He could see it now. Elizabeth sitting in her office. The lieutenant who had hit Kavaghna standing as stiff as a board just inside the door. Then to his surprise Elizabeth gets up, a huge smile plastered to her face, and shakes the lieutenant's hand. 'Everyone wishes it had been their fist that had connected with his jaw. Well done. What did he do again that made you do that? His version was over exaggerated a little.'

Okay so maybe Elizabeth might not have said those words exactly, but John surely would have shaken the young man's hand.

Heck, he would've loved to be the one to have his fist connect with Kavaghna's face. It would have been a moment of glory.

But back to the reason he was standing where he was.

Carson was right. He wasn't useless. He was going to do something to help John. He just wasn't quite sure what that something was.

* * *

She was leaned up against the frame of his door. Her head tilted to the side. It was now or never. She hadn't walked down here to just stare at Atlantis's frame work. She had come to talk to him. Even though right now, all she wanted was to crawl back to her room defeated. It was hard for her to see him so upset. But this is what she needed to do – wanted to do. 

So she raised her hand and knocked. "John?"

No answer.

"John, can we talk?"

He really didn't want to talk right now, but since it was her he didn't really mind that much. She was the only person that was ever able to comfort him anyways.

"John, please. I just want ..."

The door swooshed open. "Hey."

"Hey."

"Are you ..."

"Elizabeth, please don' ask me if I'm okay." He walked back into his room, flopping onto his bed face down.

"I'm just worried." The door closed behind her. "I don't like seeing you like this."

"Like this?"

"Yes, like this." She said spreading her arms out to suggest his current state of woes me.

"I have a right." His voice muffled by the goose down sheets that he had shipped from Earth. It was a special request.

Who was he kidding? He won a bet. And someone was short a goose down blanket in the science department. Cough. Rodney.

"That's what you always say." It came out as a whine. The words escaped her lips before she could really think about what she was saying.

"I'm sorry. What did you say?" Playfully said of course.

She reddened. Aw crap. Nice choice of words for a diplomat. "Um ... nothing." Now she looked scared, but a good sort of scared as weird or bizarre as that sounded.

"Oh, really. Because I do believe you were insinuating that I complain a lot." He was now sitting up, staring into her autumn eyes.

"Insinuating. Wow, Colonel, I'm impressed. You learned a big word this week."

"Oh, is that what you think." She never even had a chance. No sooner had the words left his lips he reached out and grabbed her around the waist playfully. Tossing her onto the bed, he kneeled on top of her making it so she couldn't escape.

"John, think about what you're going to do for a minute."

"Oh, believe me I have." A devilish grin appeared on his face.

"John, please ... I'm begging you. You know how much I hate it when you ..."

"When I do this?"

And with that he commenced operation tickle Elizabeth.

So? What do you think? Should I continue? Do you want to know what is happening to John? Review and you'll get a present.


	2. Join the Club

Ronon and Teyla had been walking through the hallway when they heard it. A woman screaming. However, as soon as Ronon started to run toward the room that the screams were coming from Teyla firmly placed her hand on his shoulder. She apparently knew better.

"Listen ..."

* * *

"Ahhh! John ... please ... stop ... I can't take it ... ahhhh! Stop!" Mass giggling commenced there after. 

"Not until you take it back!"

"Take what back?" She decided to be coy. Bad choice. "Ahhhh! Okay, okay ... please!"

"What do you say?" His hands rose just slightly above her exposed ribs.

"I take it back." She was still trying to catch her breath from the attack.He was still kneeling over her. His legs firmly holding her down so that she couldn't inch her way out of this one.

"Take what back?" His right hand inched closer. "No, wait. Let me help you. Repeat after me. I, Elizabeth Weir ..." He paused waiting for her to follow suit.

"John?" She whined.

"Fine if you'd much rather play it the hard way we can just as easily do that." Tickling commenced again.

"No ... ahhh ... stop." Each word dragged on pausing ever so slightly in between burst of giggles. "I ... John stop ... I'm trying to ..."

* * *

He looked back at her. "Laughter?" 

"It is merely Colonel Sheppard and Dr. Weir." He still looked confused. "It is called tickling. They're fine."

"Right. What were we doing?"

"Sparring."

"Right."

This wasn't the first time that she had heard them doing this same thing. Tickling is what Laura had called it when she had asked her about it.

"_It's just tickling Teyla. Rodney's heard it too. Apparently he asked John about it and he just said it wasn't any of his business, but if it was he was just proving a point. Whatever that means. It's no big deal."_

"_I see. Tickling." She said as she went in search of Ronon. _

_

* * *

_

"What's that?" He raised his arms up careful not to let her escape.

"I, Elizabeth Weir ..."

"... Know and truly believe that John Sheppard is ..."

"... know and truly believe that John Sheppard is ..."

"... completely sane ..."

"John, I never ..."

"... completely sane and knows many big words that have yet to come out of his mouth."

"That's what you want me to say? It's not exactly ..."

He lowered his hands down ever so slightly before she repeated what he said.

"... completely sane and knows many big words that have yet to come out of his mouth."

"Good," He rolled off of her. "Now that wasn't so hard now was it?" He loved their moments. Especially these ones. They made him feel important again. As stupid as that sounded. He knew he was important to Atlantis – to the expedition – but these moments made him feel important to her.

He grabbed her wrist and pulled her to him. She was leaning into his chest now.

"Don't get mad?"

"About what?"

"John, are you sure that ..."

"I'm fine. It doesn't matter anymore. I saw something and ... well. Let's just leave it at that."

"You sure?"

"Yeah."

But he wasn't sure. He wanted to know who that girl was. He wanted to prove that he wasn't losing it. He knew that Elizabeth thought it was probably just stress, but he knew it wasn't. He had seen her and that was that.

* * *

He wanted to help him. Why else would be have brought his work here. He could have stayed in the comfort of his lab where there were swivel chairs with cushions. Point being, he didn't have to be here. Sitting on the hard, cold Atlantean floor like he was back in kindergarten. With his work sprawled out on the floor before him. 

However, as much as he hated sitting Indian style crouched over without his coffee those inconveniences appeared small in comparison to the problem at hand. John need help and he was going to be there for him. Just like John had been there when he ... no he wouldn't go there. No matter how many times Sheppard saved his life he wasn't going to actually admit it. That would be ... well out of character for him. He was after all Rodney McKay, astrophysicist. Brilliant scientist. Accomplished ...

"You're doing that wrong."

"Holy ..." He jumped about four feet. The calculations he had been working on now flying back towards the inevitable destination – the ground – after being flung into the air. "Jeez ... don't you know you're not supposed to sneak up on people like that. You almost gave me a heart attack! And then what! This expedition would be without the only person in all Atlantis that can save them from their own stupidity." He started to gather up his scattered notes. "Well?" Obviously waiting for an apology.

"As I said before: You're doing that wrong. Carry the two and then divide by your coefficient."

"Excuse me? I highly doubt that you could possibly understand ..." Huh, would you look at that. She was right. "Where did you ..."

But she was gone.

"Where did she ..." He pointed in every which direction. Maybe John was right. And if in fact he was, they had a serious problem on their hands. Because not only was there a girl running around Atlantis, but no one could seem to keep her around long enough to find out who she was. More importantly what she was doing here.

* * *

He was walking back toward that room. After the sound of Carson's voice came through Elizabeth's earpiece, they had been woken to reality. The reality that he still had people looking at him funny mostly because NO one believed him. Anyways, now he was walking back. He had to figure out a game plan. Prove to everyone, including himself, that he wasn't crazy. 

That's when they collided. John hadn't been watching his feet step one after the other instead of watching where he was going and Rodney ... well he was too busy contemplating what had just happened. He had been out smarted by a girl. A girl who only appeared to eighteen, if that.

"Come on Rodney ..."

"Sheppard ... just the person I was looking for. If you ..."

"Not now Rodney. If you haven't noticed, I'm not exactly in the mood to test anything at the moment. If you want someone with the ancient gene go find Carson."

"No, no. This has nothing to do with that. What did you say that girl looked like?"

"Rodney, enough's enough! I know that you all think I'm going nuts, but could you lay off with all the questions."

"No, I'm serious. What'd you say she looked like?"

"I didn't." He kept walking.

"Well?"

"What!"

"Could you elaborate a little?"

"Why?"

"Because I need to know!"

"Fine. If you need to know! She had long brown hair. Loose curls. Hung about her face a little. A little arrogant. Thought she knew everything. She looked like a scien ..."

"...Scientist with a white shirt that sort of buttoned up the front. Long white pants to match and a blue ..."

" ... locket hung from her neck. Some sort of blue crystal. How did you ..."

"I met her ... your invisible girl. She went on and on about how I was wrong. Big whoop. So I forgot to divide by the coefficient and carry over the two. Can't blame me. I didn't have my coffee and Zelenka ..."

"Rodney! Get on with it!"

"Oh right. I don't think your hallucinations are hallucinations. That or I'm just as crazy."

So I couldn't wait for you to all review. I had to post this once the idea came into my head. More to come I hope. Just don't get to attached. I leave in about a week for Honduras on a missions trip. I'll be back though. So basically I'm going to try and wrap this up in a week. Let's see if I can do it. Oh and don't forget to review. Is there anything you want to see happen? Review! Please.


	3. What Was Her Name Again?

"So what you're really trying to say is I was right and you were wrong."

"Yes." Then he realized what he had just done. "Wait ... no. No. I just ... it was a matter of ..."

"Rodney?" It wasn't really a question and Rodney knew that. It was more of a 'just admit it.' John's voice was stern yet humorous.

"Fine! But don't go telling anyone. That last thing I need is for everyone to start second guessing me because you were right and I was ..." He couldn't even say it.

"Wrong."

"Precisely." Now all they needed to do was figure out what was going on and then convince everyone else that John had indeed seen something. A girl? An ancient? Who knew what she was. Worst case scenario, she was a figment of their imaginations.

Rodney could just see this turning into psychoanalysis of John's and his own mental state. Kate would get a kick out of this. So would Laura actually. I mean if she even thought that he might be on the verge of having a break down ... well he didn't even want to think about it.

"So, where were you going just now?"

"Where do you think?" He wasn't really in the mood for small talk; it wasn't that he didn't like Rodney, just the opposite really. He said he was like a brother and he was. But right now, he just wanted to know what was going on. However, since Rodney was the only one who believed him so far – he was still unsure what Elizabeth thought – he was willing to indulge in the pleasantries. "Want to come?"

"What do you think you'll find?" In the back of his mind John was hoping that she would be there again. And if she was he wasn't going to waste time trying to figure out where she came from. He was going to try and get her to stay.

He looked at Rodney and just shook his head. He wasn't sure where this was going but he needed to know that he wasn't crazy. He needed to feel trusted again.

"Come on. I think I have an idea." Rodney ushered John with his right arm. Time to figure out what's going on.

"That makes one of us."

* * *

She had just gotten out of a meeting with Carson. A meeting that she had a hard time concentrating in. And Carson could tell. After he had asked her if she had heard him for the fifth time he told her to go find the Colonel. Clearly her mind was on John and John alone.

He had reassured her that everything was okay. Using his famous words, 'I'm fine.' But she knew better. He wasn't fine.

She was partly to blame. Only she wished that she hadn't been. She could hear the disappointment in his voice when he said he was heading back. She had done something that she had sworn she wouldn't. Which was doubt him.

She knew exactly how much that affected him. As her second in command and the one man that she knew would risk his life for her own, he thrived off of protecting the people of Atlantis. Thrived off of protecting her. It was his passion, his drive. If he couldn't protect them, if they didn't trust him he lost that. She knew that he silently died inside every time one of his team members was hurt off world.

And as much as she tried to tell him it wasn't his fault, he still blamed himself. Because somehow he felt that he had failed. Failed at protecting, failed at doing the one job that meant something to him. And why? Because it was always more than just a job. He was protecting his family. Elizabeth was his family. The people of Atlantis were his family. He couldn't fail at protecting his family.

And he hadn't. But again she needed to remind him of that. Something that she would keep doing as long as she could.

At the moment that meant she needed to find him, considering she had just spent the last five minutes knocking on his door without an answer.

She pressed her hand to her earpiece. "John? Are you there?" No answer.

"Rodney?" No answer. "Rodney are you ..."

" Elizabeth?"

"Rodney, have you heard from Colonel Sheppard?"

"Actually he's right here. Did you need something?"

"Yes, can you tell him to meet me in my office."

Next John piped in. "Actually, Elizabeth I'm kind of preoccupied at the moment, but ..." She could faintly hear John and Rodney arguing over something, trying to muffle their voices so that she couldn't hear what they were saying.

"She could help and ..."

"Is she going to believe ..."

"You never know until ..."

"You know what, fine! But if she doesn't ..."

" Elizabeth are you still there?"

"Yes."

"Can you actually come down here?"

"That's fine ..." She waited for a response, but there was none. "John?"

"Yeah?"

"Where's 'down here'?"

"Oh, right. We're at the north pier over by ..."

"The science labs? John what are ..."

Now it was Rodney's turn to interrupt. " Elizabeth just come down here. There's something you need to see."

"Alright. I'm on my way."

* * *

"So? What are you going to tell her when she gets here?" They both looked over at the not so invisible girl that they had been talking to for the last couple of hours. What were they going to tell Elizabeth? Hey, we just thought you should know John's not crazy. In fact, that girl he was seeing, yeah, she's real. Real in the sense that she's a hologram of someone who's real. In fact, she's here somewhere, but we're not sure where. We haven't exactly gotten that far. Still need to ask where she came from. Basically the questions have been who are you? What are you intentions? How do we know you're not just a figment of our imaginations, because you keep disappearing on us and that's not good for the whole convincing thing? Oh, and what's your name?

"Not a clue. But we'll be sure to fill you in as we go."

"Oh, and Gwen?" She was only slightly paying attention to him. The majority of her attention was on the man messing with the control panel to her left. "Maybe, you shouldn't mention anything about what you and I talked about while Rodney went to get a life signs detector."

"I understand. Stop touching that." Rodney looked up.

"Wait? What did you two talk about?"

Yet another chapter with a mild cliffy. You all know the drill. My favorite thing in the whole world is reviews. So ... review. I want to know what you think about this story or chapter or whatever so far. Again, suggestions are greatly appreciated. What do you think will happen next? 


	4. More Than They Bargained For

_Two hours earlier that same day_

"Okay so what's the plan again?" Rodney couldn't believe this man. This was the fourth time he had to explain himself. How much clearer did he have to be?

"What part of 'we're going to wait it out' do you not understand!" John raised his arms to say back off a little.

"Sorry. It's just ... well, you're Rodney."

"You're point being what exactly?"

"You're Rodney McKay. Last I recall he executed full-proof plans. What is it he always says ... oh yeah?" He mimics Rodney by raising his right hand and pointing his index finger into the air. "'In my expert opinion, if we ...' Blah, blah, blah. Where's that guy? Bring him back. I want his take on this whole thing." John pushed passed him a little as if he were actually going to find this alleged McKay.

"Ha, ha, ha, yeah that's right. Laugh at the only man who believes your story. Better yet, laugh at the only person who knows what's going on. Please do. Then we'll see if I still decide that this menial problem is worth my efforts."

"You saw her too! If you push it aside to do something else not only will I be screwed, but so will you!" Then the second thing that Rodney had said clicked. "You know what's going on? Now that's the McKay I know."

"Well, actually ..."

"You don't know what's going on."

"No, but ..."

"Then I take it back."

"Well, what was I suppose to do! Just stand here while you degrade me. I'm not some schmuck that you can verbally abuse while I'm only trying to help. Beside ..."

"Schmuck?" Flashing one of his famous grins.

"Don't laugh!" Right. Don't laugh at the astrophysicist who just said schmuck. A word that John wasn't expecting to come out of the mouth of Rodney McKay. How could he not continue to laugh? "John, it's really not that funny. Stop!"

"Stop whining. If you weren't so busy whining you would have noticed you're stupid plan worked."

"It's not stupid and that ... wait. It did? What plan?"

He raised his eyebrows and pointed to look behind him while at the same time mouthing something that Rodney swore resembled. 'I'm sorry, he does this sometimes.'

"I'm tired of asking you to both leave. Please. I don't have time to spare, especially if it's to be spent listening to the two of you arguing. My father would not be happy if he knew that not only did I sneak off, but that the majority of my time which should have been spent saving this city was in fact spent listening to the both of you. Now please. Go, you should be packing. And you ..." She said clearly talking to Rodney.

"Me?" He looked a little shocked and a little afraid all at he same time. He glanced around. It was him or John. And he was really hoping it was John. He felt like he was becoming smaller and smaller by the minute.

"Of course. Who did you think I was referring to? Never mind. Did you fix your calculations? I don't mean to intrude, but you were obviously working on the city's main drive. Which is confusing because Janus already touched base on that. We can transport as soon as the others come back. So you can stop doing whatever it is that you were prior engaged with and work on something of a more immediate need."

Oh my gosh. Who the hell was this girl? John wasn't sure what she was talking about, but clearly she was insane. Beside the fact that she was talking a mile a minute so half of what she said wasn't even comprehendible. Jeez, and he thought he was crazy.

At the moment, he was just happy he wasn't getting as much attention as Rodney. She had just gone on and on. The worst part is he didn't even know what she was talking about. Like he said: Thank God it wasn't him that she was talking to.

But at that moment he was almost sure that he was going to regret that thought. Because she was not only staring at him, but she was looking at him like she had just been looking at Rodney. Like she had been insulted or worse, slapped in the face.

"Don't think that just because I didn't start with you, doesn't mean I'm not going to get to you. You're just as bad as he is. The first time, I asked you to tell me who you were. The second, I told you to leave because this was a restricted area. Now you're back a third time with your friend here. And if anyone is crazy it's the two of you because you're standing there looking at me like I'm nuts, when in fact you should be in your quarters gathering whatever possessions you have left. Thus proceeding to make arrangements for them to be shipped to the nearest outpost. I don't think I should have to remind you that we're in the middle of a war that we are drastically losing." By now she looked out of breath and tired and confused as to why they were still standing before her.

"What!" They both said simultaneously.

* * *

Rodney never even heard John say half of what she just accused him of.

* * *

Maybe this is what McKay would sound like on crack. Or overloaded on caffeine. The first sounded funnier.

* * *

"Gentlemen. Please. I'm tired. I'm trying to save this city the only way that I know how. I'm trying to save you. I don't mean to come off as angry. I'm just frustrated beyond words. Please go. The Wraith are nearly at our doorstep and all you can do is ask me 'what.'"

"I'm sorry..." He didn't want to upset her anymore than they already had but he needed to make something clear. "Let me get this straight. The Wraith are attacking. It's an all out war. And we need to pack?"

She let out a deep sigh. Her shoulders dropping a little like she was carrying a huge burden. "Yes." Now she really looked exhausted.

"But the Wraith aren't here. We would have picked that up on the long range sensors."

"No, they are very much here. The long range sensors did in fact pick them up months ago. We've been at war with them for ages. There numbers are far greater and we're losing. Can I get any clearer?" She sat down now.

"Hey, are you okay?" John was a little worried. This was the longest they had ever talked to her and for lack of a better phrase she didn't look so hot.

"I'm fine just tired. As I said before."

"Maybe we should take you to see Carson."

"I'm not sure who Carson is, but I assure you that Janus will help."

"You're kidding right? The ancient scientist that the other Elizabeth told us about? The one from like thousands of years ago."

" Elizabeth ... " A quizzical expression appeared on her face. "Oh ... you're talking about that woman who arrived just a few hours ago. The one who found her way to Janus's time machine. And I assure you Janus is very much alive. I just saw him this morning. I don't know why you think he doesn't exist yet. And what does this Elizabeth have to do with anything?"

"She runs this expedition! John I really think we should take her to Carson." Now Rodney was worried. Clearly this girl was having some sort of breakdown. She was completely unaware of at least two key senior staff members.

"I'm starting to agree with you." But as they moved closer she stood up abruptly.

"No. I'm fine. It's you that are misunderstood I assure you."

"Okay listen. We just want to help you." Wow, those words didn't sound ironic coming out of his mouth. I mean barely two hours ago everyone had been saying that to him. "I'm Colonel John Sheppard. This here is Doctor Rodney McKay. Just like you, we came from Earth just two and a half years ago. We're all in the same boat here. Now come with us and everything's going to be fine."

But a few sentences ago he had lost her. One word had literally hit her so hard that she didn't even know she was holding her breath in until she gasped for air.

Earth. They had come from Earth.

"What year is it?" She looked into their eyes pleadingly.

"2006. Why?" Memory lose. Amnesia. He was throwing out all the possible, logical explanations. But he should have known that this was Atlantis. Logical was thrown out the window a long time ago.

"Oh my god." And then she flickered. No, that wasn't right was it. She didn't just flicker. That would mean. She was a hologram. "Rodney quick go to your left. Do you see the control panel there?"

"Yes."

"Press the red button near the top right corner."

"I thought you weren't supposed to press the red buttons!"

"Just press it Rodney!"

So he did and what he and John saw next ... well let's just say they weren't expecting it.

Okay so another chapter down. I don't know how many to go. Please keep up with the reviews. You're all encouraging me to write and update faster. Oh and I'm looking for a beta reader so yeah. If anyone has any suggestions or wants to help themselves then please let me know. I'm still new at this whole fanfic thing so I'm not really sure what being a beta consists of but I just need help and stuff. So. With that said, please enjoy. Oh and review. What do you want to see happen? What do you think John and Rodney see? Review and maybe you'll find out. Thanks! 


	5. Are We Ready?

They couldn't believe they hadn't seen it before. Rodney traced his fingers along the glassy surface. It was flush with the wall. He should have known. His hand was still pressed up against the cool glass.

"Rodney, have you ever deactivating one of these?" She was now standing behind the both of them. "If you haven't it's very simple, you don't have ..."

"No ... I've had some experience. But ... why aren't ..." His voice was solemn. This wasn't exactly what he was expecting when he and John had set out to prove their sanity.

"... Why aren't you old?"

She looked over at John, with confusion and hurt reflecting in her eyes. "What do you mean? I told you I was eighteen. Were you expecting someone your age?"

"No, but ... why aren't you old looking?" As if restating what he initially said would somehow be enough to explain.

"I think what he means to say is why hasn't your body aged with time. Why don't you look like Elizabeth did, or the other Elizabeth that is?"

"I still don't understand what you mean?"

"You look no older than eighteen. You look just as you did over a thousand years ago!"

"Rodney, your point being what exactly?" It wasn't a question. It was a statement like why shouldn't I look the age that I am.

"When we found the other Elizabeth's body, she had aged with time. She was in stasis, but she aged. Now here we are again, with the same machine, only you haven't aged. And to top it all off you're standing there and you're over there." He said pointing to the glass chamber behind him. Within it was a young girl no older than eighteen. With long flowing brunette hair. It fell just below her chest. A blue crystal locket hung from her neck. Only now she wasn't in the white scientist attire. She was clothed in a graceful gown that curled up on the ground by her feet. For a moment Rodney couldn't help but think how beautiful she looked. I mean, for being eighteen. And it was that moment that he felt like he needed to protect her. Like she was his younger sister. "What John means is, why has this chamber preserved your form as it was thousands of years ago, when it did the exact opposite with Elizabeth? The other Elizabeth."

"Oh, you're talking about the ... Janus. Am I right? He put her there." When she saw them nod their heads in acknowledgement she continued. "Those rooms, that area, it's different. This one is used for the ... I guess ... what did you say Elizabeth was to you? To this expedition?"

"She runs the place." That was the first time he had spoken up in awhile. "She's the leader."

"Well then ... you could say that my father did what she is doing now. He was the leader of our people. Well, one of many at least. We have ... or I guess I should say had a council of men and sometimes women who would decide the fate of our people and this marvelous city. My father has a lot of pull up there and since I'm his kin I have pull in other minor things. Such as access to this area that you are now standing in. I believe that you Rodney would be very interested as to what this room operates. That chamber that you have so called it is only one of many technological advances for Atlantis."

"Yeah, but you said that this room was a restricted area. If that's the case then why are you down here?"

"John, if you were told by your father or in your case by Elizabeth to pack up and leave this city would you?" When she received no reply she then proceeded. "This city was going to be taken. I couldn't just abandon it. It's my home. I was going to do everything in my power to protect it. To preserve it. Janus played a small part, but he never knew my true intentions. If my father had known ... if any of them had known. This city might not have ..." But she couldn't finish that thought. The city had survived. She had survived and to be honest this life – this option – was better than a life that would be lived under the rule of her father. With the ancients, she wasn't allowed to voice her opinions, help the villagers, or meddle – that's what Janus had told her. He had been the only person that let her explore her curiosities. "I had to tell you this was a restricted area to make you think that you were in the wrong. Remember I still thought I was experiencing that day. The day I submerged the city. The day the Atlanteans evacuated. I thought you were personnel that had wondered off. I was trying to redirect you without causing you to be suspicion of me."

"Right, so ... wait. You know my name and I told you Rodney's, but what's yours?"

She smiled at him slightly embarrassed. She had been so busy explaining to them what had happened that she forgot her manners. "I'm sorry. John, Rodney ... my name is Gwen."

"Gwen ... you know I once knew this girl in high school. She was quite the catch obviously I was the ... oh her name was Gwen by the way. Anyways she was my ..."

"Rodney! Not that your high school love life isn't on my top things to find out before I die and all, but don't you think we have more pressing matters at the moment."

"Oh, right. Sorry, just a trip down memory lane. Gwen ... yes, um, do you know if there are any more of these chambers in Atlantis? Preferably ones that are occupied."

I guess there quite possibly could be. But I don't ... this room was the only one that I remember having them. Then again I didn't exactly know the location of every stasis chamber."

"McKay could you pick up this stuff up on a life signs detector?"

"I'll be right back." And with that Rodney ran out through the door without another word.

"John, I've been meaning to ask you ... when you came here the first time you were mumbling something. And well, I don't mean to pry, but why is it so hard?"

What? What was she talking about. Why was what so hard ... wait. Oh ... "You mean the relationship thing? You overheard me talking about that?"

She nodded her head in affirmation.

"Nice." He looked down in embarrassment. He hadn't meant for anyone else to over hear that. He had just come back from talking to Elizabeth. And, well, you could say he had a lot to think about. "It's just complicated. We ... she's ..."

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. I sort of already have a feeling I know what's wrong."

"How would you know that?"

"John ... think about it. My father's ancient. My mother's ancient. One plus two ..."

"Equals three. You can read my thoughts can't you. Never mind. I already know the answer to that. I really don't know what to say." He ran his hand through his bed head. "I ... she knows. It's more than just a little complicated. Basically, she's the leader and I'm her commanding officer."

"I see. But you both ..."

"Yes. It's hard to ..."

"I got it! This should work if there are any within this area, but we can expand the search if we don't find anything." John always said Rodney had great timing.

Then they heard Elizabeth calling them over the radios.

_Back to present time_

"John I thought we talked about this ..." But what she was going to say would have had no pertinence what so ever because standing just beyond John was the cause of all this confusion. "John who is that?"

"Elizabeth, this is Gwen. Gwen this is Elizabeth." Gwen smiled at the woman standing before her. So this was Elizabeth she who had caused so much trouble with the Atlantean Council. Elizabeth smiled back wearily. She still wasn't sure what was going on.

"Would someone please like to explain to me what's going on?"

"Elizabeth this is Gwen. She's that figment of my imagination that I've been talking about all day."

"Oh."

"Yup."

She walked towards Gwen reaching out to shake her hand welcoming her.

"You won't be able to do that." John pointed at her out stretched hand. "She's just a hologram. Her body's just over there."

"Thanks John." Gwen glared at him. "I'm actually the manifestation of thoughts. My memories. Me. It was a program made so that the being placed in the stasis chamber could tell someone from the outside how to reconfigure the controls so that the machine would ..."

"She means a person on the outside can turn this thing off."

"I was getting to that."

"Not fast enough."

"Wow, it looks like you've all been busy. John, I'm sorry that I ever doubted ..."

"No need. He already knows how you feel about this whole situation." John gave her an evil glare.

"Oh he does, does he. So, Rodney. Have you figured out how to turn this thing off?"

"We were actually hoping you'd get Carson to come down here. You know, for precaution's sake. In case she doesn't adapt right away. After all being in stasis for I thousands of years without functioning on your own has to have some side effects, if any."

"I think I can do that."

""I told them it was fine. I might not come to right away, but the process should only take a few minutes."

"We've heard that before and it never goes as planned."

"Fine."

"Carson, this is Weir."

"Yes, Elizabeth?"

"Can you come down to the north pier please. We're out by the science labs. And you might want to bring a nurse with you."

"Is everything alright? Did John do anything stup ..."

"Oh, come on Carson, I was never that far gone!"

"Right. I'm heading your way lass."

So now it was just a matter of minutes before they woke Gwen up in a sense. Knowing that she hadn't technically been alive for thousands of years really worried Rodney. There were so many things that could go wrong. So many things they had yet to think of. All they could hope was that everything would go smoothly.

This was a really hard chapter to write. I'm not sure whether or not it was good. I don't really like it. Hopefully you did. Let me know what you think. Constructive critisizm is greatly appreciated. Any ideas? Review please. That means you. Yeah, I'm talking to you. The person sitting there in there too busy reading this fanfic to get up and do anything else. At least that's what I'm doing. So click that button below and make a girl happy.


	6. Stop Pacing

When Carson walked into the room, it was his turn to stand back and stare bewildered at the four people in front of him. One of which he had never seen before.

The past few hours had been quite eventful considering this was Atlantis. It was normal for him to see John come into the infirmary either limping, hobbling, or in fact being carried in on a stretcher. It was not however, normal for there to be multiple rumors going around about the mental state of the Colonel. Sure there were those few rumors, even pools, about the Colonel and their leader, but that was a different matter all together. This was concerning the emotional state, the sanity of a key senior staff member. Carson had just gotten out of a meeting – if you could even call it that because the other person involved wasn't even paying attention to him – that was focused around his concern for the lack of sleep that many of the personal had been experiencing. Colonel Sheppard included. That was the only logical reasoning he had behind the hallucinations that John had been having.

But now that he was here, all of his prior assumptions and speculations were a toss up.

"Would someone please like to explain to me why I needed to be brought all the bloody way down here when none of ye seem to be in absolute dire need of medical assistance. Not that I don't enjoy your company luv, but that was a rather far walk. One of the medical staff just made a small break through on the retrovirus. I would like to get back as soon as possible."

"Trust me Carson, this will be well worth your time. Plus you're not the only one giving up valuable time here. I'm sure Radek is running around frantically wondering where I am. They're falling apart down there."

"Of course they are McKay." He looked at his partner in crime. "I'm sure Radek will survive without your expert opinion for a few more hours or so. Unless, of course, he needs someone else to go test a jumper out over the open ocean."

All Rodney did was glare at John. Nothing more could be said even if he had wanted to say it anyways because just as he was about to retaliate Elizabeth cut in.

"If you boys are done, I'm sure Gwen here is dying to wake up completely." She then turned her attention back to the young adult in front of her. "Gwen ..."

"Thank you Elizabeth. Now Rodney all you have to do is turn that dial over there ..." He walked over to the control panel and pointed. "Yes, that one. Turn it to the left thirty degrees. Okay, now John ..." He looked up. "Go over to the other side of the room. There's a power crystal ... yes. Pull it out and give it to Rodney. The lights might dim a little, but other than that nothing should happen." Sure enough the room was only slightly a glow now. "Now Rodney transfer that crystal to the port to your right. After that you should just be able to turn the dial another forty-five degrees to the left and then press that red button again. Yeah, that red button."

Rodney hated red buttons. He knew it was a menial thing, but why couldn't it be like blue or something. Red always meant something horrible. Red flashing lights: warning. Red flashing lights on fences: danger. Red button on Men in Black car: don't ever press that button. But if a red button was all he had to deal with and not a catastrophic explosion or whatever, then fine. He could handle one more red button. With that thought he slowly reached out to press it.

"Come on Rodney! Could you go any slower! Just press the button."

"Hey, if for some reason this triggers something other than her revival, then you'll be thanking for being hesitant now won't you."

"What! For prolonging my death. If that's what's going to happen in case there's a fail safe!"

"Gentlemen! There is no fail safe. It's fine. Rodney just press the ..." But before she could finish he pressed the button and she disappeared.

Luckily John was standing next to the chamber at that moment because just as Gwen seemed to have disappeared the glass front slide open. And with nothing supporting Gwen's body, she fell limply forward into John's open arms.

Her loose curls fell about her face. John gently pushed them back behind her left ear. " Carson, I think this is where you come in."

"Right, lay her up her on this table." After John easily lifted her up onto the flat surface, he stepped back and silently eased his way over to Elizabeth. Once he was by her side she uncrossed her arms and discretely reached out her right hand out to him. Knowing what she really needed he stepped behind her and wrapped his arms around her.

"Do you think she'll be alright?"

"I'm sure everything's fine. She's in good hands, remember. Plus, she said that this would go smoothly."

"John ..."

"Yeah, I know, nothing ever goes smoothly with us."

"No, correction, nothing ever goes smoothly when you're involved. But I'm sure you're right."

"Of course I am. When am I ever wrong?" But when he looked down into her glistening eyes he already knew what her intelligent, Atlantean leader mind was thinking. "Never mind, scratch that." She laughed out loud at that grabbing the attention of one frantic scientist.

"I'm glad you can laugh at a time like this. If you haven't noticed she still hasn't gained consciousness yet."

"Rodney, relax. She is breathing on her own. Her body has been in stasis for some time now. It will take her some getting used to the adjustment. For heaven sake lad, calm down. And stop pacing back and forth. Ye'll wear a hole in the ground."

He finally sat down, however instead of pacing he immediately started picking at his cuticles. He needed something to preoccupy his time with.

"John, I just wanted you to know that I am sorry. I never should have doubted you. I should have known that I had nothing to worry about."

" Elizabeth, I told you there's no need for apologizes. Beside, everything worked out. She's not a figment of my imagination which means I'm not crazy. No harm, no foul."

"Right ... but I still feel horrible for even thinking that ..." Then he leaned in closed, tightened his embrace and whispered in her ear unbeknownst to everyone else in the room.

"If it's really bothering you that much then you can apologize once and for all by making it up to me later."

"Oh really. And pray tell Colonel. How do I do that?"

"Simple: take a break from paper work and go out with me tomorrow."

As tempting as that sounded she had taken a break today to help him. She was already behind on paper work. She didn't really want to be even farther behind.

"John ... I'd love to. You know I would, but ..."

"Good. Then it' settled. Tomorrow I'll pick you up at eight." Just then they both heard a gasp come over from where Carson was standing.

So what did you think? Thanks to those who have reviewed. You have been encouraging me to continue. Keep it up! Tell me if I'm losing you with this story plot. I hope I'm not. Review Please!


	7. What Happened?

It was weirder than she thought it would be. Almost like she was watching them in slow motion. Rodney had pressed that button before she could finish speaking. John had thankfully been there to catch her as she fell unconsciously to the hard floor. Carson rushed over to that girl on the table. Who looked rather familiar from this stand point.

She traced the features of the young person lying haphazardly across the cool, metal table top. She seemed familiar. A little too much for her liking. It was almost unsettling. She wanted to get closer; it was harder to see from here now.

As she moved silently across the room, she caught a glimpse of a couple that reminder her of someone else that she knew. Two people that Janus had told her about. Or at least two people that looked like them.

It was only a rumor. Something that one of the scientists had started. And just like any other rumor she wasn't sure she should believe it. But finally her curiosity got the better of her. She asked the only person she thought she could depend on to tell her the truth. But the truth wasn't what she wanted to hear. But then again, she had never really trusted her ... could she call him that now. Her father. He wasn't even that anymore.

And where was Janus. Where was he? He was going to meet her here before they evacuated. He was going to help her save the city, but instead of his presence, she was here with these people. People that she had never even seen before. And why weren't any of them paying attention to her. It was like they couldn't even see her.

She looked away from the familiar couple and back toward the man with the funny accent. One that had never graced her ears before. She noticed for the first time that the girl he was standing over was wearing a soft blue dress. It reminded her of a present she once received from he so called father. Then she saw it. A crystal locket. "That's mine! But then ... that's me!" Her face went white and that was all that she knew of this stage in between.

* * *

That's when she jolted awake gasping for air only to be bombarded by bright lights that immediately dimmed to accommodate her adjusting pupils. Her head was screaming headache, but other than that she was fine. Or as fine as one could be after being in stasis for that long.

"You scared us for a minute there lass."

"Don't you mean she scared Rodney?"

"Oh, come on! You were just as worried!"

"Thanks Colonel, you make me feel much appreciated." Her sarcastic undertone creeping to the surface. These people huddled around her were making her nervous. She told them she would be fine. No harm, no foul. It wasn't like someone was going to die.

She went to push herself off of the table. She needed to get up and walk around. Stretch a little.

"And what do you exactly think you are doing luv?"

"Walking, what does it look like?" He smiled. She reminded him of another patient he knew. A patient he wasn't exactly fond of having in the infirmary all the time.

"Yes, well, there'll be plenty of time for ye to do that, but for now ..." He turned to Colonel Sheppard. "You'll be carried straight to the infirmary so that I can take a few blood samples and get ye all checked out."

* * *

John could tell that this was not going to be very pleasant. By the look on Gwen's face, he knew she probably hated the infirmary as much as he did. "It's alright Gwen. He doesn't bite much. I swear." He walked over and scooped her up into his arms.

"You don't sound very convincing ..." When he didn't reply she reassured him. "Don't worry, I'll be fine just as long as he uses the scanner and doesn't resort to aged tools."

"Sure, I'll make sure you get the small needle instead of the big one."

"Are you crazy! I asked for the scanner, not a needle!"

"A what?"

"A scanner. Easier, more efficient way of taking blood samples, taking x-rays, curing diseases, stuff that saves lives. The latest in Atlantean tech."

"Gwen, I think we would all greatly appreciate it if you showed us this device." Elizabeth glanced over at Rodney. She didn't even need him to say otherwise. She knew what he was thinking. And she wouldn't be surprised if John was thinking the same. No more needles.

"Of course, but I can't believe you haven't found it yet. I'm it usually appears as you walk into the room."

"Yes, but you're forget one small detail lass. Not all of us possess the ancient gene ..."

"And those few who do have limited accessibility to what they can and cannot operate. For instance, Sheppard here can pretty much do whatever his heart's content. Puddle jumpers, lights, doors, lucky bas ..."

"Rodney, I think that she gets the point. Basically, there aren't enough personnel in Atlantis who possess a strong enough gene. Many have undergone Carson's gene therapy, but even still. We're making progress."

"I see, and this gene therapy. You've manipulated your DNA in order to possess the ancient gene."

"That pretty much sums it up. Yes."

"I don't mean to butt in, but if you're all done discussing Carson's medical break through, I'd appreciate it if we could just show Gwen the way to the infirmary." John shifted his weight so that he could balance his weight and that of Gwen's. "Not that I don't love chatting, but if we're going to keep it up, I'd like to know so I can set Gwen here down. You're not heavy by any means, but I think that ..."

"Having a little trouble there Colonel." He glared at her in a 'you'll pay for that little remark later' sort of way. " Elizabeth, what happened to the diplomat that we all love and know?"

"She's on break."

"Right. Well, shall we go?"

"Yes, Carson. Gentlemen."

* * *

As they arrived to the entrance to the infirmary, she couldn't help but think about her discussion with her lost friend. How much of what he had told had been true? Deep down she wanted to believe every word. I mean it made sense considering. But would the man who had called himself her father her whole life really keep something like that a secret for so long. Then again, it would explain his hostility toward the new comer.

It hadn't been her fault. It had in fact been Janus's. If he hadn't built that time traveling ... the point was: they could have sent her back. Her father could have pulled some strings. But instead he chose to be hard-hearted and left the women from the future helpless. She felt sorry for her. In a way. She wasn't sure if it was pity. No, it was something deeper than that. This women couldn't return home, much as she was going to leave the only home she had ever known.

But would he really keep something like that a secret from her. Was he ever even planning on telling her that she was not his own? Now – being that she was far from home, in a sense that this time period was thousands past her own – it seemed she would never discover the real truth. Why she had been abandoned. What caused it? These were questions that only time would reveal. And even then, she wasn't so sure.

So, what do you think Janus told Gwen? Anyone think they know? Please keep up with the reviewing. I know I say this a lot, but you are all encouraging me to continue. Review Please!


	8. Coffee and French Toast

"This is incredible. When she said cure all, heal all she wasn't kidding." The device had appeared just as the walked into the room. He figured it sensed Gwen's presence and went straight to auto pilot.

"This will definitely make my job much easier. I assume you're both pleased with this break through." His statement was directed toward the scientist and the military officer.

"No complaints that's for sure."

"Well, if you'll all kindly leave, I'd like to get started on her blood work. She'll be staying the night and ..."

"What! I told you I was fine. Come on, please ... honestly, I couldn't be better."

"Sorry lass, but tonight you're with me."

"Great."

"Right, well Carson, I'm sure you won't mind if I just ask her a few more questions about this new technology. I'll just ..."

"Go Rodney. She'll be here in the morning when you get back."

He trudged away hesitantly.

John grabbed Elizabeth's hand and spun her around to face him as she tried to leave. "So?"

She looked up into his eyes amused. "So what?"

"Are you going to make it up to me or not?"

She let out a deep breath. "John ... you know how much I would love to just take off and spend the day with you, but ..."

"So do that. Take a break. Spend the day with me." Then he whispered in her ear. "You won't regret it."

"I'm sure that I wouldn't Colonel. But you said eight o'clock. I have a debriefing tomorrow night with Caldwell. I can't bail out on him again. Not after you dragged me away last time."

* * *

Gwen had been ease dropping. This two people interested her more than the others. It was funny the way Colonel Sheppard embraced this woman. Gwen could tell just by the way he would whisper into Elizabeth's ear that these two shared a special connection. She couldn't tell why they were so secretive though. If they loved each other like Gwen thought, why were they hiding their feelings? Or at least trying.

Maybe she could help them. Just a little.

" Elizabeth ..." They both turned to give Gwen their attention. "He doesn't mean eight o'clock at night."

"Yeah ... I mean eight in the morning."

"Where are we going to go at eight in the morning?"

"Well, if you want to know you'll have to come with."

She loved how he tap danced around everything. They both played this game really well. Maybe a little too well. This game of flirting.

"Alright John. I'll go."

"Good because I was going to take you whether you consented or not. And sense you have agreed I no longer have to kidnap you." He flashed her one of his famous flyboy grins. "Pick you up at eight."

"I guess so." She said as he walked off. " Carson ..."

"Yes, Elizabeth. I'll contact you as soon as the results are in. Now go get some rest."

"Yes sir. See you in the morning Gwen."

"Have fun."

She walked away shaking her head. That girl reminded her so much of ...

But she brushed it aside not thinking anything of it. Tomorrow she had a date with her Colonel.

* * *

She had set her alarm to go off at 7:30. She figured since she was going out with John, she could at least catch up on the shut eye that she had skipped out on the past few weeks. But when she woke to sounds of someone knocking on her door and then noticed it was 6 am, she groaned. Actually it was more like a whine. "John go away. It's too early!" She rolled over and curled back up into her warm goose down sheets. Only to be jolted awake by the small earthquake that over took her bed.

"Ahhh ... John what are you doing?" He laughed out loud. He loved the way she looked in the morning. Her curls were sticking up in odd places. She was curled away in the massive blanket that hid everything except the top of her head from his sight.

"Come on sleepy head. Rise and shine."

"John ..."

"I brought coffee and your favorite." She hadn't even noticed its sweet smell as he entered her room. It was wonderful. An aroma that consisted of strong, freshly ground coffee beans and maple syrup. He had brought her French toast.

"I don't deserve you."

"Probably not ..." He moved to miss the punch she'd thrown at his arm, but met hard ground instead of comfortable, cushion proof bed. Immediately Elizabeth's laughter followed.

"Did you want to change that answer?" She said in between giggles.

"Let's just say ..." He inched his way back onto her bed. "...we're even. My pride can't take much more."

"Even? Last I check the score was me: three, and you: zero."

"No, I faintly recall having at least one. Since the whole me going crazy thing didn't work out so well."

"Oh, so that's how you want to play it, huh." He inched closer to her now. His lips were only mere inches from her lips.

"Yup." Their lips lightly brushed for a moment, and then he pulled back and got off the bed.

"John ..."

"Get up and dressed. I'll meet you in the jumper bay in a little over an hour. Oh and enjoy your French toast." With that he was gone.

"Some wake up call."

* * *

He couldn't believe this. It didn't make any sense. They weren't even ... how did ... thousands of years. Remember that.

For the past thirty minutes he had been pacing his office wondering if he had made a mistake. He had even rechecked it. But without fail, his first presumptions had been right. And now he was going to confront her about. He had to admit that made him a little nervous, but it needed to be done.

He was going to go about it the rational way, but once he started toward where she lay he couldn't help himself.

"Why the bloody hell didn't you tell us!" Aw crap. She knew she should have mentioned this before he took a blood sample.

"So, I'm guessing you know."

"You're bloody right I know!"

"Why are you yelling?"

"I ..." He raised his index finger. "I'm not sure. But lass, why didn't you say anything?"

"First of all, I was afraid you would all react pretty much the way you just did. Second. I wasn't even sure myself. I've only known for a few months. Well, thousands of years if you count the time period that I was in stasis, but that's not the point. The point is I couldn't. And neither can you."

"I'd love to help you with this one, but they'll want to know. They all need to know. And if he finds out that I kept this from him ..."

" Carson, if I thought for one minute that it would help the situation any, I would have told them. But it won't. It hasn't even happened yet. And Janus wasn't specific. What if he was talking about someone else? I don't even know if it's them. And my father ... he never even told me. I went through eighteen years of my life not knowing. Beside their reaction. Could you even imagine? No, I'm not going to tell anyone."

When she saw him cross his arms and look at the ground, she knew she needed to make herself clear.

"And neither are you Carson. If I have to, I'll pull the physician patient confidentiality card."

"How do ye know about that?"

"McKay went on and on about it the second time I met him. So we're clear. You're not going to say anything. At least not yet."

"Yes luv, as much as I don't like this, I won't say anything."

"Good. I need to figure some stuff out first."

What did you think? What did  Carson confront Gwen about? What's she hiding from everyone? Let me know what you think about this. I'm sort of struggling a little. This chapter and last were definitely not my best. On a side note. I saw Stargate SG1 and Stargate Atlantis season premiers last night. All I can say is I love Sheppard's sense of humor. The premiers rocked! Review please. Need help. Any ideas? 


	9. This Could Be A Problem

"So ... what exactly did you have in mind?" They were walking through what reminded her of a tropical rain forest. Over-grown. Lush. Basically, it was one the most beautiful places she had ever been to.

"Impatient much? That's like the fifth time you've asked me where we're going."

"Sorry Colonel. I guess I've been hanging around my second in command too often. He's starting to rub off on me."

"Oh ... and this second in command? He a smart guy?"

"He has his moments." She knew exactly where this was going.

"Meaning what exactly?"

"Meaning, he has his moments, but then there's ... well I wouldn't want to BORE you with details about him."

"No, no ... details are good to know ... sometimes." She had him.

"Well then, he's smart. He's funny ..."

"Oh yeah, sounds like he's a pretty good guy." Considering he was that guy, and she, Elizabeth Weir was giving him free compliments. Or so he thought.

"Yeah, I guess." He stopped walking and looked up. She was in front of him now, walking away as if that comment was supposed to be left unanswered.

"What do you mean you guess? He's smart, funny, easy going, brave ... good looking. Need I say more?" He flashed her one of his boyish grins.

"To tell you the truth there really isn't that much to look at." She bit her bottom lip and smiled up at him wearily. Now he looked even more shocked. But he should have known. He had played right into her little trap. Ronon would've laughed at him at this point.

"Is that so? Well, I guess this second in command will have to convince you otherwise." With that he reached over and swung her over his shoulder, discarding the picnic basket he brought along.

He turned toward his destination and started at a sprint. "John ... put me down! What are you doing?"

"Like I said, convincing you."

"John, no. I was just kidding. You know I was just kidding! Now put me down!"

"No, I'm not quite sure that's such a good idea. Beside, what would be the fun of setting you down when I could toss you in?"

"John please ... wait. Toss me in? John, what do you mean toss me in?" But he didn't have to answer that because just as she looked up they reached the edge of a clearing. Before them was a lake that was a rich blue. Crystal like. Surrounding it were these huge trees that sort of reached out over the water. And toward the back was the most breath taking waterfall she had ever seen. Now if she had been paying attention to her current position and not the scenery, she would have noticed that John was only a few feet away from the shoreline. Gaining speed as he went. Which meant only one thing for her.

As he reached the edge of the water, he could feel her trying to get loose from his grasp, but he was so not ready to let go. Not yet anyways. Just a few more feet and in she goes. Then he could hear her scream his name. Pleas escaping her lips. "Bon voyage Liz." And with that he tossed her into the water. Screams of joy and shock escaping her.

As she lay there – sort of in a daze from being thrown in – she decided to do something a little evil.

John looked out at the water before him. For being so crystal clear he was having a hard time seeing a few feet in front of him. The other thing was she hadn't popped up yet. She should have come sputtering up to the surface for a breath of air by now. "Oh crap. John Sheppard you did it again!" He drove under the water thinking the worst.

He came up for another breath. " Elizabeth!" No answer. " Elizabeth!" Oh shit. This really isn't funny. What if she had hit her head on something when he threw her in? No, that meant he ... "Eliza ..." That's when something grabbed him and pulled him under.

He came to the surface gasping for air, only to be greeted by said woman. "I'm gonna ... you know you really scared the ..." But he didn't have time to finish because she swam forward and claimed his lips as her own. And just as he was really starting to get into it, she pulled back.

"You know. Despite all of his quirkiness, I really do love my second in command."

"Why Elizabeth! What would people think if they found out you had feeling for your ranking military officer!" A devilish grin taking over.

"Well, considering you're my second in command ... let's just say they can think what they want." He leaned in a kissed her lightly on her forehead and smiled back at her.

"I've missed this. Being here with you."

"I did too. Oh and Elizabeth ..."

"Hmm?"

"I love you."

"I love you more." It was a little game they played. One said I love you, the next I love you more, and ...

"You wish Elizabeth Weir."

An hour later they were up on the shore. John had gone back to retrieve the forgotten picnic basket and laid the blanket out on the sand. For lunch ... well let's just say it shouldn't come as surprise.

Two turkey sandwiches, lemonade and their favorite thing to share together: Rodney's chocolate chip cookies. Yeah, yeah, they know. Rodney bakes. For some reason you just don't associate the man with culinary arts. You know. It's like: presenting Dr. Rodney McKay, lead scientist, astrophysicist, destroyer o the little people, and cook ... didn't get much better than that.

But they weren't afraid to say, the man made one good cookie. After lunch Elizabeth lay out on her stomach and started reading. Unfortunately John noticed. Not that reading was bad, but the topic of which she was reading ... well. He didn't like where this was going.

"Liz?"

"Yes John?"

"What ya got there?"

"Nothing." She was still reading the alleged piece of material as he walked up behind her.

"Give me that!" He snatched it out of her hands.

"John! I need to finish that!"

"No ... no, what you need to do is have fun, relax. You don't, however, need to catch up on reports." He was about to go on, but something out of the corner of his eye caught his attention.

"John give it back, I need ..." But at that moment he practically dove on top of her and placed his hand over her mouth.

"Shhh ..."

"John ..." She pulled his hand down. "What are you doing!"

" Elizabeth, please." He spoke in hushed tones while pointing out just a mile or two toward the other side of the lake.

She turned her attention toward the direction in which he was pointing. A little annoyed at first, but once she saw it she became dead silent. A Wraith hive ship had just landed.

Why hadn't they heard it? Shouldn't they have been able to hear it entering this atmosphere?

"Come on ... we need to get back to the jumper. Leave everything here. It can be replaced." He grabbed her hand and tugged her toward the tree line for cover. They were lucky they hadn't been found. How could he let his guard down like that? If they had been caught? He didn't even want to think about that. But it was okay ... the jumper was just up ahead and they would be perfectly safe. She would be perfectly safe. But then he saw them. Two Wraith gunners. They were circling the jumper. Obviously waiting for it owners to return.

John back tracked still holding onto Elizabeth's hand. Come on John. Think. Think. But at the moment he wasn't really sure what he could do. Sure he had his P90 with him. He wasn't stupid. He wouldn't come out here in the middle of the galaxy without something to protect her with. But he wasn't willing to go up against he didn't know how many Wraith at the risk of her getting injured in the process. So he did the only thing he thought was a good idea. He headed for the cave.

It's a little evil I know. Thanks all for the reviews. Some of your response shocked me. I was like wow, they're really getting into this. Some of you are dead on with where this story might be going. Well, all I have to say is: thank you for your continuous support. Please let me know what you think of this chapter. I was sort of going to do this different, but then I thought of something else. I hope you like it. Please review. Trying to update more tonight. I leave for my mission's trip tomorrow, so I'll be out of the updating business for about twelve days. No internet access in  Honduras. I'm sorry. I'll try to update another chapter tonight. Please enjoy! Review! Please! 


	10. You're Late

They had reached the entrance to the cave. Thank God he had scouted this area before he brought her here. He had no idea where they would have gone if he hadn't known where this cave was. Now all they had to do was wait it out. Even better they had to wait it out soaking wet. Right as they turned to get out of sight of the Wraith, a tropical storm started.

"John ... what are we going to do?" She was breathing heavily. They had run the whole way here. It was about a mile and a half.

"We can't do much until they leave and who knows ..."

"When that'll be." He loved it when she finished his sentences. He knew that he couldn't hide anything from her. No matter how hard he tried.

"Okay so ... why don't we go a little deeper into this cave? Last time Rodney and I were here with Ronon we figured it went about a mile in. There's some dry wood in here. Actually it's a tree. Growing right out of the cave wall. It's pretty cool really and ..."

"Okay Colonel." She smiled up at him. She loved it when he got side tracked like that. "Let's go find this tree. We can probably make a fire and start to dry off."

"Sounds good to me." They walked farther into the cave, acting like teenagers. Holding hands. Turning the other way when the other caught them staring.

When they came to the tree growing out of the wall, they split off in opposite directions to pick up fallen branches for firewood.

* * *

How does she do that? All she's doing is collecting twigs and ... let's just say I love it. I never thought I'd find someone like her. She's so different than the others. She makes me feel ... I can't even explain ... it's simple to just say I love her. But that's not enough. I love her more than that. She's the best thing that's ever happened to me. And here we are stuck in a cave without anything to do. He stole a glance over his shoulder. She was beautiful even in the dark.

* * *

I can't believe this happened. Of all people to be stuck in a cave with. It had to be him. It's not like I can't help staring at him enough as it is. Now I can't get away from him. With the Wraith blocking one exist and the cave wall blocking the other. Then again ... no, Elizabeth you will not go there.

When she stood up abruptly to go look him, she collided with something behind her.

* * *

He decided to walk over there. She was kneeling on the ground. But then, when he got close. Well, let's just say now they were sprawled out on the floor. Very close together.

"Sorry, I wasn't paying ..." But as far as he was concerned she didn't need to say anything else. He practically leapt on top of her, claiming her lips in the process.

"John ..." It came out in a moan, which only drove him on. God he loved this woman. More than life, more than ... anything.

"I love you."

"I love you too."

* * *

So that's pretty much how he ended up here. Curled up next to the fire they had made with her snuggled up close to him. He gently combed his fingers through her brunette curls while she slept peacefully. About thirty minutes ago he had checked outside to see if the area was clear. One the rain had stopped, two it looked like morning. And three, most importantly there was no sign of the Wraith. When she woke he planned on getting her back to the city, where she would be safe.

He felt her shifted under his arms. "John ..."

"Morning sleepy head." He smiled down upon her. She was beautiful in the morning. Scratch that. She was beautiful morning, afternoon, and evening. He couldn't help but stare at her intently.

"What are you looking at?" She blushed under his gaze.

"You."

"Me."

"Yup, just looking at you. Admiring you. I told you I love you right?" A boyish grin creeping its way to the surface.

"Yes, John. You most certainly did."

"Good. Just thought you should know."

"Well, I'm glad you decided to tell me."

"Me too."

* * *

Three hours later, they were back at their abandoned jumper. Thankful that it was still in tacked. It was bizarre to John though. Why had they Wraith taken off like that? And where did they come from to begin with? It was something that he was going to have to ask Rodney when they got back.

But as they stepped out of their jumper, he figured his questions could wait, because all he wanted to do was get as far away from McKay as possible.

"Where were you two! We were worried out of our minds? Nothing. No phone call. No message to let us know you were staying later than originally expected! You do realize you're way overdo and ..."

"What did you want us to do Rodney? Phone you to let you know we were going to miss dinner?"

"And breakfast." Elizabeth said it loud enough for everyone in the room to hear, but John wanted to say it anyways.

"And breakfast. Well, we're sorry. There. It's not like being chased by the Wraith, dodging a tropical storm, and being stuck in a deep dark cave wasn't enough. Now we need to apologize to you."

"It's not my fault that you're ... did you say Wraith?"

John shook his head up and down.

"That could've been a problem."

"Yes Rodney. That's why we stayed in the cave over night. We didn't exactly want to have a run in with the Wraith with little protection."

"Why didn't you just go back to the jumper?"

"Am I speaking English or is he deaf?"

"Rodney, I think what John means to say is he and Elizabeth initially tried that, but were cut off by the Wraith, so they sought shelter in the cave. It's really not that hard to understand."

John glanced over at Gwen. "What she said. Now if you'll excuse us, I think changing out of these clothes sounds quite appealing right now. Don't you agree Dr. Weir?"

"Why yes, Colonel. Changing out of these clothes does indeed sound quite appealing." And with that they both hurried out of the room.

"Do you think that was a sexual innuendo or were they serious?" Gwen wanted to smack him at that moment. Was the man really that oblivious?

"Rodney, sometimes the best thing you can do is be quiet."

"Hey, I resent ..."

"Rodney ... I could have just said shut up. But I chose to be a little nicer than that. Please be quiet."

"Right. I'm head of the science department and since she's apparently ancient she thinks she can just boss me around." He whined as he trudged out of the room.

"I heard that."

"I heard that." He mimicked her mockingly.

"What are you five?"

"What are ..."

"Rodney," It was Carson. "I believe that's enough."

"Sure, take her side." He stormed out of the room, mumbling something unrecognizable.

* * *

"So lass, have you remember anything else?"

"Just a date. Janus said it was important, but I'm not really sure why. He just said in time I would understand."

"Mind sharing this date with me?"

"Oh yeah, sorry ... July 31. I think he said 2006. That parts a little fuzzy as well."

"Well, at least that gives us a little more time to figure things out. You still need to tell them. I'm just not sure how. By the way. I've been meaning to ask you. How exactly do you know how old you are? You said it yourself. They never told you. And he never knew, so ..."

"Basically, Janus told me that he wasn't quite sure on what day, but he knew what week. So he guessed that I was born roughly in that same week."

"And when was that lass?"

She counted in her head. "Actually it would have been this week."

So, what's going to happen on the 31st of July? Other than that's the day I come back to you all. And what do you think I'm implying with the last few sentences? Thanks again for the support. I'll try to update as soon as I get back from  Honduras. Review please! Sorry you have to wait so long for the next chapter! 


	11. Stay

"So what you're saying is we should celebrate your birthday this week. Well then ... it's settled. I'll speak with Elizabeth and I'm sure ..."

"Wait ... slow down Carson. Celebrate my birthday? Why would I celebrate something when I don't even know what it is? A birthday?" Her hands were crossed and her brows were furrowed in a way that he was far too familiar with. He let out a deep sigh. One of shock.

"Gwen ... you just told me that you could assume or estimate that you were born this week. Right?"

"Yes."

"You took your first breath of fresh air sometime this week a few years ago. Am I correct?"

"Yes."

"Okay then ... on Earth we ..."

"Wait! No, you're wrong. Or more so I worded it wrong. What I initially referred to as my being born was what I assume you call origin."

"Origin? And please pray tell ... what is that?"

"Oh ... um ... different word." She looked around as if search for the right phrase. As if she would pull it out of thin air. Then it struck her like a rainy day on Atlantis. "Conception."

"Well, that simplifies things just a bit more. If your conception is this week ... then ... wait ... this week. That means ... they would have to be ... Oh great now I most certainly beyond a doubt know that ... oh bloody hell if he finds out that means I lost. I'll owe him the rest of my coffee stash and he'll be rubbing it in my face for ..."

" Carson?" He woke out of his dilemma. "Why not beat him to the punch? Change your bet. Then by the time he catches on it will be too late."

"Gwen ... I knew I liked you from the beginning. Now ... lass ... if you'd like I can calculate your actual birthday."

She thought about it, but she wanted it to be more of a surprise. I mean ... she'd spent all this time trying to figure out who she was ... where she came from ... most importantly she had been trying to see them for ... well, it had been a long time. And now with the answer right in front of her all she had to do was ask. But ... she didn't want to. There was something else – something more important that she had to finish first. She wasn't going to let Carson know that she already had the answers he was looking for. She couldn't. This was something she needed to do herself. She was going to save them. History wasn't going to repeat itself. She wouldn't allow it. Even if that meant ... as much as she wanted to tell them. Maybe ... no. She wasn't going to go there. It would only bring up more emotions that she couldn't handle.

"No thanks Carson. I was always one who liked the surprise better than knowing."

"Alright. If that's the way you want it. Now ... what was I doing before you and I ..."

"Retro virus ... but Carson."

"Yes?"

"Believe me when I say ... you have time to go have a cup of coffee with Laura first. Maybe even dinner." He looked at her quizzically. "In other words if you take a break from research and perfecting, you won't be losing valuable time. You're going to prefect it Carson. It doesn't matter when you do it, but it'll happen all the same. Now enjoy this place ... this marvelous city while you have it. Work will always be there when you get back."

As he smiled and started to walk away he turned back and walked over to her. Then he did something that she wasn't expecting to do. He embraced her in a hug. But it wasn't just a friendly hug. It was like she was being hugged by an uncle. Someone who cared for her. Someone who wouldn't let anything happen to her. Someone who most certainly loved her.

"Gwen ... you are very wise for your age. She'd be proud of you. They both would. I just want you to know that the more time I spend with you ... the more I see her beauty, her wisdom and way with words in you. They more I see his bravery, his strength and determination to help others. And something else that I could live with out; in you. I know that they would be proud beyond words. I just hope that they get to meet you in all honesty before you go and do something ..."

" Carson ... you're like an uncle to me. In fact you are. Then and now more than ever. I know you think I should tell them. I want to. I really do. I want to be able to hug her and tell her I'm her daughter. I want her to hug me back like there's no tomorrow. I want him to look at me and say he's proud of me ... of what I've done – of what I'm doing here. I want them to both know how much I love them, how proud **I am **of who they are and what they do. But Carson ... if I do that. I might not be able to do what I came here to do. The timeline could be changed even more than it already has. I can't risk missing my mark and losing what I came here to save. I won't live another eighteen years of my life not knowing who they are. I won't go through that again. Besides ... Janus was the only one of the ancients who would even help me. They would know exactly what I was up to if I had to go back again. I won't let history repeat itself. I wouldn't ..." She was sobbing at this point.

He had never known how much this had affected her. If he could take her place he would – in a heartbeat. But fact of the matter was: she was alone. Now more than ever. All he could do was hold her, like he would if ... if time would allow. Whatever it was that Gwen needed to stop. He would be there. He would help her to finish it.

No matter what the cost.

"I can't lose them again Carson ... I'm not strong enough."

"You won't have to love. Not this time."

* * *

He had left her alone after that. She said that she needed some time to think things through. None of it was fair. But she had known it would be like this from the start. Janus had warned her of such.

Right now all she wanted to do was breathe it in. This air – this breeze. It was her special place. Somewhere she could go when it hurt too much to talk to others.

She had first found it after Kara's death. Her ... well, her adoptive mother. The wraith had surprised them all. Their ship was attacked just as Kara and some of the others were trying to get back to Atlantis for the final shipment before they left their city forever. She had come here to scream out at whoever was listening. That's also when she decided to go back. She had been so angry with him for not telling her the truth that she didn't care anymore. She wanted to see them. And he could stop her. She had left her balcony that day to finish and begin something. And so far she had succeeded in at least one of those ... now all she had to do ...

She glanced over her shoulder as door swooshed open. "Oh ... I'm sorry ... I didn't expect anyone else to be out here. I'll come back later ..."

"No! I mean ... stay. We can share."

"Alright."

Sorry if this chapter confused any of you. I had to fix a mistake I made in chapter 10. Concerning Gwen's birth/conception. I messed up and couldn't fix it until after I got back from  Honduras. Anyways, sorry. Hope this chapter helps to clear some of that up.

Sorry this chapter was so short. I just wanted to get something uploaded for all of you. It's been a long two weeks. Thank you for being so patient with me. I'm back now, so the story will be finished up soon. I hope you all continue to like it. Thank you so much for all the reviews. You've been great. Keep it up! Constructive criticism is always wanted. Any suggestions? DO any of you think you have the plot figured out yet? Enjoy! Review please!


	12. Was It Just Me?

Elizabeth watched the young eighteen year old girl standing beside her. It was weird, but she felt as if she had known her for a life time. This young girl who never ceased to amaze her.

"You know ... this might sound strange, but you remind me of someone."

"Really ..." Gwen tried to play dumb, only she knew the answer. "Who?"

"It's baffling actually. You both have the same type of sarcastic nature. Colonel Sheppard and you."

"Yep." Elizabeth stared at her questionably. "I mean ... McKay said that too. Before at lunch. Something about the way I was staring at him. Like he was stupid or something. His words, not mine."

"Of course." Elizabeth breathed in the clear air. Gwen even tries to dig her way out of trouble the same way John does. The sound of the ocean resonating below them. "So ... why are you out here? Other than to escape from the business of the real world."

"How'd you know I was trying to escape?"

"Well ... for starters, this is where I come when I need to take a deep breath. It's calming out here. Always has been. Ever since John ... well ever since the first day we arrived here, this balcony has been sort of like my private getaway. In fact John's the only one who ever comes out here with me. Or at least he's the only one brave enough to cross that line."

"And what line would that be Elizabeth?"

She realized what she had just said. "No ... I mean ... he's the only person who would ever interrupt me ... not that he's interrupting me ... it's just that no one else ... oh my. How do I ..."

Gwen couldn't help but let out a laugh. "My, Elizabeth, I never expected you of all people to stumble over your words. You know, with you being a diplomatic leader and all. I was only kidding. But since we're on the topic, what's going on there?"

"What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean. Colonel Sheppard seems like a very nice person. He's funny, brave, smart, really ... what's the word ... hansom. Why haven't you two told anyone yet?"

"Gwen ... there isn't anything going on. We're just ... wait, what do you mean, why haven't we told anyone?"

"Elizabeth ... if you're going to tell me that you two are just friends, then we can change the subject. You can't get a lie past me. I'm part ancient remember. I can read your thoughts. Plus a couple of other really cool things, but that's beside the point. I would have known you two had feelings for each other even if I wasn't part ancient. Now spill."

But Elizabeth wasn't going to spill. There was something that Gwen had said early on in the conversation that struck her as odd. "Gwen, what are your parents' names again?"

"Moros and Kara. Why?"

"They're both ancient right? I mean as ancient as you can be. They both ascended completely?"

"Yes ... why do you ask?"

"Gwen ... when I first met you, you had told John and Rodney that your parents were ancient. And just now you said that you were part ancient." Oh no. She had slipped up. She might have been able to pull one over poor Rodney, but this was Elizabeth Weir. As in Queen of Common Sense. "If both of your parents are ancient, you in turn should be fully ancient. No strings attached."

"Right. Well, I am. I don't know why I said that. But I am. Okay ... problem solved ... I'm gonna go now. I'm pretty sure that's Rodney calling me. So I'll see you in a few." She started to back away hoping that ... well, just hoping.

"Hold it. What aren't you telling me?"

" Elizabeth. Believe me when I say: if I had all the answers I'd give them to you, but there's one thing that I can't seem to grasp."

"And what's that?"

"Why you and John continue to hide your feelings for each other from other people when all that does is hinder the potential an actually relationship could have." And with that Gwen left the scene.

"No, you can't just ... how did she ..." She just distracted me to the point where my thoughts were thrown out the window. She ... John's the only one who could ever do that.

* * *

He had been wrestling with whether or not he should do it. I mean, the man had been sitting there like that for almost two, three hours. Every time he walked by this room he had been sitting there like that. Just staring. Imagine what a little fun could add to the equation. 

"You should do it now before he decides to turn around and sees you. You know that once he spots you staring at him, he'll jump to only God knows what kind of conclusions." She leaned forward as she whispered it into his ear. "Plus you've been standing there almost as long as he's been sitting there.

"Gwen, keep it down. He'll hear you. Then what ... my cover will be blown."

"What cover? A wraith dart is quieter than you. Besides, he's wearing ear plugs." She pointed. "He couldn't hear either one of us, even if he wanted to. Now are you going to do it or what?"

"Be patient."

"Come on already."

"Jeez, what are you five?"

"Oh, nice. Come back with my own come back why don't you. Isn't that what I told Rodney just a few hours ago? You couldn't think of your own come back, so you had to steal one from the poor eighteen year old ..."

That's when he fired – not one, but three wads – one after the other.

* * *

They both flew out of sight, hiding behind the corner that barely peered into the lab. 

"John! I meant it when I said ..." He was shouting when he turned around and saw that he was alone. "Okay ... McKay, get a grip. You're just paranoid because Zelenka screwed up again, after you explicitly explained to him how to proceed with this experiment. And now you should ... well, now you should stop talking to yourself." He sat back down to finish what he had started before he had so rudely been interrupted by John's invisible spit wads.

* * *

"Nice shot." 

"Yeah. That's what four years of high school math class with Mr. Radford teaches you."

"I take it he wasn't the most intriguing person."

"The year I took geometry he was the teacher. Then the administration decided he was a good choice for the Algebra II teacher. And then Calculus and same for Trig. I already knew most of it. Taught myself. So while he sat in front of the class on his old wood stool while spreading his legs a part a little too much, I shot spit wads out at Nicole Johnson."

"And why, pray tell did you do that."

"She was my high school crush."

"My point exactly. Isn't that something you do in middle school? Pick on the people you secretly like."

"No. I just ... well we were really good friends and we goofed off a lot."

"Kind of like you and Elizabeth?"

"Yes, exactly like Elizabeth and ... no, no. I didn't say that. I mean ... we ... she ..." He was going to say something else, or at least try and say something else, but he wasn't really getting anywhere at the moment. Except for deeper and deeper into his hole. You know the one that he seems to have to dig his way out of repeatedly.

"Relax John. Your secret's safe with me."

He looked at her in the same way that **she **always did. The smile and everything – it was the same down to the very last dimple. "You know ... you remind me of someone."

"Yeah, I've been getting a lot of that lately."

"No really. I thought it was familiar when I first met you, but now I know for sure. Your smile's the same. Even the way you talk is the same, your ... I guess you could say your etiquette's the same."

"Etiquette? When on Earth did you, John Sheppard, start using the word etiquette? For as long as I have known you, you have never once used that word."

"You mean for the past four days that you've known me." He was laughing on the inside. "You definitely remind me of Elizabeth."

"I guess I'll take that as a compliment. There are far worse things that you could say."

"Oh, you mean like, you're as annoying as a certain scientist that we all know and love and love to ..."

"No. You are not going there. He's like my uncle. There is no way that he and I are even remotely similar. Especially since we aren't even related. Or at least not by blood. No, you're not going there. Beside, if anyone's similar to him, it's you!"

"Me! And what gave you that idea?"

"Oh please, the constant bickering, the pranks, the nagging. What doesn't shout, 'we're the same person, only one of us has really great hair and the other is deathly allergic to citrus.'"

"Hey, we don't bicker that much and ... wait. Did you say he was your uncle?"

"No."

"Yes, you did. Or at least you said and I quote, 'Or at least not by blood,' end quote."

"No. And ... and beside, you changed the subject. You never answered my question."

"You never asked me anything. And now you're changing the subject."

"Well, then answer my question now. Why are you so secretive about how you feel about Elizabeth? Why not go public? Isn't love stronger than that?" And with that she hurriedly escaped the scene.

And he was left there even more confused than he had initially there. "If Rodney's her uncle ... but then that would mean she would have to be hers or his ... but there's an infinite amount of possibilities and they ... or they ... she would be ... when did all this become so complicated?

* * *

She was sitting behind her desk massaging her temples when he came storming in with his hand raised in the air like it always is when he's been thinking about something for far too long. 

"I just had the strangest conversation with Gwen. One minute we were talking about spit wads and my good aim, Nicole Johnson, how Rodney's her uncle – although not by blood – then out of no where she asking me questions about you and I. There was no end, no answers! And to top it all off, she left me standing there even more confused than I am when Rodney goes off on tangents in the debriefing room." That's when he noticed she was slouched over in her chair with her elbows propped up to support her aching head. "What happened to you?"

"Pretty much the same thing as you. We started off on the balcony talking about why she was out there. Although she never answered my question. Then out of no where ... actually she sort of pulled the words from my head and twisted them to her liking. Then she started asking me about us. Which turned into a confusing conversation about whether she was fully ancient or part ancient. All in all, she's very smart with words. She chooses them carefully as not to give anything away. The whole time my mind was racing to try and keep pace." At this point she was still leaned over trying to comprehend everything that had happened. "Wait, who's Nicole Johnson and what do you mean Rodney's Gwen's uncle?"

"Oh, she's no body. And Gwen said these exact words, 'He's like my uncle. There is no way that he and I are even remotely similar. Especially since we aren't even related. Or at least not by blood.' She tried to talk her way out of that one, but I think she was still confused over why I thought you two were similar. I mean her smile, down to the last dimple is exactly like yours, and when I mentioned etiquette. She went off on me on that one. Totally avoided what I was saying. I don't know. I was confused, I'll at least admit to that."

"Stop. When did you start using words like etiquette? No scratch that. You told her that she and I are similar in more ways than just our smile?"

"I'm telling you Elizabeth, your smile is identical. And yes."

"And she tried to avoid that?"

"Well, not exactly. She just said that she had been getting a lot of that lately."

"She was probably talking about me."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I sort of told her that she reminded me of you. You both have the same kind of humor. You're both sarcastic. You pick of Rodney. She has this way of trying to back out of things. It just like you, the puppy dog face and everything. But she changed the subject on me once I asked her about her parents. I mean, you remember, she told us they were both ancients, right?"

"Yeah."

"Well, when we were talking out there on the balcony, she told me not to lie to her about my feelings for you because she already knew what I was thinking because she was part ancient."

"And ..."

"John ... if her parents are both ancient, then she should be fully ancient – not part. The whole conversation was one huge ... I don't know. And then I ran into Carson on the way here. I relayed everything to him and he did that thing he does with his hands when he's nervous."

"What thing with his hands?"

"You know that fiddling thing."

"Oh yeah."

"He never answered. He just made up an excuse and walked away. And you know he is a horrible liar, always has been. He knows something.

He stayed silent for a few moments - trying to collect his thoughts so he could come to a descent conclusion with all the information he had just been given. Let's see: Rodney equals uncle - although not by blood. Check. Elizabeth plus Gwen equals identical smile and etiquette. Check. Same sarcastic nature as me, John Sheppard. Check. Part ancient. Check. Flawed story. Check. Nervous Carson. Check. You have got to be kidding me.

" Elizabeth? What's the one thing that neither one of us want other people to know?"

"You mean beside that we are both secretly behind Rodney's missing chocolate bars?"

"Yes."

"Well, there's the whole secret relationship thing."

"And we both can agree that Carson knows."

"Right."

"And if he became nervous when you asked him questions and Rodney's her uncle only not by blood. Then that means?"

"John do you think that she's ..."

"It makes sense."

"But why would we do that to her?"

He just shook his head in defeat. "I don't know."

So, what do you think? Was that confusing? Please let me know. I feel like I lost a lot of you because I was out of the writing business for two weeks. Please leave positive feedback and constructive criticism. It really helps. Please review. Enjoy!


	13. Only Choice

He could see them through the glass walls that surrounded her office. Even if you wanted to be hidden from view you couldn't be. And at the moment he wanted to run like he was being chased down by a wraith who hadn't fed for months.

His little run in with Elizabeth had been bad enough. She was suspicious – all the questions. Making up a horrible excuse about needing to practice his sparring technique was bad enough. He doesn't even spar. But to top it all off, he knew Elizabeth could see right through him.

* * *

"I would never in a million years do that to her. Neither one of us would. So I don't understand what could possibly be so bad that we would have to send her there. Why not to Earth? Why did it have to be to a different time period?"

* * *

He could see her frustration and his confusion. It was now or never. Either way, it wasn't going to be easy telling them. And Gwen – oh ... she would not be happy.

Luckily for him she came running up from behind at that moment. He turned to greet her, only to be greeted by the breeze that met him as she ran past – straight up to Elizabeth's office.

* * *

"Rodney wants to talk to the both of ..." But when she saw them both looking at her like that she knew it was over. "Bad time. I'll come back later. A lot later." She turned to run, but was stopped by Carson blocking her nearest exit.

"I know that you didn't want to tell them, but ..." He looked over at the two leaders before him. "Now doesn't exactly seem like the time to keep secrets. Especially one of this magnitude."

" Carson. You know I can't. I can't take the chance that something will happen. Not when I've come so far."

"Love, you and I both know that you haven't been completely honest – even with me. They need to know."

"Gwen ... why didn't you just tell us? I mean ... were we so horrible that you couldn't bear for us to know?"

"No. You were both the best parents that anyone could ever ask for. You have to understand that I wanted so badly for this to work. But the only way I could ensure that it would was to play dumb. I couldn't let any of you suspect that I was your daughter. That's why I acted like I was angry with John in the beginning. You had to think that I had no idea as to who you were. And in all honesty I didn't. The only memory that I have of either one of you is very faint. And Janus was there so I never really knew who you two were. I just knew that I needed to find you. And when I got here – when I saw that my plan had worked, I knew that I couldn't let my emotions get in the way of my true goal."

"But Gwen ... why didn't you just tell us? I'm sure that whatever it is that you're trying to stop can be prevented, especially if we all know about it. We can all work together to stop whatever it is."

"NO! I can't tell you. Don't you see! You never would have sent me back to live with them. You never would have let me grow up with the ancients if it hadn't happened!"

"Gwen!" Now he was yelling. He just wanted to know what could have possibly been so horrible that she would be dancing around the subject like this. "What happened?"

She fell to her knees crying what tears she had left. It was too hard now. They knew what her secret was. They knew she was there daughter. Before when it was a secret it was easier. There was no recognition that she was attached to them. But now they knew.

"Don't you see?" She whispered silently. "You both died. There was a wraith attack on the city. When you dialed the gate to go to Earth something went wrong. There was an explosion. You both had already sustained critical injuries. Dad ... you had a bullet wound to the chest. Mom you ... the attack was too great. No one made it. There were too many Wraith. You never had a chance.

"That day was like any other. I was only a few months old. The city had been peaceful for a while. No Wraith activity. No trouble. Nothing. But then ... out of nowhere they attacked. Bringing with them a fleet of Wraith the size of which we have never seen before. I don't know why it happened. Or how the Wraith got so close without the deep space sensors going off, but ... even if we had known. The number of Wraith that attacked was greater than I or Janus have ever seen.

"As the city began to fall it took with it the lives of good men and women. People you worked with. Rodney stayed behind. He was a hero. He wanted to help the others. Ronon and Teyla ... they evacuated as many people as they could to the alpha site. But our loss was already too great. You both were the last. Realizing that there was nothing left to do but try and escape, you dialed the one place you knew the Wraith didn't know about. Earth. But as you ran down the steps of Atlantis toward the even horizon, there was a numerous amount of explosions. Once you stepped through, the explosion caused the gate to jump. But instead of jumping to another planet it jumped to the same location in a different time period."

Silence filled the room as Gwen's words were soaked in. Elizabeth was speechless; tears were slowly weaving a path down her pale cheeks. John reached for the nearest chair beside her. This was more than they had expected.

John wet his dry lips. He was afraid to ask, but he wanted to know. He needed to know.

"What happened after we reached the other side?"

"The ancients were there. From what Janus tells me, they were all shocked to see you both. Two Earth people. Kara, the woman that I have known all my life to be my mother, was the first to approach you both. You were just lying there – on the floor. Both exhausted. Dad ... your arms were wrapped around mom ... even in death you wanted to protect her. Your love ... it shines clearly now and then ... in that time ... death couldn't hide your true feelings for each other. Kara ... knelt down to touch you and that's when she discovered the baby – held protectively in your hands." She looked the mother she had never known in the eyes. Gwen's bottom lip trembled. She was trying to hold back the tears, but ... having to retell this ... event in her life, having to tell them how they died was harder than actually experiencing it herself. "You both died on these front steps. I never got a chance to know you. Or to love you. But Kara and Moros ... they stepped in and protected me – from the truth. They weren't going to tell me what happened on that day. They were going to keep playing the roles of my parents. But ... ever since I can remember, I've always had this yearning for something more. I felt like something was missing in my life and when I approached Janus ... when I asked why I was so different from the others ... I knew. You see, the one thing that I inherited from you dad ... the only thing that made me like them – like the ancients – was the ability to hear peoples' thoughts. Your ATA gene ... it was passed on to me. And Kara was able to help me strengthen that.

"When Janus paused and didn't immediately answer me ... I could hear his thoughts. He was thinking about two people he had seen only briefly. A couple that loved each other so much. I saw through him you. I saw you laying there on the floor. And when I confronted him about it ... he told me everything. Then he helped me to remember. Memories that should have been lost. Another useful thing that I gained from Kara was her help in cultivating abilities that I would have been unable to access if I hadn't been taught the proper way to help them grow. Janus and Kara helped me to see into to the past. To see your lives. Everything that you'd both been through. I saw that day play over and over and over again. In my head. And after that ... nothing was the same. When the Wraith attacked Atlantis, Janus gave me a choice. The only mother that I had ever known had died by the hands of the Wraith and Moros ... I was too angry with him to see that he only ever wanted to protect me. Janus helped me to recalculate one of the stasis chambers. And I slept there until just a few days ago. When the hologram devise was activated and my mind was projected out to John. He woke me. I wanted to cry right then and there. But I knew that if I didn't go through with the plan, then it would have all been worthless."

"Oh my God." Everyone's attention was thrown toward the man standing in the doorway. "You went through all that ... just to come back and save us. To save them didn't you. You never got a chance to know your parents ... to really know John and Elizabeth. But why all the secrecy? You could have just told us and then we could have figured something out?"

"She couldn't tell us because then we would have stopped her." John faced Elizabeth. "You were going to do whatever it took to save us. Weren't you? Even if that meant sacrificing your own life. That's the only reason you would have kept something like this a secret."

"You have to understand. Rodney and Carson they're both needed here. Think about it. Who's the one person that comes to mind when you think that there might be a slight chance that the impossible could become possible? And Carson ... I told you that you'll perfect the retro virus. It may not be today, but it happens. You finish it. And you two ..." She looked at her parents. "You're the leaders of Atlantis. This city ... these people they need all of you. I'm the only person that's expendable here ..."

"No you're not!" John was standing up now. "You're our daughter. You're the last person here who's expendable!"

"But don't you see ... if I'm here now, then I'm already saved! All I have to do is save both of you. Save all of you. I don't want to grow up away from you again. I can't do that again. Not after spending time with you here."

"We won't let you give up your life in order to save ours. Gwen ... I know that this is hard for you, but please ... there has to be another way."

"No ... I've already made up my mind. It's not like I'll be gone forever. The only way I'm even standing here before you is because I've already been conceived. History is already starting to repeat itself. In a little over a year, you'll all be dead. And I won't let that happen again."

And with that she got up and ran out of the room. John rushed up to go after her. "John, wait ..." Elizabeth stood up and walked over to him. "We need to give her some time. From what she just told us we have a year to figure something out. To find a better solution. Maybe we'll find another ZPM by then. A lot can happen in a year. But for now ... we need to let her – let our daughter figure a few things out for herself." John pulled Elizabeth into a hug. She rested her head in the crook of his neck. This was a lot for one person to handle. But at the moment all he felt was love. He was in love with Elizabeth at that moment. Not only because she always knew what to say, not only because she always saw the good in him, not only because she laughed at his stupid jokes or that she was the most intelligent person that he knew, but that at this moment she was carrying their unborn child. A child who would grow up into a beautiful young woman. He was so proud of Gwen for coming back. Not only because he came here to save them, but because she was everything that he ever wanted in a daughter. She knew what it meant to love something greater than herself.

He turned Elizabeth around and kissed her on the forehead. And smiled.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"We have a daughter?"

Then Rodney piped up again out of nowhere. "Ewwww! That means ... oh great. Just great. Now I have to deal with the fact that I owe Carson and Zelenka everything that I have left. The chocolate, the tea. Everything! And you ..."

Carson looked up.

"When did you know she was their daughter? Huh? Because I know that's why you changed your bet to this month. Otherwise I would have won and you would have had to make my bed and say, 'Rodney is a genius' for three months. You cheated!"

"Rodney ... it was fair. And you owe me the rest of your coffee stash as well."

I had a hard time writing this one. It mostly focuses on Gwen and how she dealt with everything that brought her to John and Elizabeth. I hope it's not too confusing. I don't really like this chapter that much. I think I could have done better. But then again, there's always room for improvement. I hope you all enjoyed that chapter, this story is almost complete. So what do you think Gwen is going to do?


	14. I Can't Believe We Did That!

It wasn't fair. She had come all this way and everything seemed to be falling apart.

_This won't be easy. They're not just people you're trying to save. They're your parents. It'll be harder for you to go through with this because you won't be able to reveal your true identity to them. _

Janus's last words before he left rang true in her ears. "No one ever said this would be easy. And I'm not asking for easy, I'm just asking for help. I want to get to know them, but at the same time ... it'll hurt more in the end if I'm attached."

_You're already attached._

What do you know?

_Well ... considering I'm your conscious ... I'd say I know a lot._

I don't want to leave them, but I have to. There's no other way.

_Just because you're doing this to save them doesn't mean you have to push the people around you away. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. Maybe you've been given the chance to come here so that you can gain back some of the time you lost with them. _

But in the end, it'll only be harder to let go.

_Maybe, but do you really want to spend the next year ignoring them? Can you even do that? You saw how they reacted back there. They love you. All of them do. From the beginning Rodney felt like he needed to protect you. You heard his thoughts remember? He was afraid to let you out of stasis. He wasn't sure whether there would be negative side effects. And John ... you saw the way he looked at you. __Elizabeth__ looked at you the same way. They love you. All of them do. And the time you've spent with __Carson__ ... they don't deserve to be shut out._

When'd you become so wise?

**_We _**_take after our mother. If you recall, she's a diplomat. Just like her, we've always had the answers we were looking for deep down. You just need to trust in yourself. Trust your heart – your instincts. They won't ever fail you._

So what now?

_What do you think?_

She knows I'm out here. If they wanted to talk to me they would.

_That's just a cop out and you know it._

They're giving me time to think.

Gwen set her gaze on the crashing waves below. No matter what's going on in my life these waves always know how to calm my nerves. Something that she recently found out she had in come with her mother. The sun was starting to set.

"Time for damage control." And with that Gwen took one last glimpse at the warm colors of the setting sun and made her way back inside to get to know her parents before time ran out.

* * *

"You two really disgust me." They had been stealing glances at each other for the past hour and a half. "I mean ... really. Get a room. It's bad enough that I lost a bet because you two couldn't control yourselves for another month. Now I have to sit here while you two rub the out come in my face. Rude." Rodney picked at what appeared to be chicken. "Is this lemon chicken?" 

"Rodney, if you're so disgusted why don't you go eat over there ..." Carson said pointing toward the corner table currently occupied by a certain scientist whom everyone loved to hate. "I'm sure Kavanagh would love to hear about your squabble. And no it's not lemon chicken."

Carson smiled proud of himself for the moment. But just as Rodney was about to retaliate a certain eighteen year old walked over to their table.

"Oh ... hi Gwen." John and Elizabeth immediately looked up at Rodney's words.

"Hi. Mind if I join you?"

"No not at all." Carson scooted down allowing her to seat just across from the Colonel and Dr. Weir.

Elizabeth smiled at the young woman that was yet to be born. She couldn't believe how she had never noticed all the similarities before. Her smile, her long brunette hair that curled ever so slightly. Her sense of humor. The way she always seems to be getting into trouble. Something that she obviously inherited from her father. She was the spitting image of the both of them.

Gwen smiled back. It was good to hear her mom making the comparisons. She wasn't going to tell her that she was listening in, but the feeling that she was getting from the two sitting before her was overwhelming. But in a good way. She could literally feel how much they loved and cared for her.

"How was the sunset?" Elizabeth asked her not thinking twice about what she knew the response would be.

"What colors do you think it was?"

"Wait ... where'd you watch it from?" John piped in, only to be ignored.

"Deep reds and oranges. Maybe a little pink and yellow."

It hit him. "When'd you take her to the balcony?"

"I didn't."

"I found it one night after the Wraith attached one of our cargo ships. I sort of just stumbled upon it by mistake. But ever since ... I go to it whenever I need to get something off my mind. It's ... hard to explain. But ... it makes me feel ..."

"Safe." She looked at him.

"Yes. Safe."

"Like mother like daughter." John grinned ear to ear at that one.

"Oh please ... you spend just as much time out there as I do."

"Yes ... but I only go because you're out there waiting for me."

"No, you go because you can't stand to be away from me. Not because I'm waiting."

"Hey ... I object to that. I do believe that there have been times when my aid has been needed and ..."

"Alright! So agree to disagree on this one and get over it already."

"What's his problem?" Ronon and Teyla had just set their trays down to join the others.

"Oh ... nothing much. Rodney here's still upset that Carson won the betting pool. It cost him all his precious coffee." John tucked Elizabeth's hand into his own.

"And my chocolate and the tea! Although all I really care about is the coffee. The chocolate's been disappearing periodically for the past few months or so. I swear Zelenka's been stealing it, but the man won't admit to the crime. Just keeps saying he has no idea what I'm talking about. But I saw the way he looked at me the other day. He had culprit written across his forehead."

John spit out the water he had just tried to down. Spraying Rodney in the face – causing everyone at the table to burst out in laughter. Secretly knowing what the cause of John's garrote, Elizabeth covered her face in embarrassment.

Flashback

"John ... he's going to start noticing if we keep doing this."

"Oh come on. Where's your sense of adventure? Beside, please tell me the benefit of doing this is worth the risk?"

"Oh ... you mean sneaking into his lab at midnight every Thursday while he's off watching that same episode of the Twilight Zone to steal one chocolate bar to **share**? That benefit?"

"Okay so when you put it like that it doesn't sound as rewarding." Then he looked at her with that, 'I have an idea that's probably not the smartest idea, but I'm going to do it anyways,' grin on his face. "I guess that means we'll have to steal two this time."

"Oh joy."

End Flashback

"Ewww!" He shot up out of his chair. "I can't believe you just did that! I'm ... disgusting! Look at this ..." He pointed to his attire. "I'm soaked in you saliva filled water! Disgusting!" And with rushed out of the cafeteria mumble something incoherent under his breath.

Okay so it's a shorter chapter and it doesn't really shed light on anything in particular, but what can I say. I love picking on Rodney. Hope you enjoyed this chapter. It's more upbeat. Comments? Constructive criticism? Please Review! I need help in forming ideas. So do you have any ... I'll be sure to thank you later. Please review. Oh and continue to enjoy!


	15. The Ruins

"Please."

"No."

"Pretty please."

"I said no."

"Oh come on, just this once." The expression on his face told her no. "It would just be this one time. Please."

"I'm sorry, I think I said ... **no**." Now he was just being sardonic.

"You're letting him go." She pointed at the scientist clearly having major issues with his pack. Teyla walked over to him offering her aid.

Rodney looked up at her comment. "I'm an important part of this team. If it weren't for me ..." He stalled trying to untangle himself. "... there would have been many instances in which these people would have been in calamitous peril." Teyla finally helped him to get situated. "I'm irreplaceable."

"What Rodney means is we need him to translate some of the ancient ruins just outside of the village."

"I can do that!"

"Yes ... well my assistance is needed in other ways as well."

"Colonel I do not see the harm. Perhaps if she came our time there would be cut in half. Not to say that your assistance would not benefit us Dr. McKay, but she did live with the ancestors for eighteen years of her life. Her knowledge is most likely a little bit more advanced than yours."

"What she said."

"Fine, but only if she says yes."

"Great. Now I'm not only needed, but I've been beaten out by a little girl."

"I'm not a little ..."

"Okay you two that's enough. Let me go ask first. Then we'll see."

* * *

John walked up to her office. Empty. Gwen snuck up behind him. "Mom ... I want ..." 

"Oh would you look at that. She's not here. I guess that means you have to stay. Sorry, maybe next time."

"No, that's not fair. You know exactly where she is if she isn't here. Beside, if you won't ask then I will." Gwen turned to run, but he was too fast for her.

"No you don't. I'll go talk to her. You just stay here."

* * *

The cool breeze was playfully flowing through her loose curls. It had been around five months since they had discovered her existence. Five months since they found out they had a daughter. And four months since... 

The doors swooshed open behind her. Not needing to turn around, she reached out her right hand waiting.

Sure enough he came up behind her taking her right hand and wrapping his left around her. "Hello Mrs. John Sheppard."

"Hello to you too. You never get tired of saying that do you?"

"Nope. And I never will. So how are you two today?"

"Well considering we have proof that nothing's gone wrong yet, I think we're just fine." He placed his hand on her expanding stomach.

"Good to hear."

"Not that your company isn't wanted, but weren't you scheduled to leave about three minutes ago?"

"Yeah. That's actually why I'm out here."

"She asked you again didn't she?"

"Yup."

"It's the village of Tania right?"

"The people are farmers. But ..."

"The Genii were farmers as well. Or at least appeared to be. Yes, I know."

"Teyla thinks we could use her help. She actually brought up a very good point. However, Rodney wasn't too keen on accepting it."

"Really ... why not?"

"She basically said that Gwen was better suited for the mission. That her knowledge of the ancients was greater than his own. And that Gwen's help would cut our time on the planet in half."

"So his reaction was similar to when Ronon beat him at chess?"

"Pretty much. If by that you mean: whining, pouting, the usual. I still can't believe you taught him how to play that? One would think the big guy wouldn't have the patience."

"Not at first, but after he said it was the stupidest game ever and started to leave to table, I might have **accidentally **mentioned that he probably couldn't win a game anyways."

"Reverse psychology. Clever."

"I thought so. Unfortunately, I think Rodney's still a little perturbed that I taught him how to play."

"Awe, you mean the poor guy's pouting over his loss."

She giggled. He tightened his grip on her. "You know, we can't keep her tucked away forever. As much as I want to keep her here on Atlantis, we can't keep her cooped up like this. She's a teenager you know. They tend to rebel when push comes to shove."

"A young adult about to become nineteen. But John what if she's just trying to get out so that ..."

" Elizabeth ... we've talked about this. If she has lied to us at all through out this whole thing, we'll never know. If we keep thinking she only wants to go off world for one purpose and one purpose only – to save us – then we'll never be at peace. You'll never sleep at night. Which means I'll never sleep at night. And we won't be able to enjoy the time that we do have with her while it lasts. We still have another four months to figure out how to stop her. We can do it. But for now ..."

"We need to let her have her freedom."

"Yup."

"Promise you'll bring her back safe, and when I mean safe, I mean promise you won't get into any trouble."

"What me? Trouble? I don't know the meaning of the word."

"John?"

"Okay. Don't worry, it'll all be fine. Just a simple mission ..."

"Don't say that."

"Don't say what?"

"Every time you say simple, just a recon mission, or it'll be a piece of cake something always goes wrong."

" Elizabeth?"

"What?" She leaned into him taking in his scent.

"When was the last time I told you I loved you?"

"Thirty minutes ago and then fifteen minutes before that."

"Well ... I love you and everything will be okay." She glared at him.

"What? I didn't say any of the things you listed off. I said okay."

She smiled up at him. Oh how she loved this man. From the moment he had asked her to marry him and way before that she knew she loved him.

"I'll see you when you get back."

"It's a date then." He said as he kissed her lovingly on the forehead. "I got to run; we should have left like ten minutes ago. And you should be on your way to Carson. You have a check-up or something don't you?"

"Yes, I was just about to be on my way when a very hansom stranger distracted me from my previous engagement."

"Well then, I guess I'll have to punish him later from keeping my beautiful wife from her doctor's appointment." He waved bye to her as he ran off toward his waiting team.

* * *

"So?" She was really really hoping the answer would be one that she'd like. 

He grimaced. "She said that it could be too dangerous. Something about not trusting my track record with off world missions. Apparently, they usually go bad."

"So I'm being punished because you have a signed taped to your back that says, 'Shoot Me!'?"

"No, but now you might be." He grinned.

"That was cruel dad. Just plain cruel."

"Well, you're going so go get your stuff." He said shooing her with his hands.

"I believe Ronon has that taken care of." Teyla reached out for the extra pack that Ronon was carrying.

"Yesterday, we felt that for the sake of time packing last night would be a wise decision."

"So you already knew I was going to say yes."

"Pretty much." Gwen piped in.

"She's a good fighter. Our training sessions have been going ..."

"Training sessions? You sparred with her?" He glared at Ronon.

"Actually Colonel Sheppard, I sparred with Gwen. Ronon was there to instruct her. She is as he says. You have mine and Ronon's word that we will not let any harm come to her."

"Good. I expect nothing less from the two of you. And Rodney stop pouting. You're still coming."

"I wasn't pouting!"

* * *

As soon as she stepped out of the gate she was amazed by the breath taking view before her. The trees were as tall as she remembered. The sky just as clear and blue. The ground was covered in white and yellow flowers. Similar to what her mom showed her was a daisy. 

"It's just like I remember it." It came out as a whisper Ronon heard it loud and clear.

"You've been here before?"

"A few times. Janus brought me here when I was twelve."

"What was the purpose?"

"I came to observe the building of the ruins that you're here to decipher." She ran up ahead giddily.

"Oh and you don't think that might have been just a little useful to know before we left Atlantis? Hmmm."

"I don't know Rodney. I figured if I told you that I already knew what the ruins said I wouldn't have been able to come. Plus even if we had come just to take a peek you probably wouldn't have come with us. I already know what it says, so why bother you when you could be at home in your lab yelling at poor Radek." She called back as she got farther and father ahead of them.

Rodney looked to John for assurance that him being left behind wouldn't happen. "Of course not." Then when Rodney looked away, John looked at Ronon and Teyla and mouthed, 'of course.'

"So Gwen ... mind telling us whether or not these people are friendly. We've had some bad experiences in the past with farmers."

She turned around while running backwards in the process. "As far as I can remember, they're peaceful, but that was like a few thousand years ago. Who knows what happened since then." Then she screamed falling backwards out of sight.

"Gwen!" John and ran as fast as he could to where he saw her disappear. Ronon and Teyla quickly behind him. Rodney ran faster than he'd ever run before only to be greeted by the sound of someone laughing.

There a few feet down lying haphazardly on the ground was Gwen in a heap of giggles. "I guess I lost my footing." She said trying to stifle her laughs.

"Yeah, well that's the last time you lose your footing missy. From now on you walk next to me."

That's when she stopped laughing. "Awe man."

"You scared the hell out of me."

"Sorry. If it makes you feel better the ruins are just a click away." Ronon reached out his hand and easily lifted her up. "Thanks." She brushed off her pants and started leading the way again. Only this time he was in step with her father.

A few hours later they were all sitting around eating power bars. Waiting for Rodney to finish taking energy readings. "Rodney I told you, when I was here with Janus I never ever saw or heard or read about a ZPM. Can we go now? I'm hungry. And these power bars ..."

"Are quite yummy, I know."

"I was going to say disgusting, but okay."

"I'm almost finished let me just ..."

"Shhh ..." Teyla and Ronon stood up suddenly. "Do you hear that?"

Gwen jumped up and started to panic. "Oh no ... no. We need to run! Now!"

"Wait Gwen!" But she had already started at a steady pace.

"I suggest you listen to your daughter." Ronon grabbed their remaining gear as did Teyla.

"What's going on? What'd she hear?"

"Colonel ... it's the Wraith."

So I believe that Kristeen asked for Sheppard whumpage. Well, you're wish is my command. Hope you enjoy! Oh and other suggestions are wanted. Really really wanted. Please let me know what you think. Please review! What did you think of this chapter? Enjoy!


	16. Please Let This Work

"Where'd they come from!" He shouted as he fired at the approaching dart.

Gwen was a good thirty feet in front of him. Hopefully she'd be able to get to the gate and dial so the others could follow. Rodney was lagging behind a little.

"Pick it up McKay!"

"Sure grab all your stuff and then leave me to fend for myself!"

"I grabbed your pack and said move it. What more did you want me to say!"

"Oh I don't know ..." He was running out of breath. "Maybe, 'The Wraith are coming, the Wraith are coming,' would have been nice to know!"

"I said that! Gwen shouted run and we all ..."

"Colonel ... I think that it is appropriate to say now is not the time. It appears that there is a hive ship just outside of this planet's atmosphere. And they're sending down more darts as we speak."

"So I guess it's a good time to point out that Michael still hasn't forgiven us forcing him to take the retrovirus serum."

"Safe! That happened over a year ago and he's still holding a grudge! I think, you can bet it sums it up pretty good."

"Colonel!" He looked in the direction that Teyla and Ronon started firing in. At least five Wraith had been beamed down. They were now commencing fire on their current position.

"Rodney get to the gate. Teyla, Ronon keep the gate covered. We need to get back to Atlantis!"

* * *

She had been running for what seemed like an eternity. The ruins had been a mile and a half away from the gate. So in reality she hadn't actually been running for that long, but with the gate in sight and the Wraith at their backs she wasn't about to slow down.

She still couldn't believe she just started running like that. But who could blame her. The Wraith ... as a child she had learned first hand that they were unpleasant. Growing up in the midst of a full blown war wasn't exactly what you'd call a good home environment. The Wraith had scared her from day one. They had been the cause of everything bad that had happened in her life. From Kara's death to her parents death to the destruction of Atlantis. The Wraith destroyed everything they touched.

Her fears of them were even more reasonable after what happened when she was ten. Janus had once again taken her out in the field with him. He did that a lot. He was the closest thing she ever had to a real father. Sure, Moros meant well, but they never connected. Janus was the one who was always encouraging her to expand her horizons – to appreciate everything around her.

That day they were visiting one of the neighboring villages just on the mainland. Janus, Malic, one of the military officers, and herself traveled to the village to check on how the people were fairing. Normally Janus wouldn't have been the one to go on such a excursion, however at that moment all other council members were need elsewhere. Thus the burden was placed upon him. As they were leaving, the village was attacked. The Wraith had struck again unexpectedly. That had been occurring more and more.

In all the havoc she became separated from the others. The next thing she knew a Wraith was stalking straight for her. She started to run, but tripped. Crying out ... all she could do was stare in fear as the creature come closer and closer. He was standing just above her ready to feed when she say Malic jump on him from behind. Janus was given just enough time to run up and grab her out of harms way. She never saw Malic again.

After that Kara refused to let her go off world for a while. The Wraith were becoming far more aggressive.

* * *

The sound of an explosion woke her from her memories. She spun around. The sight before her reminding her of that day. The field was a blaze. Ronon and Teyla were shooting at a dart which was losing control. Rodney ran past her ... screaming at her to keep moving. But she didn't budge. She couldn't.

"Gwen ... get moving! Tell Rodney to warn your mom that we're coming in hot!"

Her father's voice woke her from her daze and she sprinted for the Stargate. Then she heard it. His scream. She wheeled around only to see him fall.

"Dad!" She ran for him, ignoring Rodney's pleas for her to get back here. All she could think about was her father lying on the ground a few yards ahead.

* * *

"I told you to get to the gate." She fell to her knees taking in his injuries. They were bad.

"I need you to get up! We're almost there. Come on!" She tried to help him stand, but the searing pain in his side caused him to collapse to his knees once again. She couldn't support his weight. Just then she felt two strong arms take him from her.

"I got him." It was Ronon. "Just get through the gate, Teyla's laying down cover fire. Go!"

As they exited on the other side, Ronon laid John out on the floor. He practically dropped him. The smoke from the fire and exhaustion had slowed him down.

"John!" Elizabeth rushed to his side, cradling his head in her lap.

"Hey ..." He was losing consciousness and a lot of blood. Gwen rushed over to get a better look at him. Not everything was that bad, a few cuts and scraps, but his ... his chest wound was really bad. And no matter how much pressure she applied the bleeding wasn't going to stop. They were losing him. "How's my girls?" He closed his eyes.

"No ... John stay with me! Don't close your eyes, John you can't. Please." She was in tears. She couldn't lose him like this - not this way. "Stay with me! Where's Carson? We need a med team stat!"

"Dad ... please. Listen to mom. Listen to our voices! It'll be okay. I'm sorry. Please don't go."

"I love you guys." He grabbed their hands, blood smearing their skin. His blood.

"NO!" Elizabeth cried out. The tears blurring her vision. Gwen was still applying pressure, but the blood wasn't stopping. It was pooling all around them. Where was Carson? They were losing him. She couldn't let this happen. Not now. They needed him. She needed him. He was her dad. She had just gotten to know him, only to lose him. No, that wasn't fair. Then she remembered the one thing that Moros had taught her.

_If you believe in yourself and the people you love ... then you can do anything. Your gene may not be as strong as ours, but everything you need is there. Waiting. You just have to believe._

"Just believe. Just believe." She was whispering it over and over again. "Please, please ... I need you to stay. I'm not ready to lose you." That's when it happened.

Elizabeth gasped as her daughter's hands emitted a white light. The tears still creating a path down her cheeks. Both her hands still clasping John's. He wasn't moving. But the light continued to emit from Gwen's hands.

"Please work. Please." Her eyes were shut, but she could feel. Running through her. Something she had never done before, or even tried. But she could feel it. Her love for her father was saving his life.

Then it happened. He gasped for air, sitting up abruptly. "Oh my God! John!" He reached for her embracing her. "Don't you dare do that to me again!" She hit him on the shoulder.

"Hey. He grabbed her wrist and pulled her closer to him. "It's okay." He rubbed her back reassuringly. "I'm here." Where's Gwen?" Then Elizabeth looked over at her daughters still form on the ground. "Gwen!"

So, I'll be the first to admit that Sheppard Whumpage is not my best forte. But I tried. Please review! What do you think will happen next? Enjoy! 


	17. Safe For Now

She was running down a long corridor. Darkness slowly closing in on her. She wanted to stop ... but that wasn't an option. Not now, not ever. She was too close to her goal. And they were gaining on her. She let out a yelp, tripping over a stone tile in the floor that was protruding up. She could hear them getting closer. Almost at her back now. She stumbled to get up. Then he grabbed her from behind. It was over. She had lost.

"No!" She sat up, immediately blinded by the white lights. Getting a baring on her surrounding, she noticed she was safe in the infirmary.

"Gwen ... oh thank God." Elizabeth slowly got up out of the chair she had been occupying for the last hour or so.

"Where is he?" The first thought that came to mind was whether or not he was alive. The last thing she remembered was closing her eyes and pleading for his life.

"I'm right here." John rushed over to his daughter's side. "We were worried about you. You gave us all quite the scare."

"I can't believe it worked." Her whisper didn't go unnoticed. Gwen stared baffled at where his blast wound had been.

"Yeah ... thanks for that."

"Lass, if it hadn't been for you ..."

"I'd be six feet under." Elizabeth nudged him in the ribs. She glared up at him.

"Owe ... what?" His devilish grin creeping to the surface. "Sorry. Bad joke."

"What was going on?" Elizabeth eyed her daughter with worry.

"What'd you mean?"

"Gwen, while you were sleeping, I could hear you mumbling something."

"I checked your vitals, your blood pressure increased, your breathing quickened, your heartbeat sped up ..." Carson stared at her expecting an answer he knew he wouldn't get.

"... you were tossing and turning. I couldn't make out what you were saying until you started yelling no. I couldn't wake you." Gwen stared at her mother. Should she tell them? They had already been through so much. They didn't need to be bothered with this minor detail. Beside, it was only a dream right? No she wouldn't tell them. At least not yet. "It was nothing. A bad dream, that's all."

John looked at her intently. "Are you sure?"

"Positive."

"Okay." That seemed to ease everyone's nerves a bit. Or at least for the moment.

Gwen started to push herself off of the bed. "Now where do you think you're going missy?" Carson stared down at her. A look of suspicion.

"Relax doc. Can't a girl go to the bathroom in peace?" She smiled up at him. He lifted his hand to massage hi right temple.

"Elizabeth ..."

"Yes?"

"I suggest you have Gwen hang out with you for a few days. In fact make that a few weeks."

"Why?"

"Because ... anymore time with her father and his personality will rub off on her indefinitely."

Elizabeth burst out laughing. "I'll take it into consideration." She brought her hand up to stifle her ongoing laughter.

"Hey ... it's not that funny." John pulled her closer to him. Her breath immediately catching at their close proximity to each other. It didn't matter to her that they had been married for the past four months. No matter what this man – Colonel John Sheppard – was always going to have this effect on her. Even with their child growing in her womb, she couldn't help but blush at his closeness. The teenage crush that would never go away. The love that would last – here, now and forever.

"I love you." John stared down into his beautiful wife's eyes.

"I love you too." He brushed his lips against hers, barely grazing their surface.

"Oh ... come on you two. Not here. I can't leave ... you can." Gwen slid under her 'safety against viewing parent PDA' covers. "I'm going to be scared for life." She whined.

This only caused her parents to both stared at her hidden form and laugh. "Sorry, Gwen." He walked over to her and pulled the covers down. "We'll stop."

"She needs her rest anyways. Her lungs took a beating today. I'm surprised the smoke from the wild fire didn't do more damage. On top of that, this new found ability of hers," he was clearly talking about the one that saved John's life, "has exhausted her body physically and mentally. So say your goodnights and off with ya. I'll talk to you both in a few minutes about Elizabeth's check up earlier."

"Thanks Carson." Elizabeth walked up to the side of Gwen's bed and leaned as far down as she could to kiss her on the top of the head. "Sleep well. I love you. I couldn't ask for a better daughter."

"And I couldn't ask for better parents." John snuck in and leaned in close.

"Gwen ..." He wanted to say more, but felt that now wasn't the time. I'll take her to the place I took Elizabeth to on our first date tomorrow. I'll talk to her then. "I love you and I'm more proud of you than I've ever been in my whole life. You showed great courage today. And for that I will always be eternally thankful. And proud to call you my daughter.

"I love you too dad. I'll see you both in the morning." She watched as they both walked out, John placing his hand protectively around Elizabeth.

_You can't say you're not attached now._

It's not fair. But I still know what I have to do. I have four months left until I'm nineteen. Two more after that until ...

_It's okay ... you don't have to think about that now. You still have time._

I just wish it didn't hurt so much. Gwen paused for a moment. There's something that I haven't been able to get out of my head though.

_What are you thinking?_

If I hadn't been there ... would he have died? I mean ... he almost did right? If I hadn't been there ... would the whole day have gone differently?

_Possibly. Time's a very complicated thing. It's infinite. It's confusing. And it has many loop holes – many different realities. Remember ... you tripped today. And Rodney complained the whole way there – stalling everyone. The team was late in departing for the planet by ten minutes. All of those things could have been contributed to the Wraith spotting you at the time that they did. If you had left when scheduled, if Rodney hadn't stalled, if you hadn't fallen ..._

So you're saying it's my fault he almost died?

_No ... what I'm saying is you'll never know if he would have or wouldn't have died. There are too many factors that play into time's design. No one will ever fully comprehend it's complexity. _

Okay. So what now?

_I don't know about you, but I'm ready for a little sleep. It's been a long day. _

You're telling me. She yawned.

_I'll take that as a yes._

Yup. And with that Gwen shut her eyes welcoming slumber.

* * *

"So, I'm sure you both know everything's fine. If it weren't ... well ..." He pointed to the sleeping eighteen year old just inside. "Gwen would probably be the first to know. But everything seems to be fine. It's a girl by the way." Carson smiled sheepishly. 

"Yeah yeah, we know that. So how is she doing?" John pointed down at the woman sitting down in front of him.

"Elizabeth is doing extremely well. A little more rest and a little less work wouldn't kill her though."

"Okay, well then with that settled I believe it's bed time for you." John said while helping Elizabeth out of her chair.

"What ... I don't even get to eat first?" She said coyly.

"Okay, so well stop by the cafeteria and grab some food. But then ..."

"John it's barely seven thirty. I'm not tired."

"Okay so food, then we'll relax in the comfort of our bed with the new goose down blankets sent from Earth ... and then ..."

Carson laughed amusingly at the two leaders walking casually out of his office. "They really were meant for each other."

Sorry it's another short chapter. Hope you liked it all the same. Let me know what you think? What you think is going on? What's good? What's bad? Please Review. Your comments and suggestions and ongoing encouragement is always appreciated. Enjoy!


	18. Rain Means More Than One Thing

He couldn't help but stare. The way the sun's rays snuck in through their window. Cascading down upon her sleeping form. The light giving him the impression that she was glowing even more than she ever had been during her pregnancy. It had been eight months. And a wonderful eight months at that. After they discovered Gwen's new found ability, things had gone surprisingly smooth. No more near death experiences needed to be thwarted by his daughter.

It amazed him still how much she really did look like Elizabeth. He should have noticed it in the beginning. But ... he wasn't really paying that much attention to what she looked like. Just that he thought he was going crazy. Funny. If someone had told him then that his hallucinations were in fact a holographic projection of his future daughter who was somehow sent back in time after their untimely death ... well ... weirder things have happened. But it's safe to say that he probably would have thought they were the ones who were going nuts.

He brushed a stray curl behind her ear. Admiring her swollen stomach. That was their daughter. He still had a hard time believing he was going to be a father. Or that he was one. More so that the woman he was having this child with was none other than Dr. Elizabeth Weir – or at least Elizabeth Sheppard now – the leader of Atlantis. Three months ago that seemed like it would be a problem. Or at least he thought General Landry and the President would have a problem with it. The look on Landry's face ... wow. That was worth a million bucks.

They had been conversing back and forth with Earth on a regular basis; only thing was for the past first five months of Elizabeth's pregnancy she hadn't been present for those conversations. Thus John never mentioned to SG1 that she was pregnant. It just wasn't something that popped into a conversation.

_Well there haven't been anymore problems with the generators sir. Rodney and Zelenka pretty much took care of that situation. In between that and the new program we have going for regular sparring lessons with Teyla and Ronon – we thought it would be a good idea to have the scientists at least know some sort of defense – and with the new crops we've harvested on the mainland things are going very smoothly. Oh and did I forget to tell you that I got married about four months ago. Yeah, it was great. Elizabeth and I are really happy and ... surprise ... she's now five months pregnant. How's that for news?_

Yep, that wasn't a conversation he wanted to have. So he ignored it and just didn't say anything. I mean ... he would eventually but now ... it just wasn't the right time.

Then they got a message from SG1 early than their initial meeting time. Landry wanted to talk about something confidential. Or at least that's what he said over the transmission. He asked John to contact him in ten minutes for a live transmission via video.

I thought okay ... what could he possibly want to talk about. And then there in front of the control room he asked, 'Colonel ... is there something that you want to tell me?'

'Not that I can think of sir.' What an idiot. Why in hell would I say that? I should have just said, actually there is something. Then maybe just maybe he wouldn't have come down so hard. Maybe just maybe he wouldn't have shown me the video that SG1 analyzed from our last transmission. Then maybe just maybe the General wouldn't have had to find out about Elizabeth's pregnancy through a video.

Yeah, that's right. Live footage. And it wasn't like she was standing still either. I mean, I didn't even see what the General was pointing out to me on the screen. That is ... until he did a freeze frame on me and then a close up on a very pregnant very, much the leader of Atlantis, Dr. Elizabeth Weir. Yeah, that was about when I died. Right then and there. I had to explain in great detail why I had neglected to tell him about the pregnancy and the marriage and Gwen. But you know what ... it was okay. Because like I told him then, they could fire me, let me go, court marshal me. I didn't care. I'd quit if I had to. I was happy with Elizabeth. Happy for the first time in a long time. I wasn't going to walk away from that. Or feel ashamed.

That's when he said, 'Colonel, I'm not talking about why you neglected to inform us of this ... even though we were a little shocked - that word actually doesn't fit appropriately for this situation. We were ... it was unexpected. However, the President and I agree you both deserve a little break. I'm talking about the fact that I didn't get so much as an invitation, yet alone a courtesy call.'

Oh.

So it hadn't turned out all that bad.

He was startled out of his nostalgic state by the groan that escaped his wife. "Good morning." He brushed the curls off to the side of her face once again. Placing a kiss on her smiling lips.

"Good morning to you too."

"You ready for our trip today?"

The puzzled expression that took over her face was a sign that so far his plan was going accordingly.

"What trip?"

"Well, it's ten o'clock right now, and if you start getting ready I'd say..." He looked at the clock resting on top of their night stand. "We should be ready to go oh I don't know ... it might be two o'clock by the time you're ready." He smiled at her with a playful glint in his eyes.

She punched him in the stomach. He gasped for air as the wind got knocked out of him. He had not been expecting that.

"Ow ... what was that for?"

"That Colonel Sheppard was for poking fun at your poor wife."

"Awe ... you know what I mean. Beside, I would never poke fun at my poor wife. I love my poor wife." He said teasingly.

"Well, in that case ..." She kissed him tenderly. He pulled her closer to him. Or at least as close as he could considering their unborn child played a part in making actually getting closer to her difficult.

What started out as a soft gentle kiss soon turned into one of passion and need. He broke away out of breath before they could go any further. Not that he didn't want to ... but there would be time for that later. Right now his main objective was to get her dressed and ready to go. He had a surprise for her.

"John ..." She stared up at him confused.

"Trust me." He stood up and helped her off of their bed. "Get dress, I'll meet you in the control room in about an hour or so." And with that he rushed out of their room, making sure to stop off at Rodney's before heading toward the mess hall.

* * *

When he first saw her he could have sworn it was Elizabeth. The way she was standing with her arms crossed like that. The wind blowing her long graceful curls about her face. The way she leaned her head back opening up herself to the rays of the sun. In everyway, she is Elizabeth. He would have mistaken her for her mother if it hadn't been for her flat stomach. A clear sign to the truth. No, it was his daughter.

He had found her like that about a week after it happened. She was just standing there. Only she was leaning against the railing for support. Her head was down low. And it was pouring rain. Not exactly a sight a father wants to see.

Flashback

_It was _ _midnight_ _Elizabeth__ was back in the comfort of their room waiting for him to bring back the chocolate ice cream from the cafeteria. However before that stop, she told him she wanted her laptop. Which happened to be sitting on her desk. So begrudgingly he went. Even though it was _ _midnight__. Even though he was dead tired from the day's mission. He went._

_And as the lightning flashed while he was heading down the Atlantean steps rushing to get back, he saw her. Just standing out there. Getting soaked. _

"_What in the hell?" He set the laptop down and ran out to her._

_For some reason she couldn't pull herself away. She had said good night to them both. Smiled reassuringly and then left. She was going to her room, but for some reason didn't end up there. Her feet had dragged her back to her spot. Their spot. The one her parents loved to go to. To think. To get away. She had been standing out there for hours. Never truly realizing that the weather had gone from misty to pouring. She didn't know when the thunder and lightning started. Only that their chatter drowned out her shouts of pain. _

_She just couldn't understand. Didn't want to understand. How could something so wonderful be such a lie? She had changed so much already. Her future – their future – was already starting to change because of her presence. She never expected it to be like this. How could she? There wasn't a rule book for situations such as these. No guide. Just choices that she had to make. Paths that she had to choose. Whether they were right or wrong – she'd never know until it was too late. _

_But if she hadn't been there …what then. That's what kept her out here. That's why she hadn't retreated inside once the storm started. What would have happened?_

"_Gwen what in the hell are you doing out here? It's pouring out come on …" He placed his hand on her shoulder. _

_She hadn't even heard the doors open behind her. The sound of the drops of rain hitting the ground and the clatter of thunder drowning out any other noise._

"_I can't." She just kept staring blankly ahead at the crashing waves below._

"_What do you mean you can't? Of course you can." He tried to pull her away from the railing, but she wouldn't let him._

"_No! I can't!" He spun her around to face him. If he hadn't looked closely he wouldn't have seen them. The rain washed them away as they slipped down her cheeks. But even underneath the cover of the rain … he could see them. Tears. Her tears._

"_Gwen, why are you out here?" He voice turning solemn._

"_You almost died because of me." He could see her shaking._

"_What are you talking about? Last week. None of that was your fault. Why would you think otherwise!"_

"_You never would have been in that situation if it weren't for me. My being here is putting you all at risk! I never should have come!" She looked down at the ground. Afraid to meet his gaze. Afraid of what she'd see. "I'm so sorry."_

"_Gwen … don't you ever think that! Do you hear me! You are the bravest person that I know. You risked everything to get here. You waited over a thousand years just to come here. And to what? To stand out here in the rain tempting fate to take you back! No! Gwen Sheppard … you came here to save us. To save your family. And not only that … if it hadn't been for you I would have died on that mission. I would have died to leave you and your mother alone. You saved me Gwen. You're here for a reason. You're here because we want you here. We need you. Not because we need your abilities. Not because we need you to save us. Although those things are pluses …" He saw her face light up a bit at that. "But because we love you. Elizabeth and I … we couldn't dream of living without you." He placed his hand under her chin and lifted it up to meet his gaze. "None of this is your fault. Do you understand me?"_

_The walls she had been slowly building up the moment she got here crumbled as he wrapped his arms around her. "You're more than I could have ever wanted in a daughter." He whispered into her ear as he stroked her back and pulled her closer to him. In his arms she felt safe. Safer than she had ever felt before. This was her father._

"_I love you Gwen."_

"_I love you too dad."_

End Flashback

* * *

This time when the doors slide open she heard his foot steps approaching.

"Hey kiddo … almost ready?"

"That depends on whether or not you succeeded on your part."

"Is that doubt I hear."

"No … you just have a record for …"

"For what?"

"Nothing." She laughed at the flyboy smile that he flashed. It was the same as the first day that she had met them. Se had come to find that it wasn't one he showed too often. Just one that was shared with the ones he loved. Mostly for her mother. "So?"

"So what?"

"Is she coming?"

"Oh right … I told her to meet me here in the control room …" He glanced at his watch. "Well … she should be here in about thirty minutes. Is everything set?"

"Yeah, it's all in jumper one. You didn't tell her I was coming did you."

"No … I thought I'd leave that part a surprise."

"That part. What part of this isn't a surprise?'

"Oh, haha. You know … you really are hanging around Rodney too much. I think he's …"

"Don't you dare say it." She pointed her finger at him warningly.

He lifted his hands up into the air in defeat. "I wouldn't dream of it." He said backing away out through the doors which he came. "Be ready to go." He turned around hastily. "He really is rubbing off on her."

"Hey … I heard that."

Sorry this chapter took so long to update. Hope you all enjoyed it. It gets more complicated later on. There's some Sheppard and Elizabeth ... there's an ... and a ... and someone ... well, I guess you'll just have to see for yourself what lies ahead. Keep reading. And reviewing. Leave suggestions. Kristeen did and helped me to get past my writer's block. You never know when you might help too. So please review. As always it's appreciated. Enjoy!


	19. Perfect Day

"So … are you going to at least tell me where we're going? You know … since you had me pack all this stuff up while you casually slept in." She looked over at her father who was anxiously stuffing the rest of the things he had brought down from the mess hall into the overhead compartment of the jumper.

"I think I said I wanted it to be a surprise. And I didn't exactly sleep in, I was waiting for …" He said glaring up at her.

"You slept in. Don't give me the excuse that you were just watching her sleep. And come on. Not even a little hint. I swear I won't tell her."

"You know … it's not that I don't trust you … actually scratch that. I don't trust you. She's your mother. You tell each other everything. Don't you remember just last week, during guys' poker night you popped in on us. And I asked you if you had overheard our conversation?" John stopped packing up the blanket and gave her his full attention. "Remember what you told me?" He stared accusingly.

"Maybe." She tried to sound innocent, but it was hopeless.

"Maybe … well let me refresh your faulty memory. You said, and I quote, 'Nope … not a word.' And knowing how you are, I said and I quote, 'Don't go repeating any of it to your mother or Teyla. Or any women on base for that matter.' You'd imagine how surprised we were when, not even 24 hours later; word had already spread like wild fire. So not only did your mother know, but the whole expedition knew. Now do you remember?"

"Yeah, well when you put it that way." She paused staring at the ground then her face lit up and she looked back up at him. "So not even a little hint?"

"Gwen Matilda Sheppard! I said no. It's a surprise." He frustratingly sat down.

"Matilda?" She stared at him the way Teyla and Ronon do when they're confused as to why Rodney would call them Xena and Conan. "Pull that out of thin air did you?"

"Couldn't think of anything else."

"So you chose Matilda?" She was still staring down at him like he must have been crazy. "Matilda?"

"Who's Matilda?" John looked up as Gwen spun around to greet Elizabeth as she slowly walked up into the jumper.

"What are you doing here? We were going to meet in the gate room at 11:00."

"Well … if you'd look at the watch strapped to your wrist, you'd see that it's 11:15. Lorne was up in the control room. He said he saw you head down this way."

"Now look what you did. Your questions distracted me and she had to walk all the way here. I was late. Thanks."

"Why don't you go cry about it." She smirked as he stuck his tongue out at her. All the while Elizabeth was watching them from the sidelines amused at the father – daughter interaction. "Now look who's staring to sound like Rodney."

"Hey … let's not go there. You wouldn't want me …"

"Not go there. You went there earlier. AFTER I told you not to. So why can't …"

"I'll tell you why. I'm the adult. You're supposed to be listening to me. There's a little expression. Respect your elders. Maybe you could …"

"Respect my elders? You're not my elder, you're a kid trapped inside the body of a … what are you like 40 something?" She stared at him in triumph.

"Forty something? Did you just say 40 something?"

"John …" His attention turned back to Elizabeth. "Not that I don't like seeing our daughter verbally oust you , but if you wouldn't mind kindly telling me where exactly we're going, I'd greatly appreciate it."

"He won't tell you. Says it's a surprise."

"Now I know where she inherits her impatience from." John smiled into his wife's eyes.

"Impatient … me? I'm just here because you told me to meet you in the gate room. Which, if you're forgetting, you weren't only late to, but in fact you never showed up. And you're calling me impatient now because you woke me up, when I could still be sleeping, all so that I would end up asking Lorne where you were. Where I would then proceed to watch you and our eighteen year old daughter go at it. And you're still standing there bemused as to what you should be doing." She looked over at Gwen. "What is that? Mom – 5? Gwen – 4? And John … what is it? 0?"

"Dad … in the wise words of Ronon Dex. I think you were just … what is it you people say? Burned?" Elizabeth cracked a smile which turned into a fit of giggles soon followed shortly by the sound of Gwen joining in.

"Alright you two. Laughing at the expense of whatever dignity I have left is officially over. Are you both ready to go now?"

"I've been ready since I got here." John walked over to her and pulled her to the front of the jumper. Kissing her on her forehead before pointing for her and Gwen to sit down.

"Then I guess it's time to go." He is taking his family out for a day of relaxation and fun. Something that was well deserved after everything they'd been through.

Too bad what waited for them was far from fun and far from relaxing.

* * *

"So where are we going?"

"Geez, you both are annoying as hell. You know that?"

"Yes, well you love both of us all the same."

"We're almost there. Another five minutes. I swear."

"You said five minutes … well … five minutes ago." Gwen was obviously bored.

"Well … I lied. So five minutes."

"How do I know you're not lying now?"

"Well, I guess you'll just have to trust me."

Elizabeth laughed at this remark. Trust him. That was a phrase she heard a little more than she'd wanted to. Expect each time he uttered those words, he was either going to do something really stupid … or … no stupid pretty much summed it up.

Exactly five minutes later, John landed the puddle jumper next to the entrance of a cave.

Elizabeth looked from the cave to John's face questionably. "John? You do remember what happened last time you took me to cave right? The Wraith. The storm."

"How could I forget. That night … well it's not exactly one that I can forget. Or that I'd want to. Especially since …" He looked over at Gwen and then back at Elizabeth taking her hand. "You know." He smiled.

"Yes, I know."

Gwen looked at the both of them for a moment. Only barely catching the side ways glances her parents kept giving her. What the heck were they talking about? A storm. A cave. The Wraith. Those three things had nothing in common. Then she saw John and Elizabeth look over at her again.

"What is .." Then it hit her. "Oh gross! That's … eww." Gwen opened the back hatch. Ready to get away from this awkward conversation. Her parents. "Oh … thank you so very much. As if I wasn't already scared enough as it is." Then they were alone.

"I think she took that quite well. Don't you?" She playfully pushed him away from her all the while giggling.

"You have a way with words John Sheppard. And even though I appreciate you for it … I don't think our daughter shares in that appreciation." She lightly kissed him on the lips. "Now, what exactly are we doing at the entrance to this cave?"

"You'll see." Was his coy response.

* * *

She should have been used to it by now. The comments. The affection. The kissing and the hugging. But no matter how many times she had witnessed it, she never … and she meant would never get used to parental PDA.

The sky was crystal clear. A little breeze danced about the trees. Causing the grass below her feet to chase after its call. She fiddled with the sweet smelling floral in her grasp, marveling the pastel colors of lavender and blue.

There were taking forever. What could be taking them … never mind. She didn't want to know. Just then the jumper cloaked and they came strolling out of nothingness, smiles plastered on their faces.

"Have a good time embarrassing your teenage daughter?" She stared at them accusingly.

"You know …" John ran his left hand through his hair – his right currently occupied around Elizabeth's waist. "Technically she's a young adult now. Buy cigarettes. Win the lotto. Yep, doors just fly open at eighteen." A sarcastic undertone accompanied the last sentence.

"Don't forget she can vote."

Gwen looked to her mother. "Well, then the moment we decide to take a vote for another military leader let me know. I'll be happy to vote for the other guy."

"Oh haha. Now turn around and start walking."

"If you're trying to get me to go in there …" She glanced back over her shoulder at the dark cave entrance. "Well, you're highly mistaken in thinking I would even set foot in a place like that."

"Trust me."

There were those magical words again. Trust him. The man who can't go on one off – world mission without getting into trouble along the way. The man who stares trouble in the face and dares it to make a move. Trust him. That should be easy.

John took out three flashlights and gave each of them one. "John how far are we going to walk exactly?" Elizabeth looked at him quizzically. "If you haven't noticed …" She stared down at her expanding stomach. "Well … it's not as easy to get around as fast."

"Don't worry. I'm the last person who would want to put you .. Or the baby in danger. Beside … Carson said it wouldn't kill you to rest more, or sleep more for that matter. So sleeping in we did. Don't say anything Gwen." She raised both her arms up in the air in defense. "And now, we're going to relax." He pointed his flashlight into the cave. "It's just really dark. The other side is blocked off to the sunlight so it just looks like it goes on forever. But there's an exit. I swear. Five, ten minutes at the most, and then you'll be sitting down under the shade listening to the calming sound of …"

She waited for a response. "Of what John?"

"I'd rather you see for yourself." He pleaded with her with his puppy dog eyes. A move she could never resist.

"Lead the way, Colonel."

"Gladly." And so he did.

The cave wasn't that bad. Dark. Musty. It was a cave just like any other. Sure enough ten minutes after entering they came to a dead end. All that she could see were vines growing out of the rock wall. Nothing else. "John … I thought you said …"

"What did I say earlier?"

"Trust you."

"Okay …" With that he moved aside the vines to reveal a door. "See … not all my plans are faulty. After you …" He opened.

"Wait …" Gwen looked up at him in confusion. "Is that running water?" Elizabeth listened intently. Sure enough she could hear a low rumble.

"Why don't you step through the door and see." John opened it and immediately the area was filled with a light mist. Elizabeth stepped out first. The view before her taking her breath away. There falling from above was a vibrant waterfall. A path was etched into the ground she stood upon that safely led her out into the open. Upon seeing the view from the outside words left her. "John … this …" The foliage that surrounded this lake, this cascade … it was lush and flourishing. The flora was stunning. Splashes of color tinted the mountain side. "How did you find this place? The door … the falls?"

"Speaking of doors. How'd you know that was there?"

"I don't remember reading about this place in one of your mission reports."

"At the time it didn't seem like it was 'need to know material.' Plus I told Rodney that if he valued his life he wouldn't bring this place up or mention it in any reports. I wanted to bring you here, but I didn't want you to know about it."

"But I never would have known this was here if you had both put it in the reports. That still doesn't explain why you …"

" Elizabeth. What's the first thing you read on the mission reports?"

"The address."

"Right. So are you telling me that when you saw me dial the address you didn't remember every aspect of those reports? Because I know you. You store away details for future reference. You remember everything. If I had mention that there was a secret door to a hidden lagoon …"

"I would have know what you were planning from the moment you dialed the address." She smiled up at him.

"Precisely."

"So this is what you meant? Wow … you weren't kidding when you said it was a sight you'd never forget." John looked at her perplexed.

"What are you talking about? I never said that … wait just one minute young lady. You mean to tell me you went in without asking me? After I specifically said no. I told you it was a surprise."

"I didn't do it on purpose. I just really wanted to know. It's not like I pried purposefully. It just happened. I was thinking how much I wanted to know and then bang. The next thing I knew I could hear you. But your lips weren't moving. You left in the transporter before I ever figured out where we were going anyways. I only heard the whole thing about how we'd never forget." She could tell he was still on edge. "Sorry."

"Don't worry Gwen. He'll get over it." Elizabeth laughed.

"Hey. Whose side are you on?"

"My own. I can't pick and chose between the two of you. The side without me would lose."

"Oh … well then in that case I'm on my own side too."

"Okay Colonel." She was still smiling up at him. "So how'd you find this place?"

"Oh right. Well, there's a village a few miles from here. One of the leaders, Mica, he showed us this place the third day. Said something about bringing loved ones here. I wasn't really paying that much attention. Anyways, he showed me. I contacted him two days ago to ask him again about the location. Wanted to make sure I was positive on the location. Told him about my plan. And here we are."

And here they were indeed. An hour later after lying under the shade of a near by tree, Elizabeth and John both fell asleep. Exhaustion taking over.

* * *

Gwen walked out from the water's edge. Staring down at her slumbering parents. It was a scene that she had come to appreciate. Just being able to watch them sleep. Knowing that they were safe. There were things in this timeline that had changed because of her presence here. But nothing drastic. Rodney had warned her after John's incident that she needed to be careful. That she couldn't alter too much because there could be a chain reaction. But in all honesty her very presence had caused many chain reactions. She was the one who had told them about the ancient ruins, about this planet's agricultural advantages, about many other things. And each visit to these places including this one would have never happened if she hadn't spoken up. Her and her parents wouldn't be here today, relaxing and enjoying each others company if it weren't for her. Nothing bad had happened yet. What could possibly go wrong after a day like this?

After sleeping for a good two hours, they both awoke. John stretched while he sat up. Elizabeth just watched him. "What?"

"Nothing. Just watching." She yawned even though she had just woken.

"Okay … I think it's time to pack up and head out. Come on." He helped to pull her to her feet. "It's getting late." He claimed her lips gently and then looked around for Gwen.

There she was at the water edge reading away. Something that she had inherited from her mother. Her love for literature. He yelled for her. "Gwen … we're packing up. You ready?"

"Yep." She stood up gathering up her book and the blanket she had been sitting on.

* * *

Moments later they were heading back down the path that led to the secret door just beyond the waterfall. John turned the knob and ushered his family in.

"Gwen can you run up ahead and get the jumper started?"

"Really?"

"Yeah … I want to get us back as soon as possible. It's getting late."

"Yes! Finally I get to fly the jumper for more than ten minutes."

"Yeah … well this is a once in a lifetime opportunity. Don't screw it up."

"I won't. I won't." Gwen ran up ahead. John and Elizabeth could still see her as she got closer and closer to the light up ahead.

* * *

"Be quiet. Can't you hear? Someone's coming. Get ready. We have to get this right the first time. Taylor what's our status?"

"The charge is set sir. You just have to detonate it."

"Alright. Colman …" He looked to his second. "You grab her the first chance you get. This needs to be quick and clean."

"Yes sir."

"Mica's tip is a great advantage. We can't mess this up. You know they require at least one per month. They will be pleased that she is a Sheppard. It will stave off the cullings for another month."

"Sir … will they be angry that we took out Colonel Sheppard and Weir?"

"No. They just want them out of the way."

* * *

She was at the entrance again about to step back out into the sunlight. Unaware of what lay ahead.

"Hey Gwen!" John yelled out to her. She turned in their direction. He could only see her outline because of the sunlight behind her. "Have fun." He knew she'd be smiling. He squeezed Elizabeth's hand. He still couldn't believe he was letting her fly the thing.

"She'll be fine. She learned from the best. Remember?"

"That's what I'm afraid of."

"Go now while she's not looking." Colman shot up and bolted for the target.

As John looked down at Elizabeth's illuminated face his view was suddenly blocked. No light. "What the …" He looked back up ahead. Gwen was still standing there staring at them. And there just behind her was a dark figure. He shouted at her. Told her to run. Who knew what it was. A Wraith. A man. All he knew was they were running for his daughter. He heard Elizabeth gasp. Remembered running toward Gwen. Pulling his gun out from its holster by his side. He had remembered what happened last time, he and Elizabeth had left without anything to protect them. The Wraith came. He knew better now. Was prepared to protect his family.

* * *

She had seen his reaction to whatever was behind her. Heard the terror in his voice. Saw him running for her. Her mother making her way toward her as well. Then she turned. That's when she remembered. The dream. Running. Trying to get away.

_She was running down a long corridor. Darkness slowly closing in on her. She wanted to stop ... but that wasn't an option. Not now, not ever. She was too close to her goal. And they were gaining on her. She let out a yelp, tripping over a stone tile in the floor that was protruding up. She could hear them getting closer. Almost at her back now. She stumbled to get up. Then he grabbed her from behind. It was over. She had lost. _

_"No!_"

Only now as the dream played out in reality there were a few differences. The corridor was in fact a dark tunnel. The tile she had tripped over was in fact an indentation in the floor. And as she struggled to get her bearings all the while getting up from the fall. As she felt him grab her around the waist and lift her into the air. As she screamed trying to get away. It hit her that the voice shouting no was not her own. It was her parents.

* * *

"Gwen!" And then as the sunlight hit her face, she saw it. The explosion that engulfed them.

"No!"

"We need to get moving! Tie her hands together. We don't want her giving us anymore trouble as it is."

No. No. This could be happening. They weren't dead. They couldn't be. She struggled to get lose.

"Hold still." The man who had taken her slapped her across the face. Said cheek turning red. "You saw how fast we killed your parents. Don't think that I won't think twice about doing the same to you!" He spat out.

No they weren't dead. They could be. Really they couldn't. Otherwise she wouldn't be here. She just hoped that they were all right.

Okay. So that wasn't the best ending. Sorry. I hope that you liked it all the same. Please let me know what you think. I need help, suggestions, comment, critiques. Please review. Help is greatly appreciated. Oh and Kristeen … this and the next few chapters are dedicated to you and your ideas that helped me get past my writer's block. Thanks. Enjoy. 


	20. What I Came Here To Do

I'll warn you now. Something ... well ... sort of sad happens in this chapter. I didn't want to tell any of you, for the sake of surprise, but I thought that I might mentally kick myself later if I received flames for not giving out fair warning. So there it is. Be warned. Angst. Or at least I tried. Possible death. You'll just have to read to find out. Again. Big Fat Warning! Now enjoy!

She remembered Gwen's terrified face as everything around her went dark. Heard John scream her name. Felt him push her out of the way. Then came deafening silence. John's still form was the last thing she saw as the darkness claimed her.

* * *

"No!" Gwen couldn't believe what had just happened. And she couldn't force herself to accept it. She needed to get help. Needed to get back to Atlantis. It was her only hope. Their only hope.

"Hold still!" Her captor grabbed her forcefully by her upper arm. She winced as he tightened his grip. A bruise would form as a reminder later. That is … if there even was a later. "We're moving out. They'll want her before nightfall."

Who was this 'they'? 'They'll' be happy she's a Sheppard. 'They'll' be happy her parents are dead. Who the hell is this 'they'? And what do they want with her?

"What are you going to do with me?" The men around her only laughed. They were amused by her helplessness. Her vulnerability.

"They'll be very pleased indeed." One of the younger men said with a gleam of iniquity in his eyes. "She wants her in one piece … if possible." He glared down at Gwen. He could see the disgust in her eyes. The fear.

"Who will be pleased? Who wanted my parents dead!" Colman only pushed her harder causing her to lose her balance and collapse to the solid ground.

She looked up at him. Distain apparent in her facial expressions. "Who are they?" Silence greeted her among the glares of the men before her. "Answer me!"

"They … are gods. They are powerful. They … as you so call them … are the Wraith." And with that he pulled her up by the arm and pushed her onward. "Now move."

"You're Wraith worshipers." It was said in hushed tones, but he heard her all the same. A devious smile appeared on his face. It chilled her to the bone.

Wraith worshipers. She should have realized before. The clothing. Their attitudes. The feeling they gave her in the pit of her stomach. It made her sick. She still didn't understand how anyone could tolerate, yet alone worship the Wraith. These people … they were among the category that Janus had described as pathetic. Misled. Hopeless. Disgusting. Those were only a few words that he had mentioned off of a list a mile long.

These people allied themselves with demons. Wraith worshippers could not be negotiated with. They had one goal in mind and one only. Serve and protect. The Wraith. In their minds, there was no other way. The Wraith would protect them. There would be no cullings. No feeding. They received food, shelter and protection for their services. In their eyes, they were right. They were the good guys. Just trying to live.

I have to get help. I have to get away. But the gate … it's … the jumper. I can fly the jumper. Now where did he … there. The imprint on the ground. I can't believe they haven't found it yet. If she was going to do this, now was the time. She pretended to fall. Hit the ground with a raucous thud. The men kept walking. Colman looked back and pointed for one of the men to keep her moving, but as the man came closer she kicked his legs out from under him. Giving herself the window of opportunity she needed. She pushed herself off of the ground starting off at a run. Almost there. Almost there.

"Stop her! We can't let her escape." The sergeant behind Colman fired his weapon. Bullets flying all around Gwen. "No you idiot! They want her alive and intact. If we have to explain why she's riddled with bullets … it'll be your head we present. Not hers. Now use the stunners!"

* * *

"Gwen!" The sudden jolt of Elizabeth's body set a sharp tingle through her lower back. Thinking she must have hurt it during the explosion she pushed aside the pain. Taking a deep breath she searched her surroundings.

The last thing she remembered was seeing her daughter's terrified face. Just as the walls around them started to crumble. That's when she remembered.

"John!" She frantically reached out. Searching for him. "Oh my God! John!" It was dark. Quiet. Too quiet. The silence was killing her. She called out for him. With no reply. She grew frantic. "John, please answer me!" Then she heard it. A moan. It was coming from in front of her. She tried to push herself off the ground. The pressure on her lower back slightly increased. Standing she placed her hand on the rock wall for support. "John?"

" Elizabeth?" His voice hushed. The groans that followed grew closer as she inched her way along the wall. "You alright?"

"I'm fine." She was rummaging through the pack she had found on the ground. Finding her goal she clicked the switch illuminating her surroundings. "Oh … John." She rushed toward him. Or at least as fast as she could in the last stage of her pregnancy. "Can you stand?"

He shook his head grimacing as he did so. There was a deep gash just above his brow line. She reached for the backpack pulling out the emergency medical kit. Cleaning the wound made him flinch a little. But he'd felt worse. In fact, the head laceration was the least of his worries. That was a dull ache in comparison to the other pain he was feeling at the moment.

"John … where else?" He knew she meant what else hurts. Injuries and such. But he really didn't want to worry her. From what little light illuminated the vicinity he could already tell that she was distressed. And the less stressed out she was the better. For her and the baby.

He shook his head. Which again caused the room to spin. "I'm fine." He closed his eyes in pain. She'd see right through him. Man, for not wanting to freak her out he sure was doing a crappy job.

"John." She looked at him pleadingly. "Where's it hurt? Don't lie to me. You're not doing anything that would help to calm me down. Now, come nightfall. If it isn't already, Teyla will send a team to look for us. They know we're here right?" He nodded another rush of nausea passing over him.

"Rodney, Ronon and Teyla know. For once I'm glad Rodney couldn't keep his big mouth shut." He coughed. His breath hitching in the process.

"Hey … take it easy. Slow breaths. You'll be fine. Everything's going to be fine. Just tell me where it hurts."

Smile spread across his tired face. "What's so amusing?" She looked at him curiously. How could anything about their current situation be humorous?

"Nothing. It's just … you're bedside manners improved." His smile beamed up at her.

"Well, as much as I hate to admit it … I have you to blame for that. I've had a lot of practice in that department thanks to you and your team."

"Yeah, about that …" His smile faded. His voice becoming solemn and serious. " Elizabeth …" tears began to well up in his eyes. His voice softened. "I'm sorry. You shouldn't have to go through this. I never should have …"

"John …" He closed his eyes. Sleep yearning to take over. "No John. Look at me. John … listen to me. You can't go to sleep. Not yet. And this is not you fault. Do you hear me? You couldn't have known. John …" He opened his eyes. Staring up at her determined expression. "Whoever those people are … they had a reason for what they did. And we are going to find out what it is together. You're going to be fine. I promise. I won't let anything happen to you."

"I should be saying that to you. Not the other way around. I'm supposed to protect you Elizabeth. You're my wife. You shouldn't have to protect me." Now she was crying.

"John … for all the times that you have been there." She thought of her battle with the nanites that tried to take over her body. Kolya's attempts on her life. Kavanaugh's rants on her person. "You've done so much. And never asked for anything in return. All the times you risked you life for me. You've never given up on me … on us. And I'm not going to give on you. Which mean that every once in awhile … I need to take care of you. I love you John." The tears were streaming down her cheeks now. "Now help me fights this. I'm not ready to lose you."

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry we're in this mess. I'm sorry for everything. I love you too. I just … I could never live with myself if anything were to happen to you. Or Gwen." He placed his hand on her expanding stomach. "I love both of you so much it hurts. I couldn't live without you."

She smiled down at him. "Everything's going to be fine. Now …"

He already knew what she was going to ask. He was getting drowsier by the minute. He knew he had a concussion. The fight to stay awake proved that. There was stabbing pain in his side. Probably a broke rib or two. And worst yet … he couldn't stand because of his leg. He could only assume that it was broken. That much was obvious. How badly … he wasn't sure. "You want the short version or the long version?" He gasped for air trying to stifle his amusement which immediately caused his lungs to burn. Note to self: laughing. Not a good idea.

"John?" She looked at him nervously.

"Broken ribs. One or two. Not sure." His breath was hitching again. And the desire to sleep was starting to take over even more so. "Legs broke. Possibly double fracture. Can't walk that's for sure. Head's pounding. Concussion. And beside that nothing really." He closed his eyes again. He was so tired he couldn't think straight.

"John … you need to stay awake." She grabbed his hand. "John, please. You need to keep your eyes open. Listen to my voice John. Please. You can't …" She immediately let go of his hand clutching her stomach. A sharp pain shot through her. Clamping her eyes shut she waded out the burning rushing through her.

The feel her warmth leaving his hand caused him to hazily open his eyes. Seeing her pained expression and the tensing of her abdomen he called out to her. " Elizabeth! Oh my God. What is it?"

She shook her head. Gasping as she did so. "Nothing. Just a kick." She rubbed her stomach smiling at John to try and reassure him. "I'm fine. I swear." He looked up at her worriedly, not sure if he should trust her answer. But he was in no condition to argue.

"I'll be right back. I'm going to go look for the other pack. There's still some water left and the picnic." She slowly stood. A twinge of pain causing her to tremble.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah." She turned around shining light in front of her. Once she was far enough away so that John couldn't see her, she eased herself down to the ground using the wall as her support. "This shouldn't be happening." She winced as yet another contraction hit. She rubbed her stomach to try and ease the pain that swept over her. "Why now? What are we going to do?" The pain subsided; she steadily rose to her feet, continuing to use the rock wall to maintain her balance.

I have to find the pack. We need all the resources we have left close by. If I could just get that backpack.

There.

She steadily picked up the pack flinching as she did so. The pressure had increased ten fold. How were they ever going to get out of this one? She was in no condition to start digging their way out, and John … well he wasn't any better. No, all they could do was wait and hope. Hope that help would come … in time.

* * *

She had made it to the jumper. And by the looks on their faces through the transparent window, they didn't know where she was. There was a burning sensation coursing through her, but time was short. She needed to get help. Needed to save them. Easing her way into the air, she flew for her way out. The gate wasn't far. She'd be back in Atlantis in no time. She was feeling dizzy. Nausea setting in. But she had to stay focused. Needed to get back. No time to spare. Adrenaline coursed through her.

"In-coming worm hole."

"IDC?" Teyla ran toward the control panel.

"It's Colonel Sheppard's."

"Lower the shield." Teyla then spoke into her radio. "Dr. Beckett?"

"Yes luv?"

"We are receiving Colonel Sheppard's IDC and …"

"I'll be right there."

* * *

"Where'd you go?" John looked at her puzzled.

"I needed to go find the other pack." She took out the remaining water supply. "Here. You need to drink this." She opened it and touched the end to his lips.

He shook his head. "You first." Pushed it away from his lips.

"John this is not the time for …"

"You first, or I'm not drinking."

She sighed. Taking the water back toward her own parched lips. He wasn't going to make caring for him easy.

"Happy?"

"Very." She lowered the canister toward his dry mouth. The first few sips caused him to sputter, but with her help he was able to keep the majority of it down.

He stared into her eyes. She took a deep breath and smiled unenthusiastically back at him. She looked tired. And she seemed to be drenched in perspiration. The twin trails that glistened her cheeks hinted at him that she had been crying.

" Elizabeth? How long?" She looked at him confused, but then it hit her. He knew.

"I'm fine. Nothing's wrong. I just want you to relax okay. Don't worry about me." She inched toward him cradling his head in her lap. "Do you think you can sit up?"

He stared at her a little angry that she wouldn't let him in. He knew that she was feeling the beginning stages of labor, but for how long this had been going on he wasn't sure. He also knew that until she was willing to open up, she wouldn't. She was stubborn in that way. Just like him. Take care of everyone else, and then worry about yourself. They were the same in that likeness.

"I can try. But don't freak if I shout out in agony." He smiled up at her humorously.

She just shook her head. "Not funny."

"Sorry." Then she started to help him slowly scoot back toward the near wall. It would give him the support that he needed.

At first it was just a deep burning sensation. He could handle that. But then … a searing pain ripped through him like someone was stabbing him continually. He couldn't help but to scream out in anguish.

She immediately stopped and gathered herself up. Trying to maneuver her way around to the front of John. Rising a little faster than she should have. As she stood upright she was shattered by pain that wracked her body. She cried out in agony and fell back to the floor. Elizabeth was on her knees, breathing heavily, holding her stomach.

* * *

As the jumper inched its way out of the event horizon Teyla couldn't help but let the smile she'd been holding in conquer her features. They were home. "Colonel Sheppard, we'll meet you in the jumper bay." Teyla started walking down the Atlantean steps, only to stop midway as the jumper slowly lowered to the ground. Making a loud thud that resonated throughout the room as in touched the floor. "Colonel?" She pressed her forefinger to her ear piece.

When the jumper door opened and Gwen came stumbling out Teyla rushed toward her. "Dr. Beckett! We need immediate medical assistance!"

He rushed in through the main hallway. "I'm here, is he …" But the injured wasn't who he thought it would be. In fact it was the complete opposite. "Gwen … oh dear lord."

She was breathing heavily, coming in short spurts. Gasps. It was becoming harder and harder to go on. "We … have to get back. Worshippers. Explosion. Cave in … they're trapped." She was hyperventilating now. The breaths came far too short in between. She didn't have enough time to catch her breath. "The Wraith … wanted them dead. Needed revenge. I can't … Carson …" Then she collapsed to her knees, crying out in shock and in pain. The burning sensation had intensified ten fold.

Ronon and Rodney came up from behind. Seeing Gwen's trembling form Ronon immediately started asking questions. "Who did this?"

Gwen looked up into his eyes. They were filled with hate. Love. Compassion. He was family. She shook her head. Staring blankly ahead. "Wraith worshippers." She gasped for air.

"Ronon help me get her to the infirmary." He complied and bent down to pick her up, but what he noticed made him back away immediately. " Carson … her hands." He stared unwilling to look away. Afraid if he left or took his gaze off of her for one minute, she'd disappear.

Carson should have seen it when she first arrived. But he was so focused on her eyes. On seeing what had happened. On where John and Elizabeth were that he hadn't … considered moving aside the jacket folds that concealed her side. But as he pushed away its folds and heard cry out, saw the tears well up and fall fear gripped him like never before.

There was blood. Everywhere. It was soaking through her dark jacket. The crimson color of her blood staining all that it touched. Seeping through. Her face was shockingly pale. The color red painted her hands.

"We need to get her to the infirmary immediately!" He looked to Ronon again.

But when Ronon went to pick her up, she protested. "No. Carson … there's no time." She shook her head from side to side. "They need you now. More than I do. John … I could feel his pain. And Elizabeth … mom and dad … they both need you more than I need you."

"Gwen … you've lost a lot of blood. You're not listening to reason. Ronon please."

"No." Gwen held Ronon back with sheer force of will. "Please. Carson. This wound. It's fatal. You know that. I know that. I'm not leaving this room …" She coughed, gasping for air yet again. As she removed her unused hands from over her mouth blood stained her lips.

"Gwen … look at me." He placed his hand gently under her chin. "If I don't operate now, you're going to die." His eyes were pleading with her.

"I'm already going to die Carson. I'm bleeding out and internally. I can fell myself slipping away. Yes, you might very well save me. You're a wonderful doctor. The best. But … the time that it would take you to … Carson …" she pushed his hand away. "They don't have that time. I'm sorry." She pushed them all away. Teyla, Ronon, Rodney and Carson. Keeping them at a distance. "It's too late for me. But not for them."

" Carson … do something!" Rodney was panicking. She was not going to die. This wasn't happening. How could it be? He didn't want to lose her. Not now, not ever.

Gwen looked into his eyes sympathetically. "Rodney … you've been an amazing uncle. And I know that you'll continue to be an amazing uncle. I just want you to know that I've enjoyed every moment spent with you in your lab. Every equation. Every experiment. You've taught me so much. And for that …" He breath caught in her throat, but not due to her injuries or the fact that time for her was running out, but because inside her heart. Her soul was breaking. She loved these people. They were her family. "I will be eternally grateful."

"Teyla …" She turned her attention to the Athosian woman before her. Tears slipping down her cheeks. "You're like the aunt I never had. My second mother. You've taught me how to be brave. How to live in world where … there is never a dull moment. I've been able to go to you whenever I needed anything. Advice. Wisdom. Or the occasional sparring lesson." She couldn't control the tears that were hazing her vision. "I love you."

"And Ronon …" He had been staring down at the ground, but as his name left her lips he jerked his head up to look at her. These moments were precious. "You have showed me what it means to love. To protect. You serve fully devoted. Wanting nothing more but to keep all that you love, consider family, safe. I will never forget you. You have taught me much about life. And the people in it."

"And Carson … you were there when no one else was. In the beginning, when I had a secret that would change everything. That did change everything. You were there when I needed to talk. You were there to listen. And I will never … and could never forget that. What you've all done for me … is far greater than anything I've ever accomplished on my own. I came here with one thing on my mind. To save them. My parents. To create a future for myself worth living, but you all changed that. I got to experience more. Live more, than I ever have in my whole life. You showed me what a true family is. What love really is. Family isn't necessarily biological. It's the people in your life that help you grow. Learn. Love. The people that care about you. I came searching for my family. I never suspected that I'd find more than that. I love you all so very much."

They all were staring at her now. Realizing what was about to happening. Sometime during Gwen's words to them, Ronon and Teyla ended up in each others embrace. Comforting each other. And Rodney was weeping like a baby. Only there was no noise. Just the sight of tears trickling down the faces.

"Please. Tell them it's not their fault. Tell them it was my choice. It's been made clear to me that I was never supposed to protect them from the Wraith. Or at least not in that sense. In my time period … we never met Michael. Many things … decision … have changed the way things are. Or how they were. This is what I'm supposed to do. I know that now. The dreams. Everything points to this. Just tell them … it was quick. Painless. Tell them … I love them with all my heart. And I always will. Teyla … tell them I'm not really gone. Rodney, tell them this is just the beginning. Ronon, I need you to tell John that this was by no means his fault. Make sure he knows that. No matter what he mustn't feel any guilt. This was my choice. And Carson … when I'm born tell John and Elizabeth to visit the planet where we were first attack by the Wraith. The one where dad was shot. You know. When he …"

"When you healed him. The planet with the ancient ruins."

She nodded. "Yes … there's an inscription upon the wall. It'll tell them how to get inside. There's a chest. More like tomb. Tell him he'll understand once he opens it."

She looked up as if someone had said her name. And then her gaze went back to the family she had come to know. "I have to go now. But … don't ever forget me. This me. I love you. So very much. And I'll miss you. All of you." As she took in her last breath a blinding light took hold of her still form and as it dissipated all that was left behind was her blood soaked clothes and the blue crystal that hung from her neck.

I'm so, so unbelievably sorry for how long this took me to write. Among other things such as work. I've been at a road block with this particular chapter. I hope that you all like it. Despite my yearning to delete it and write it over. I don't really like it. I feel I could have done better. Then again, I always think I can do better. What do you think? Did I give Gwen justice? Oh wow … one thing's for sure. As I was killing her off (writing her last words) I felt tears coming on. I literally thought I was going to cry. Really. Anyways. I'm guessing one or two more chapters tops. We'll see. This story is slowly coming to an end. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. Please keep it up. Read. But especially review. The help is always appreciated. Enjoy! 


	21. It's Tainted

She was leaning over. Arms stretched out above her head bracing herself against the hard rock wall. Her knees trembled beneath her.

As the contraction subsided, she let out the gasp she'd been holding in. They'd been trapped in here for almost two hours now. A chill shook her. Whether it was the temperature of the cave dropping or her body adjusting to what was happening, she couldn't tell. Right now she was a mess. Being strong for one person was hard enough as it is. But trying to hold it together – trying to be brave and strong – Elizabeth didn't want to do it anymore. It was too hard. She'd always been the strong one. Every time he walked through that gate, she had to be strong. Every time his team missed their scheduled check-in, she had to put on the brave face. It was always her.

And now, here in this cave, she was going to have to put on her mask as always. Her body tensed again.

"You should have told me."

"Please don't …" She eased herself to the ground. Wincing as she tried to find a comfortable position. The shadows camouflaged her grimace from John.

"No, Elizabeth … we have to help each other. I need you to communicate with me. You need me whether you want to admit it or not. You've done your part in helping me, and I can't do mine if you don't let me in. How long?"

"I didn't want to worry you … you're …"

"I'm fine." He motioned for her to sit beside him. "Everything is going to be fine."

"John, I don't know if I believe you this time. I mean we don't even know where they took her. You could very well be bleeding to death. You're legs broken. Your injury list goes on and on. We're in a dark, cold, damp cave. And I'm …" The pent up tears carved a path down her rosy cheeks. Her shoulders shook as he tried to calm her nerves. As much as he didn't want to admit it, she was right. Their current situation seemed like it was their worst. But he wasn't going to let her think that. There always had to be a bright side to things, even when darkness seemed to consume you. Wiping away the tears that stained her cheeks, he combed his fingers through her curly hair, feeling her relax into him. "Do you remember what happened after Phoebus and Thalan took control?"

She laughed. "John that's not exactly something one forgets."

"This is like that."

She looked up into his eyes the way she always does when she thinks he might be losing it. "We tried to kill each other because of alien possession. We had no control over any of our actions. John, I did things that I would have never done otherwise. I shot Ronon, and Teyla almost killed you because of me. This is not the same. It's very different. We couldn't do anything to help our daughter. We can't do anything but sit here and wait for the others to dig us out, who knows how long that will take. We can't do anything. We have no control over …"

Then it hit her.

"We don't have control over anything, Elizabeth. We didn't then and we don't now. But what we do have is each other. So please … talk to me." She leaned her head heavily upon his shoulder. "Now will you let me in?"

She sighed shifting her weight, trying to ease the building pressure. Seeing her discomfort he tried to help her. "No, stop. If you keep moving like that, it might cause more damage. It might not just be a few ribs that are broken. I don't want to risk you further injuring yourself."

"So, you'd rather I sit here and do nothing, while you handle this by yourself?" He almost laughed. " Elizabeth, you know me better than that by now. I don't care how uncomfortable I am. Let me help you." She nodded in agreement.

"I just need to get up and walk around a little. I can't get comfortable on the ground." He was about to help her get up and start walking again, but another contraction hit. She tried to stifle the pain, but there was no use. Giving birth in the middle of a cold, dark cave was not something she'd been dreaming of experiencing.

* * *

"They should be ready to go by now?" He paced back and forth unable to stand still for the life of him. The last few minutes had changed him. 

"They'll be ready when they're ready." Annoyance pushing her over the edge. He hadn't stopped pacing since it happened. He wouldn't even take the time to help clean up the gate room. The blood soaked the cold ground marring it. When she had handed Rodney the white cloth, he refused tossing it into the pool of red.

"Well that's not fast enough! We should've left already!" Or maybe he hadn't changed that much. He was still the same old Rodney despite the day's earlier occurrence. She knew he was just angry, but they all were. He didn't have to take his grief out on his team. "I mean, for crying out load, lives are at stake here!"

"Rodney!" Sharpness followed her words – like an arrow following its target. "We know that lives are at stake. We already witnessed one person die today, and we're doing everything we can to make sure that doesn't happen again!" He nodded his head in affirmation.

His demeanor changed. His shoulders sunk back down. A wounded spirit now stood before her.

"I should have paid more attention, you know? Let her know that she was important. She made it worth while. Yes, she could be annoying," he smiles. "But she was also very …"

"I believe you are trying to say she was a good person, Rodney. And if that is the fact, then yes, she was. And, no, you couldn't have done more. She knew how we all felt. More than that, we gave her the opportunity to experience life on Atlantis. The life she missed out on before. She knew she was loved. And doubting yourself will not do any good."

The physicist smiled. "You know, Teyla, she was right." He ceased pacing, focusing his attention on his teammate. "It's no ones' fault. But that doesn't mean I don't feel guilty."

"I know." The familiar beat of Ronon's footsteps brought her out of her recollection and back to reality.

"We're ready."

"It's about time."

"Not now McKay."

By the look on Teyla's face Ronon knew that McKay had been like this ever since he and Carson had left to make sure that someone would handle the rest of the clean up.

"They could be dead by now for all we know. It's been what? Two hours since she came through the gate. If we had …"

"McKay, we moved as fast as we could considering the circumstances. We had to make sure that everything would be taken care of. We didn't want …"

"And now what are we doing? Still standing here. Waiting. Now they could be gone for all we know. And you wouldn't care!" Rodney looked at Ronon dead on. Seriousness in his tone.

"That's enough!" He was sick of McKay's ramblings. He knew he didn't mean what he had to say, but taking it out on Carson and him wasn't going to make what had happened go away. "Rodney! We cleaned it up okay. She's gone! She's not coming back. I know this is hard for you. But don't you think it's hard for us too. I cleaned it up. Teyla did what she had to do. Carson, we all cleaned it up." Rodney looked at the cold floor beneath them. It was tainted to him. There was a film there that would never dissolve no matter how much muscle you put into it. Gwen had died on the floor beneath him and for all he cared nothing else mattered at the moment. "We scrubbed on our hands and knees while you walked off. I can still smell it. Its must fills my mouth to the point where I want to retch! Do you really think Elizabeth would want to see that? Do you think John would want to see that? I didn't want to let them go through that McKay! Better that I deal with it now than later. It'll be hard enough on them knowing that she's gone. Knowing that they lost their daughter!"

"There was just so much blood." Ronon eased off of the physicist. "I just … she was right there. Right there. If she had just let us help her. She was so stubborn."

"Like father like daughter." Ronon turned to look at Teyla. "We should go now. Gwen said that they were injured. As you said Rodney, time is everything."

Rodney turned once more to look at the tainted floor. It had been a long day. The new year would be starting on earth soon. Just a few more hours. It didn't seem right to start off with death. "I'm ready."

And with that the shattered team left to bring back the two people who needed all of them now more than ever.

* * *

"We can do this. It'll be okay." He brushed the loose curls behind her ear, perspiration causing them to stick to her forehead. Another hour past. They were getting closer and closer together, and still he could do nothing to help her. He tried to move, tried to get up and go to her, but the sensation that something was ripping froze him in pain. This was what he didn't want to happen, what he had been afraid of since he first acknowledged his feeling for Elizabeth. He was afraid of seeing her in pain. Afraid of not being able to step-in and take away the pain, afraid of being helpless. He pushed back the stabbing and grabbed hold of her hand. "This will all be over before you know it. They'll come." He felt her shiver. 

She was afraid.

And he knew it.

"John, what if they don't get here in time? What if something happened to Gwen? What if we can't find her? Or they …" She tensed up again. "What if something goes wrong?"

"Hey, don't think like that. We'll get out of this just like we have every other time. Just like …" He had started coughing a little while ago. But this time it burned, and when he took his hand away from his mouth what he saw … the color red had become his least favorite over the years. On Elizabeth the color was one thing. He loved the red shirt she wore, but out on the field. Screams followed by red, or loud explosions and gun fire followed by red had become things that he hated more than anything else. More than Kolya, although most of the time he was responsible for any of those sounds. He hated the smell of it, the way it tasted in your mouth as you were close to the end. Much as it tasted now. The smear on his palm only confirmed what he thought the tearing meant. What the sharp stabbing sensation hinted at. He was bleeding internally, and anyone who knew what that meant knew that it could rapidly become life threatening. He could go into hemorrhagic shock, or worse. Elizabeth needed him right now.

She looked up into his eyes, the darkness making it hard to distinguish his expressions, but she could tell that something was wrong. "John? What is it?"

He quickly wiped the blood off on his uninjured pant leg. Grabbing her hand in reassurance, he continued to do his job – not only as her military commander, but as her husband. "Nothing's wrong. They'll be here soon. It'll be okay." He would keep her safe.

Even if it was from the truth.

**I am so, so, so sorry for the almost five month hiatus. I just dug myself a hole and couldn't seem to find my way out of it. But now the wait is over. Another chapter will follow this one soon. I know where the rest of the story is headed now. Again, my deepest apologizes. I can't believe it took me basically five months to update and to write this. I'm truly horrified. I hate it when I am reading a story that I really enjoy, and I come to dead end or the plot isn't resolved because it hasn't been finished yet. And here, I did the very thing that I hate. Sorry. If you can't already tell, I'm going to beat myself up about this for a while. Thank you for being so patient. And Thanks for the past reviews. Here's to wrapping this up, and giving you all an ending worth the wait. **

**Please review or message me. If you have anything that you want to see written into the story just let me know. I'll see what I can do. I at least owe you all that. **


	22. Even If They Were Both Breaking

"Where is it?" They had been flying for what seemed like forever. But realistically, it had only been about ten minutes.

"Calm down Rodney. You've already been here before, thus you know exactly how long it will take for us to get there. I've only heard about this place through mission reports and here say. We'll get there when we get there."

"Well, since we're on the subject, you think you could get use there any faster!"

"I'm not a pilot like Colonel Sheppard!" He was starting to get annoyed by the impatient astrophysicists. Rodney could be bloody rude at times. Carson knew he didn't mean it, but right now Rodney was just adding unwanted stress. "Plus, the last time I flew one of these things was when we were rescuing Ronon from …" The grunt from the runner made Carson reconsider his words. "I mean assisting him. I don't fly one of these every day Rodney, so excuse me for being a little rusty."

"Well, if you just …"

"Rodney, please, I don't think I can handle any more of this. We are almost there."

He sunk back into his chair trying to relax. Teyla was always the one who could get everyone to calm down.

"Fine." He was just on edge. So much had happened in just a few hours. I mean, just this morning everything was fine. John and Gwen were taking Elizabeth on a surprise picnic. That was it. There wasn't supposed to be an accident. There wasn't supposed to be a threat. There weren't even that many people who knew about this secret lagoon. Just Mica and a few others. The leader had even said that it was a great honor to be shown the secret door. So who informed the Wraith worshippers that John and his family would be there? Who betrayed them?

"Teyla …"

"Hmmm?" He started rubbing his temples. He could feel a headache coming on. His mannerisms were starting to concern her. "Dr. McKay, what is it?"

"Who else did Mica say knew about the cave and the lagoon?"

"No one. He just said that he brought his loved ones there. I assume he was referring to his wife."

"So if we're the only ones beside him who know about its existence, who tipped off Gwen's …" The missing word made him want to gag. He still hadn't really come to terms with what happened. Or in the manner that it had happened. He wasn't sure if he would forgive her for not letting them heal her. The scan that she had showed them after they first woke her from stasis would have been able heal the bullet wound. But she was so damn stubborn. Just like her father and her mother.

"Murderers?" she knew that Rodney couldn't say it. It was hard enough for her. She couldn't image how he was coping through this. Other than her parents, Rodney and Carson were the closest to Gwen. Rodney had met Gwen second to the Colonel. She remembered how this had all started. They had thought John was hallucinating. Elizabeth and Dr. Beckett were about to intervene and force the Colonel to speak with Kate. But for some reason Rodney stepped in. Teyla never found out what made him do it. What made him go down there, but whatever it was, she knew that John appreciated it.

She still could not believe that the events of that day so long ago led them to here. To this point in time.

If someone had told her almost four years ago that she would be part of a team from a planet called Earth, she would not have believed. Or that this team faced Wraith on a daily basis, she would not have believed. If someone had told her that the Colonel was not hallucinating. That he was in fact seeing images of his daughter who traveled from the past to save him and Elizabeth, she would not have believed. But now that she was sitting here just beside Ronon getting ready to rescue John and Elizabeth, she could not imagine life not taking them down this path.

Gwen fought for a worthy cause. Teyla respected that. Gwen is why they are even here to begin with. She did what she could. Now, they are trying to fight for what she came to save.

"Ronon, we need to find Mica first. Colonel Sheppard and Elizabeth are trapped between our only entrance from that side of the door. We need to find another way in. If the explosion was big enough – as Gwen said it was – then we might not be able to get through to them this side. And if I'm correct in assuming he had something to do with this, then we need to find him for entirely different reasons as well."

"We don't need to find him. Carson, keep us cloaked." Teyla followed Ronon's line of vision. "Open the back hatch, when I give the order." The man they suspected to be the cause of their circumstances was kneeling on the ground next to what was left of the cave opening.

"Ronon …" he glanced in her direction, ready to beat the pulp out of this guy. "Don't kill him. We still need him." He rolled his eyes.

"I'll set it to stun. Carson ease up slowly and get as low to the ground as you can without hitting him. I want to jump down on top of him so that I have the better advantage. We need to know if there's another entrance before I stun him, other wise we will have to wait. I think we all agree that is time we do not have."

They all nodded in accord.

* * *

What had he done? He was kneeling on the ground, a place once cherished as special now deemed non existent. He had done something horrible, that much he knew. These people had never done any harm by him. They were kind and trustworthy. A good ally against the Wraith if need be. Their leader had promised safety, promised that they would come to aid him and his people if need be. What he did was wrong, and he knew it. He only wished that he could take it back.

But if they knew what the consequences were for not obeying. If these foreigners knew what it was like to live under them, they would understand. Hopefully.

He was about to get up and leave when he saw it. Out of the corner of his eye, a vast figure was about to descend upon him. He leapt to move out of the way, but it was no use. The next thing he remembered was the man that Sheppard had called Ronon pointing a weapon at his head.

Then he saw their ship – the puddle jumper. The others from their previous visit stepped out from within, only now there was another.

The woman spoke first. She asked what my involvement was in what had happened. All I could think of was my betrayal. They had been friendly and I …

"Please, Mica. Time is everything." He still was not speaking. Teyla knew that Ronon was making him nervous, although she did not feel pity for him. He deceived their loyalty.

"If you don't tell me how we can get to them, I'm going to start with one of your fingers." His voice was calm, and everything that he said seemed to come out as if it was preplanned. He knew what he was going to do to Mica the moment that he had entered the jumper. Mica had been the only other person to know about Sheppard's planned outing. He was the only person who could have broken their reliance. "I'll count to ten. One … two … three … four … he touched the cool blaster to the man's index finger … five … six …"

"No, wait, please. I had no choice. They said they were going to cull our whole village if we didn't tell them. I had no choice. They wanted to know when you'd be back. We had a week to give them what they wanted. If we didn't comply, the Wraith were going to make sure there would be no alliance between our two people."

"How did they even find out that we had been here before?" Rodney ran through all the possible ways this information could have been relayed to the Wraith. "That doesn't make any sense, unless you spoke with them first to let them know that our team had made contact with you and your people. Otherwise, your story is faulty and you're lying. Ronon, keep counting!" Normally, he didn't like taking orders from anyone, especially McKay, but he'd felt like making an exception.

"Seven … eight …" Mica stated to panic. He needed these people to believe him. He did not mean harm. He just wanted to keep his village safe.

"Please, listen to me. It was not my fault. About a month ago, a man not from here came to us seeking refuge. He said he was running from the Wraith. They had culled his village and he was all that was left. There were burn marks from the fire that burned the rest of his village down. We took him in. Then, he became wary of you and the rest of your team upon your visit. He said that you would only bring trouble. Two days ago, he was found communicating with men just outside of the village. We had never seen them before. When questioned about this he fled, but before he got away one of the villagers stopped him. He was placed in holding and further questioned about his involvement with these men. We came to find out that they were Wraith worshippers. We wanted nothing to do with them. We tossed him out of town and wished to not take any part in what they were doing. But …"

Ronon pressed cool blaster to Mica's temple. "You might want to hurry it up."

"They came." It came out in a rush. Making it hard to distinguish. _Theycame._

"The Wraith?" Teyla looked at him concern was now shining through. She understood why he did it now. Without Mica even explaining the rest, she knew.

"They threatened us. Said that if we did not give them the location of this secret meeting place, they would cull. Only, this time, they would leave no survivors. They said that if we obeyed then we would be protected! I did not know what to do. The others asked me for this location. Told me to give them the answer, but I could not. I knew our alliance would be terminated if I gave in."

"What made you change your mind?" Carson had been silent through this whole thing, but now, he was intrigued. "You seem like a strong willed person. Why did you give in?"

"My family. The village did not care that we had just struck up a friendship with your people. All they could see was that the Wraith would kill us. I am sorry that I gave them the information that they were looking for. I just … I could not do that to my wife. Or my children. Our people were going to hurt them. I could not. It was that or give them a location for two people. Just two people. You have to understand that two is far less than a whole village. Even you can understand that."

"Unfortunately Mica, it was not just two people." He looked at Teyla with confusion.

"What do you mean? It was only Colonel Sheppard and one other. I did not see them, but he only spoke of one."

Ronon shook his head in defeat. He wished that this hadn't turned out so pleasantly. He wanted to punish someone for what had happened to Gwen. And now that Mica seemed to be just in the wrong place at the wrong time, all he wanted to do was scream.

"He took his daughter and his wife. Beside that … these two people are more than just that. Elizabeth, his wife, she is the expedition leader, not to mention she's pregnant. Colonel Sheppard is the military commander of Atlantis. And Gwen, she, oh geez … after the explosion, she managed to escape from the Wraith worshippers … but she didn't make it …"

"Mica, we need to get into that cave. Is there a way around?" He shook his head back and forth, a child. A child had died because he was not strong enough. "Mica, please. We don't have much time. Is there another way in?"

"Yes. There is one other way. Please, follow me. But be careful I do not know when they will be back."

* * *

He was coughing again. Only now, he was having a hard time controlling it.

"John are you sure …" He held up his hand and shook his head. After his coughing fit broke, he took a deep breath.

"I'm fine. I think it's just the air in here. It's stifling that's all."

"John …" she tried propping herself up, and then felt his forehead. "Oh my god, you're burning up. Why didn't you tell me?" She was uncomfortable, but what was new. The one thing that she did know, however, was that it was not stifling in here. If anything it was cold. "John, you're not fine. I thought we were going to communicate? You said …" Then another hit. They were at least ten minutes apart now.

When he heard her whimper he stopped. " Elizabeth, hold my hand." She took it without complaint. "I'm here. We're going to get through this."

"John … you keep saying … that … but I'm not …" He stroked her cheek trying to reassure her.

"Hey …" she looked into his eyes. "Do you trust me?"

"Yes." She said in between pants. "I trust you. But John, I'm scared."

"I know." He could handle this. But he was running out of time. He could feel it. Each breath was becoming harder and harder to take. But he wasn't going to give up. Not yet. He couldn't. She still needed him. "I love you."

"I love you more."

"You wish Elizabeth … Sheppard."

"We haven't said that since we got married."

"I know, but it doesn't mean I love you any less."

She laughed. "You better not."

"I don't. In fact, I think I love you more." She smiled up at him. He cupped her cheek.

If he hadn't been trying to be strong for the both of them, he might have admitted that it seemed hopeless. He might have admitted that their only escape route was cut off by an explosion. That he wasn't sure he would make it out even if the team arrived soon. That he was afraid of leaving her behind. Of leaving their daughter. And more than anything … that he was afraid that Gwen hadn't made it. He was afraid that seeing her being taken away would be the last memory he would have of the girl who caused so much trouble for them in the beginning.

"No matter what happens … no matter what we find when we get out of here …" She placed her fingers over his lips to silence him. Her beautiful eyes seemed to see right through him.

"John … for the first time today, I think that I truly believe that everything is going to be okay." She knew that something was wrong with him. She could see his strong demeanor breaking down. And what she could see of his face, she could tell he was just as scared as she was. Of what they would find once they did get out, of what his coughing gave way to. She was just as afraid. But now was not the time to voice fears. It was a time to be strong. Even though deep down they were both breaking.


	23. A Second Hope

This was taking longer than he would have liked.

Two hours were wasted in the gate room.

Those same two hours spent cleaning. Scrubbing. They wouldn't let anyone else do it. A technician tried to lend a hand. Ronon sent him away. In fact, anyone who wasn't Teyla, Rodney, Ronon, or himself was sent away. McKay clenched a rag in his fist. He was ready to bend down on hands and knees, but he couldn't. Carson saw that. A glint of guilt and anger flashed through his friend's eyes as he threw down the rag and slowly made his way to the stairs. That's when the technician came. But they didn't want him. It just didn't seem right for anyone else to take care of it. They were Elizabeth and John's closest friends. They considered each other family. On Earth, family would do what they could to help. Here they would do the same.

After the blood had been washed away, he and Ronon briefed Caldwell on the situation. If the Daedalus and its crew hadn't arrived on schedule, one of them would have had to stay behind to see that things would be taken care of. He supposed they at least owed Caldwell that bit of gratitude.

Ten more minutes were wasted flying.

Then ten more or so wasted interrogating Mica.

And now, fifteen more grueling minutes had been wasted in search of a second entrance. One that he was drastically starting to doubt existed. There was no more time to spare. The moment Gwen collapsed on the gate room floor, seconds, minutes, and hours seemed to slip past them. It wasn't fair.

When working, time appeared to drag on. When relaxing or enjoying ones' self, time flew by. And so goes the saying, "Time flies when you're having fun." But the one moment you actually need time to cease, it seems to have sped up. Leaving you behind to pick up the pieces broken in its wake.

They had no more time to spare.

And time continued to pass them by even as they searched for this new glimmer of hope.

"Mica, I'm sorry to ask, but …"

"Are we there yet?" Rodney was indeed annoyed as well. They had been speed walking for quite some time. "It's not like anyone's' life is hanging in the balance or anything!" Teyla and Ronon glared at him.

"It is just there." Mica pointed toward the hill in front of them. He had only recently found this route on one of his walks through the forests surrounding their village. The first door had been shown to him by his father. It was the closest to the gate – the most accessible. The second door, the more recently uncovered, led into the valley near the waterfall. It cut through the mountain pass. Once inside they would be able to find the door back toward the main entrance, back toward the explosion. Back toward Colonel Sheppard and his companion. "It is here." Mica pushed aside the creeping vines masking the wooden door from view. "I cannot follow you. My wife and children are still at home. I must be there in case the worshippers come back."

"We understand. Thank you, Mica. Through this you have shown great strength of character. Perhaps our alliance will survive depending on what we find ahead." Teyla and he touched foreheads. The Athosian greeting and farewell.

"Perhaps." He stared at the four brave souls. "But until then I bid you good luck. And may the ancestors smile upon you."

Rodney was the first to thrust open the old door. It creaked as the light began to shine in through the new breach. They were one step closer to John and Elizabeth.

* * *

"Promise me something?" She looked into his eyes feeling his hold on her hand weaken. He nodded. His remaining strength slipping away into nothing. "Don't ever give up." 

He laughed, well, coughed, but it didn't matter. The corners of his lips inched their way up. A smile. "Never."

"Promise?" She squeezed his hand tighter knowing that they were now rapidly losing this battle.

He nodded again. "I promise. I won't give up …" his raspy voice led to another fit of wheezing.

She cried. He cried. And leaning their heads together, they cherished the minutes that passed by as all hope seemed to flicker out.

"John …" He shushed her. Or at least tried to.

"It's okay. Remember. All I want you to do is concentrate on yourself and Gwen. Concentrate on getting out. That's it." He wiped the tears from her eyes.

"I can't." Her voice was silent, barely audible, but he knew in his heart what she meant.

"Yes, you can." He kissed the pain away. "You are the strongest person I know. Not many women could go through labor in the middle of a cold, damp, dark cave." He grinned, knowing his sarcasm wouldn't help now. "You can do this."

She shook her head. "Not without you. It's not worth it if you're not here with me." Then it started again. The contractions. She breathed like he taught her. And she held his hand like he told her to. It made it easier knowing he was right beside her.

"I'll never leave you Elizabeth." Her sobs wracked her body.

She shook her head holding back the urge to throw up. This was taking a lot out of her. "You never were a good liar." She whimpered and then leaned into him.

"Close your eyes." His voice smooth and quiet. "Think of Atlantis." All he could do was try and keep her calm. She needed to stay strong, and there was only one place that ever comforted her. One place they enjoyed each others' company without having to speak. He would take her there. "Find our balcony." He sensed her muscles relax. "What's the weather like?"

She breathed deeply.

"Sunny. There's a breeze." He sighed, stroking the brunette curls away from her face.

"Can you smell the ocean? The way the wind carries it to your senses." He paused and closed his own eyes. "Now look down at your own hands. What do you want more than anything?"

He waited for a response, but she was silent. "More than anything Liz?"

"You're standing next to me. The sun is setting, and I'm looking up into your eyes. Everything but your face becomes a blur, and –"

"– and what? What do you want to happen?"

"And, when I look down, you're holding Gwen. She's a beautiful, healthy, alive little girl with ten fingers and ten toes." The tears start to flow again. "She was never taken from us. The cave-in never happened. We're safe on Atlantis. You're safe. She's safe, and that's all that matters."

Both of them relax deeper into each other. Exhausted. Beaten. "I love you Elizabeth."

"John …" She was going to admit it. She was going to tell him how scared she was. But, there was a voice in her head that told her now was not the time. That this may be their last moments together, and if that was true, she didn't want those to be her last words to him. Not when what she could tell him was that he had changed her. That he had turned her world upside down – for the better. Not when she could tell him that from the moment they met, she had fallen for him. Fallen for his smile. Fallen for their midnight coffee trips. Fallen for their conversations on their balcony – even the silent ones. Not when she could say that without him … the world didn't make sense … she didn't make sense. He was everything, and he needed to know that. "I love you too John. More than you could possibly know."

"Till the end?"

It was their game. Something they seemed to have a lot of. _Till the end _wasn't a question. It was statement of sorts. A _no matter what. _A _when we get out of this._

It meant that they'd be there for each other. That they'd love each other when they got out of it – what ever it was – no matter what, because till the end, till they each took their last breathe, their love was stronger than defeat.

"Till the end." Then their eyes fluttered shut. Exhaustion taking over. Defeat sinking in. Theirs' was a love so strong, nothing could separate them. Not the Wraith. Not the Wraiths' worshippers. Not the Genii. Nothing. Not even death itself.

* * *

"If it weren't for the circumstances, I think I might actually enjoy this." Carson let his eyes wander. The waterfall, the meadow, the bloom of flora. He could see why the Colonel wanted to bring his wife and daughter here. It was practically perfect. 

"Yes, well, under different circumstances maybe we'd all enjoy it." Rodney placed his palm around the door handle. "But …" He paused, the door still unopened.

"What's the hold up McKay?" Ronon spoke up from behind Teyla. "Open it."

"Just wait … we don't know what kind of damage will be behind this door. We're going to have to be very careful. The cave could be unstable. One of us might breathe wrong, and the whole thing could come crashing down for all we know!"

"Rodney, we know what the possibilities are, but that is not going to stop us from completing this mission."

He looked into the Athosians eyes, then into Carson's, and last Ronon's. "I'm just saying …" he stopped to collect his thoughts. Something that he never had to do. "We don't know what we're going to find. Or what …" His gaze left theirs' and drifted to the ground beneath them.

They all knew what he was thinking. There might not be anyone to bring home, anyone to rescue. It could be too late. All that time wasted, and for what, nothing? They knew the possibilities. They knew the likeliness of what they might find.

"It is alright Rodney." She placed her hand on top of his. He nodded and with that said and his fears voiced, he turned the handle with Teyla's help. No matter what they would find, they would find it together.

* * *

It started out as a slight annoyance. Like someone was slowly illuminating the room. But it quickly seeped through her resting eyelids becoming brighter and brighter by the second. She didn't want to open her eyes. Didn't want wake up from such a good dream. 

_They were sitting on the beach hand in hand. The waves licking at their feet, taunting them to follow. Her head was resting on his shoulder. And for once, nothing seemed like it could go wrong. It was only the two of them, and nobody else. Peace swept over them. _

_Then came a voice beckoning for them to get up, telling them to fight. To hold on for just a bit longer. _

"_Mom, please …"_

That's when she first stirred. "Gwen?" It was fuzzy at first. Her eyes had yet to adjust to the new light. She blinked waiting for her pupils to accommodate. Then she smiled.

**I hoped that you liked this chapter. I am almost done. I was going to have this chapter be the last, but I just wanted to get something uploaded for all of you, so there will probably be only one or two chapters left. Then this story will be complete. Once again, thank you for reading this and reviewing. I greatly appreciate the advice and the comments. You have spurred me on. **

**What do you think will happen next? Oh, and last chance to request anything to appear in the story. If you have suggestions or things you want to happen before it is over, let me know. I'll see what I can do. Enjoy what is to come. Thanks again.**

**Please review.**


	24. Blinding

"There isn't much time." The young girl stated it knowing questions would soon follow her mother's smile. "After I do this, goodbyes will be cut short, do you understand?" Her mother's furrowed brow answered no. Gwen's expression softened.

"Mom, you need to fight this. I came back for a second chance at a life with my parents. I did all this for you." The corners of her mouth inched their way into a smile. "We don't get a second chance if I'm never born." She said it sarcastically, but the glistening of her eyes gave way to the truth. Inside, she was breaking, but she was strong like her father.

Elizabeth shook her head. She glanced to her right and left, looking for an entrance. Looking for where her daughter could have come from, but there was nothing outside of the immediate area. Darkness surrounded them. "Gwen, how did you –"

"– All will be revealed soon. I promise, but you have to –" She could see the panic in her mother's features.

"– no, oh no, Gwen." It was mumbled, but as the truth hit her like a freight train going full speed, she began to fear the worst – her desperation became clear.

Elizabeth's eyes burned. Gwen hadn't made it. At some point, between the explosion and now, her daughter had died. And the part that hurt her most was that there was nothing she could do.

"Please don't cry. It'll be okay." The young adult crouched before her mother. "None of us knew what today would bring when we woke this morning. It was just supposed to be a picnic. Remember? Nothing more. How could we have anticipated such events?" Gwen reached out, clasping her mother's hands in between her own. "You gave me the opportunity to get to know you. I couldn't ask for more." Her mother's gaze drifted toward the unconscious man next to them. Her features turned somber.

"He will be alright, mom." That's when the reality of the situation hit. Janus had helped her break the rules once again. Now, this was her last chance. She needed to finally finish this – to stop the future from becoming something other than her _happily ever after _– so to speak.

"Mom, you need to listen to me okay. There's something I have to do, but …" she glanced at her father's still form. "But once I've finished that's it. We won't have that much time left anymore. In fact, I'm not sure how quickly they'll react." She shook her head, glancing up from time to time. Then her gaze rested on John's still form. "The point is: I'm not going to get to say goodbye to him. Not like I have with you. I won't get to reassure him. I won't be able to explain that this is alright. I need you to comfort him. Tell him that this wasn't his fault. He can't do anything about it now, worrying and blaming won't get either of you anywhere."

Elizabeth tightened her hold on her daughter's hands.

"When did you become so wise?" Touched, Gwen smiled and responded in the only way she knew how.

"My mother taught me that words can smooth over almost anything. My father told me to be brave, to fight for what I believed in. And I believe in you. I believe in dad. That's why I'm here. One last time." Gwen turned to finish what she had started.

"Wait." Elizabeth reached out to her. "There is one thing …" her daughter's smile brightened. "The ancients are known for their strict rules. They have a no interference policy. Why did they let you?"

"I knew you'd ask that eventually." She took a deep breath, mentally preparing herself for this hard topic. "Just because we're not allowed to interfere, doesn't mean we can't observe. The only thing is –"

"– you couldn't standby and do nothing." Gwen shook her head.

"Once I ascended, I immediately searched you out. I needed to know how this would end. You have to understand that after coming here, after seeing you and dad and living with you, I couldn't leave it alone. I needed to see if all I went through had been worth it."

"Gwen, you don't have to prove your point to me. Of all people, I understand what it's like waiting for someone or a group to come home safely. I know how you must have felt."

The eighteen-year-old conceded. "When I saw how the situation progressed all I could think of was coming back, but … you know how they are." Elizabeth nodded. "I found Janus, and he agreed that it wasn't right. He never has been one to follow the majority, and jumped at the chance to help me complete what I had started. He's holding them back for as long as he can, so I can finish here. But, after that, it'll be over. I won't be able to help any more." Her hands went up to her face, massaging away the day's events. "But, it won't really be over, I guess."

"What do you mean?"

"You know that I won't really be gone right? That I'll always be with you? Mind, body, and spirit?"

"Gwen, if this really is the end … mind and spirit _you _will always be with us, but body?" She shook her head.

"That's where you are wrong." Gwen placed her right hand on her mother's stomach. Elizabeth gasped, but not in pain, in delight because as Gwen's hand connected with her, the baby kicked. "I will always be with you in some way, shape, or form. And I've never really been gone either. Please explain that to him when he wakes up. When you really wake up. I love you mom."

"Wait, Gwen, I'm not ready to let go!" But, it was already too late. Her daughter released Elizabeth's hands to take her fathers. Light encircled them, and Elizabeth slowly lost sight of the daughter who had come to save them.

* * *

He shielded his eyes from the light. It was piercing like the annoying strobe lights back on Earth. He thought this was supposed to be a cave. Weren't they dark and deep? Instead, as soon as they cautiously entered, light seemed to pour out. 

That's when he saw them. Three people. Silhouettes. "Carson, I …"

They all stopped, unprepared for the vision before them. "Close your mouth Rodney. We can only assume what is going on."

"Right, but … she should be –"

The physician nodded. "I know, lad."

Ronon pushed passed them anxious to get closer.

* * *

Elizabeth groaned, opening her eyes. Everything was spinning, and then she felt it rising from deep inside her. Clenching her fists, she waded through it counting like he had taught her.

* * *

John stirred, glancing over at his wife. He took her hand and crouched before her, waiting for her to look at him. She whimpered, trying to stay strong. 

"She healed you, John." He wiped a tear from her cheek and shook his head back and forth confused. But when he saw the fear in her eyes, he pushed aside his questions and focused on only her.

"I'm here now, and I'm not going any where okay?"

He could hear the footsteps getting louder. And what he swore was the beam from a flashlight blinded him.

"Sheppard, it's good to see you're alright." Ronon appeared out of the light first. Teyla, Rodney and Carson followed closely behind.

"Oh thank god! We thought that you were …" Teyla elbowed the scientist in the ribs, knocking the air out of his lungs. She placed her hand on his shoulder as he regained his posture. "What was that for?"

All she had to do was glare at him and nervous silence became his choice of action.

" Elizabeth, how ya doing lass?" Carson monitored her pulse as he looked to John for answers.

She was growing weaker and weaker by the minute. All the hours of waiting, the stress of not knowing whether or not John would make it had finally taken their toll. She was exhausted.

* * *

"We need to get her out of here … Teyla, can you and Rodney, please … and John, I need you and Ronon to … can you pilot the jumper? I wasn't very …" It was coming out in chunks, and the flashlight must have been dying because she was having a hard time focusing on everyone around her. It was getting darker.

* * *

"Hey?" He squeezed her hand, coaxing her to open her eyes. " Elizabeth, stay with me. I know it's been a long day, but you can do this. Stay with –" Her eyes fluttered shut. "I love you, stay with me. Elizabeth? Eliza –"

* * *

There was a loud crash. "McKay! Hold it together. We need to watch her not you!"

* * *

"How's she doing Carson?!"

* * *

"How much more time?" He checked her pulse again, wanting desperately to get her hooked up to a fetal monitor.

* * *

"We're almost there! Hold on Liz!"

* * *

He found the tired colonel slouched in the same corner chair as every other bedside visit. A pillow tucked behind his mussed hair. He almost didn't want to wake him, but Beckett knew what John's answer would be to that. 

"Sheppard?" He placed his hand on the man's shoulder, siring slightly. "Colonel?"

He blinked passed the sleep abruptly and stood without a second thought. "How is she?"

"We were able to get fluids back into her system. To be honest, I'm surprised she held on for that long." The physician massaged his temples. "But you know her better than anyone, and she's never been a quitter. And Gwen is doing very well. There were no complications, or any –"

John shut everything else out. He heard all that he needed. His wife and daughter were fine. After everything that they had been through, it was all okay. He collapsed into his chair almost amused. It really was going to be okay after all.

"– but I'm still unsure how you survived all this without a single scratch on you. Elizabeth has everything from bruises to minor lacerations, and look at you. You're unscathed."

"Gwen." He smiled mostly to himself.

"She's fine, I just have to …" John shook his head.

"No, it was Gwen. I was dying Carson. I could feel it. When I first came to I relayed everything to Elizabeth. I _had _everything from mere scratches to deep lacerations. I couldn't breath, my leg was broken. I could feel my body shutting down. But Gwen, she just … I don't remember much. Elizabeth said that Gwen saved me. And I already know what that means because she wasn't in that cave with us. I mean, not the new … Gwen." He looked up, misty-eyed, and asked what had been nagging at him since he regained consciousness only to find his team surrounding them back at the cave. "What happened, Carson? I mean, she must have gotten back because the jumper we left in this morning was docked. She must have made it back here. That's the only thing I can come up with. And if she didn't bring that back, and by chance one of you piloted it here, then that means it was just a dream That means she's still out there with those …" He couldn't say it. He clenched his jaw, dug his fingers into his right temple and sighed. " Carson, what happened?"

"John," he inched forward, "I'm sorry. She wouldn't let us help. I tried, but she was more focused on you and Elizabeth. She didn't want to risk there not being enough time." He stopped, afraid to say any more.

" Carson, tell me what happened after that. Where is she?"

"It was a bullet wound to her side, near her abdomen. I'm sorry John, but she didn't –"

Sheppard shook his head, wiping away the tears that threatened to sneak out of his eyes. "Can I see Elizabeth?"

"She's still resting, but you can go in and sit with her if you like. Surgery took longer than expected." Carson folded his hands. "But everything went quite smoothly. And little Gwen, well –"

"Where is she?"

"Nurse Stevens is monitoring her right now. 6 pounds, 10 ounces." Carson sighed deeply. "Ten fingers, ten toes. She's perfect, but we already knew that."

"How long will she be asleep?"

"Gwen will be –"

"No," he shook his head. "When will Elizabeth wake up?"

"Giver her some time John. It's been a long day for her and …" he froze when he saw John wince. "I'm sorry, Colonel, I didn't mean –"

But John raised his hand, forcing Carson to stop. "It's okay. It's been …" he paused, thinking about what he was going to say. "… rough for all of us."

With that said, he slowly made his way toward the door to wait beside his wife. Dreading and anxiously anticipating the next few hours or days as they recovered from the explosion. At least they weren't alone. And death wasn't breathing down their necks.

**I am so sorry once again. It feels like I've been saying that a lot lately. Well, they're home. What do you think? I'm not quite finished. Almost, but not quite. I'm setting a deadline for myself. Just so you all know. This story will be finished before June 9. I hope that you enjoy the rest. And again, I'm sorry for the inconvenience and the pain of waiting for updates. **

**Thanks to – **

**Freckles-101, jollygoauld, Whirlwind-2005 and Padme4000 for your last reviews. In response: **

**Freckles-101 – **I am so sorry that it has taken so long for my updates. Thank you for sticking around and continuing to read my story. I wish that I had been more punctual. I am glad that you think John and Elizabeth are well written. They are my favorite characters on the show. Secretly, I am still gunning for them on the show. J

**jollygoauld – **Thank you for your review. And don't worry, the unborn Gwen will … well, I won't spoil the surprise for you. Please enjoy, and again, thank you for your support.

**Whirlwinf-2005 – **I am so glad that you liked the John and Elizabeth scene. I hope that you continue to love the rest of the story. It's almost over. Enjoy, and thank you for your review.

**Padme4000 – **I'll try to fit in the party. That sounds like a good idea. I have a few more things to wrap-up and tie together so it's not quite done yet. I hope you enjoy the rest. Thanks again.

**Jessica**


	25. The Locket

**The characters of this story are not my own. I only claim Gwen and the plot line. **

Her first inclination was to bolt up, but the heavy weight of exhaustion prevented her from following through. She was confused at first, everything was hazy. There were lights, dimmed but still there. Through the fog she could tell she was no longer in the tunnel. On top of that, the warmth and comfort of blankets and pillows assured her that she was most likely in the infirmary. She mumbled something inaudible, getting a response from beside her.

"Hey sunshine. How are you feeling?" He rubbed at his eye sockets. It had been four days since the rescue. He never left her side. Rodney brought him the occasional coffee, while Teyla and Ronon provided the food and company. Carson was busy monitoring Gwen's vitals. He wanted to make sure they hadn't missed anything – so much adventure and drama for someone so small. She was fine though. Perfect even. He held her at night, talking to Elizabeth at the same time, letting her know what was going on around them. Gwen just slept in his arms.

"Better. How long have I been –"

"Roughly fifty-six hours." Her brow furrowed in response. "What? It sounds shorter than 4 days, and I figured you'd want the shorter sounding answer." He grinned.

"Four days." She said faintly while a tear escaped her and trailed down her cheek.

"Hey," He slipped his hand under hers and leaned forward. "We made it. We made it Elizabeth. No more broken legs, no internal bleeding. No unhappy ending. And we lost one daughter only to gain her back, so I say that calls for celebration or at least a certain amount of thankfulness."

She nodded in agreement, letting slip a few more mournful tears. Carson walked in, cradling something in a yellow blanket. "John I thought that you might …" he looked up and immediately his started beaming. " Elizabeth, I see you've finally decided to join us dear. Welcome back." He said the last part while placing the sleeping Gwen in her arms.

"And I thought hallucinations were a sign of bad things." He placed his index finger under the palm of his daughter's tiny hand. "How could this possibly be a bad thing?" He chuckled to himself.

"This is what she wanted most. For us to all be together. It's just hard knowing that she … it just feels strange knowing that she died, but at the same time never left us." Elizabeth stroked her daughter's cheek. "We lost her, and yet we didn't. I don't know whether to mourn her or be happy that we have a chance to start over with her."

"A little bit of both I guess. She wouldn't want us to dwell on what happened. The best thing we can do now is move forward knowing that she's still here," he knew it wouldn't be easy, but then again, their lives never were. There was always another enemy they had to face. Imminent doom and destruction knocked on their doorstep incessantly. It came with living in another galaxy. Heck, it came with living in any galaxy – Pegasus or Milky Way. They chose this and nothing could make them give it up.

* * *

"No, no, no. It's not compatible. You have to … oh forget it. It'll just be easier if I do it myself," Rodney wedged his way in-between Radek and their latest project. 

"Rodney, Colonel Sheppard asked us to do this together, and I for one would like to be a part of this. Now, if you would have just followed the simple instruction then you would know that the left attachment fits into that depression there."

"No, it doesn't, and _I for one _don't want to give this to them in any shape or form other than perfect. It's just a simple set of assembly acquired. Nothing that I – genius – can't handle."

"Rodney," Radek stared at him as if he were insane. It was 2 o'clock, and they had started this assignment four hours ago. He had missed lunch and was starving. "It's a bassinet!

"And, your point being what exactly?" He continued to tinker.

"I didn't think I'd have to explain that statement any further. If we mess up, we can start over, take it apart. This isn't a science experiment that relies on us making no mistakes. It will not blow up Rodney. I happen to know how to put one of these things together. It is not astrophysics," he was practically ranting now. All he wanted to do was help, and McKay as treating him like a child bound to break something.

"I know it's a bassinet. But it's for them. They've been through a lot. I just want to do something to make it easier."

Radek beamed. "Are you saying you're trying to do something for someone else Rodney purely because you feel like it? No hidden agenda?" Rodney glared at him, thinking of retaliation. He found one. "You have decided to do something selfless? I must say I am shocked by this, normally you just –"

"I could be down in the labs, in fact I should be, but I don't trust you to do this by yourself. It'd probably be off-centered or worse – unstable. I don't want Gwen's first injury to be the result of a poorly assembled crib."

"And you'd think that I would put less effort in as you. You don't think I care about her well-being just as much. If you hadn't …" Their bickering trailed off, while unbeknownst to them a couple eavesdropped in the hallway.

* * *

"Should we tell them, we could do it ourselves? It might save Radek an earful. I'm sure he wouldn't mind if we just stepped in and interrupted," John smiled as his whispered his comments into Elizabeth's ear. It had been a week since they returned home, and it wasn't till now that they had started to worry about setting up any sort of nursery. Carson had kept Gwen in the infirmary just to make sure everything was alright. I mean, they assumed that it was. Future Gwen had assured them of that. But, Beckett couldn't help but worry. It was in his nature to fuss. 

"Let's just leave them alone for now. I'm sure it will resolve eventually. Besides, this just goes to show how much they really care. They're fighting over a crib John," she giggled. "Two grown scientists. Two grown men are fighting over our daughter."

"You know, you're right. I didn't think about it that way. Rodney has been a little protective lately," he smirked.

"It's not just Rodney," she shook her head in amusement. "Ronon and Teyla check in nonstop to see how Gwen is. And have you seen the way Ronon looks at people when they crowd around Gwen? If they're even a little too close for his liking, he let's them know." John grimaced at her last observation. He would hate to see what Ronon would be like if he ever had children of his own. "Teyla is just as bad."

They laughed as they walked back down to hall toward the infirmary. It was time to check in on their daughter, and they were comforted knowing that they had others – friends and family – who loved their Gwen just as much as they did.

* * *

A few weeks later

John, Rodney, Ronon, and Teyla returned from an off-world mission.

"We visited the planet, and found this," John placed the chest on her desk.

As she lifted the heavy lid, she noticed the emblem was Lantean design, bearing two familiar initials – GS.

They smiled together as John stood behind her, taking in what had been left behind. "It's all there, everything that we had left with her in the alternate reality."

The first piece she lifted out was a photograph of her, John and Gwen – she couldn't be more than two months. There were others of them in different parts of the city. Their balcony, the dining hall, the infirmary of all places, and their room. There were two letters – one from John and one from her. And her wedding ring. When her alternate self found time to take it off and stow it away in the midst of a war was unknown to her. But it must have been important enough. The last thing within the case was a locket. One she had seen many times.

_It hung from the neck of a stranger incased in a frozen chamber. She wore a sapphire, long-flowing gown. Her hair hung loosely in brunette curls and around her neck hung a bright, cerulean locket. Gwen wore that necklace every day until her last. _

"This is what she wanted us to find. Carson said she told them to revisit the planet where you were shot. But what I don't understand is if she placed this there in the other reality, why is here. Why did we find it?"

"I don't know Elizabeth. I don't even know what to think." He placed his hands on her tense shoulders.

Her thumb brushed the locket's smooth surface, touching the crystal within it. A bright light gleamed out, absorbing them in white.

_I never thought I'd have to make this, but Janus and Kara said it would be wise. In times like these, no one knows what may become of us – they said. The Wraith are here, and tomorrow could very well be our last. They sounded morbid, pessimistic, and I feel bad for having hope. For holding on to what little we have left. Janus said it is because I'm different. I don't come from Atlantis. Well, at least not this one. _

_I can see the hive ships from here. The balcony provides a clear view of what our city has become. You know, if it weren't for the possibility of impending death, the explosions above the shield would almost be pretty. _

_I can't distinguish where this locket came from. I don't know if someone who loved me made or … anything. _

_One day, Kara just slipped it into my hand and told me to trust her. She said it came through the gate eighteen years ago with my biological parents – John and Elizabeth Sheppard. Not something you want to hear after spending your whole life with said people who claimed to be family. _

_I wish that I could meet them. I wish … I knew them. How I long for a deep embrace or words of adoration. It doesn't seem fair that I lost them. _

_Kara sat me down and told me the truth. Moros wasn't happy, but at this point I am not focused on his anger. The war is overtaking us, and our people are dieing. Truth is all we have left. _

The light flickered and died. John and Elizabeth both jolted, confused.

"What was that?"

"I could see her John, standing where we normally do."

"Her voice was in my head. That was weird," he stood silent not really sure what to say. "What happened?"

"I think it was a live journal. That's what it felt like. Kara and Moros, she said they were her adoptive parents after we …"

"… After we died," he kneeled down looking into Elizabeth's eyes. "Do whatever you did again, maybe there's more."

_I'm afraid of what will happen to Atlantis while I sleep. They left today. Atlantis is vacant. I am the last of the Lanteans. Janus said that this wouldn't be easy. He said that traveling forward would be harder than I thought. This locket that has become so dear to my heart has provided me with a way to leave behind my essence. I never thought I would have to use it – that one day I might be gone and need a way to remind myself of what happened – to keep to my promise to never let anything happen to my true parents. This is my failsafe to restore memory that is lost. _

_So if in fact I did not make it, and you are the only ones to find this piece of heart, remember I am always with you. I will never leave, and I loved you more than sun loves to rise. Mom, dad, the chest was my gift to you. It is everything that I have dear to life. Letters, found within the sleeves of your jackets. Handwritten with love and tears, they are what Kara me to reveal your hearts, your true selves. Photographs of sunny days spent on dad's favorite beach. Mom's wedding ring, which contained more shared memories. These are my gifts to you in case I do not finish this mission. The locket is the key to restoring what was lost. I hope that it brings you as much solace as it provided for me. _

_Calium videre eessit, et eraos ad sidera tollere vultus. _

_Aveo _

_With all my heart, Gwen. _

Silence surrounded them now without their daughter in their heads. At some point Elizabeth reached out to John and now they were holding hands, taking it all in.

"What did that last part mean? What is 'Calium videre esss'… something, something?"

Elizabeth smiled, "It means, 'When you see her, you see the sky, and those on earth must lift their faces toward the stars. Goodbye.'"

"Wow," he paused and then couldn't help himself. "What does that mean?" Elizabeth giggled while wiping away the tears that assaulted her cheeks.

She shook her head, leaning forward. "I'm not sure John. It's ancient, very close to Latin, but I don't know why she said that in that particular context. Maybe with time." Can you believe she left this chest in that cave for us? On that mission, none of you could figure out how to get inside of the cave. She must have known this was there, and wouldn't let you through."

"Rodney did say it was supposed to be easy. Huh, she didn't want us to get in. She knew that if there was a chance that she would fail that …"

Elizabeth let go of John's hand and stood up at her new revelation. "She wanted us to have something else to hold onto in the off chance that she wouldn't make it. _Calium videre eessit, et eraos ad sidera tollere vultus._"

"Again, what?"

"When you see her, you see the sky, and those on earth must lift their faces toward the stars," she said, hoping he would catch on.

"All I get from that is that our daughter was good with riddles," He physically winced. "Sorry."

"It's okay John. She said, '_The locket is the key to restoring what was lost.'" _

"The locket contains her memories, so unless it brings people back to life I don't see how this will help bring back something that's been lost. I still remember our daughter. I haven't forgotten her."

Elizabeth pulled him to her. "Follow me." She picked up the locket and headed for the infirmary.

**Please let me know what you think of this chapter. I greatly appreciate the reviews that I have been receiving. **

**Freckles-101: I already sent you a message, but again, thank you so much for your review. **

**Jollygoauld: I'm glad you're glad that Sheppard made it. I didn't and would never have the heart to kill him permanently. I love his character too much. After all, where would be without our hansom flyboy. **

**Padme4000: Thank you again for your review. I am glad that you are still enjoying this plot line. **

**I hope that everyone continues to like this. Let me know again what you think of it so far. Oh, and what do you think will happen in the next chapter. I have already started to write it, and I am almost done. Soon to be posted. **

**HeartyJessica**


	26. Stella

**Just so you all know (to avoid confusion) the italicized words are dialogue out loud. So for instance, the first lines "_I don't want to stay here" are spoken out loud. Whereas, "_Silence" is thought inside the characters head. Wow, I hope that makes sense. If not, Sorry. **

**Disclaimer: I am not the owner of Stargate Atlantis or anything affiliated with it.**

The white light was annoying. It was supposed to emulate serenity. But she couldn't stand it. Not once she had gotten a feel for cloudy, mixed-up interference.

_I don't want to stay here. _

Silence.

_You can't make me._

Stillness.

_I'll just leave again._

More nothing.

_Watch me._

But this time she was met with a force greater than what had pulled her back.

_We won't let you interfere again Gwen. _It shouted, breaking her train of thought. _You were warned and this … _it glanced around almost sorry for her … _is what you chose. _

_And what is it exactly that I'm supposed to have chosen. _She scanned her surroundings hoping that her original perception of this place had been false. But she feared the worst, having heard horror stories relayed to her by Janus and a few other despondent scientists.

_Don't play the part of a fool Gwen, we both know you were always too clever for your own good. _The figure finally revealed itself to her, confirming her original suspicion.

_Was it that you never wanted me to succeed at anything, or were you just worried I would embarrass you Moros. _He stared into her eyes, sending chills up her spin.

_I don't want to fight with you Stella. _She froze, having not heard her nickname in a while. _I see you still remember. _

_How could I forget? It's the reason I started suspecting that I was different. Or have you **forgotten **that the others my age snickered when hearing it. _

_It only ever meant Star. It suited our way of life better than the name they bestowed upon you. _

She shook her head disapprovingly. _I was from a different time Moros. You really thought that giving me another name would change all that?_

_Stella, if you had just – _

_My name is Gwen Sheppard, and I won't have you call me anything else. _She said it defiantly, regretting that choice as he circled her.

_This was supposed to have been easy. You were to get one last chance, but it seems you will not be given that either. You broke the rules. _

Rules are meant to be broken.

_You disobeyed orders._

I had to follow the orders of my heart.

_We gave you a chance._

I couldn't live without knowing.

_Janus was foolish to assist you in your endeavors. _

No, you were foolish to think I wouldn't succeed. It's changed for the better.

_Stella. _

Silence.

_Stella._

Stillness.

_Gwen, please look at me. _She tilted her gaze toward him. _I'm sorry it has to be this way._

* * *

" Carson where is she?" Elizabeth and John were standing behind his desk.

"Dr. Biro is going over her charts right now. We just wanted to make sure that we didn't miss anything. Elizabeth where are you …" his voice trailed off as Elizabeth and John both turned around in search of Biro. "Oh, just wait, I'll take the both of ya," he said while running after them.

* * *

She hoped that this would work. It wasn't like they needed a favor from anyone. That is if there was anyone listening to their silent prayers. But really, they wanted this more than anything. They had just gotten to know her and it didn't seem right. I mean, she knew that their daughter wasn't really gone. I mean, here she is lying bundled up in front of them on the infirmary counter. They hadn't truly lost Gwen. But apart of them felt broken, bitter at the fact that they had lost one Gwen in order to save another.

She wasn't sure if two could exist in one reality. She had heard Rodney spout off enough times to know that it was dangerous. It threw things off balance. But there was something about Gwen's final salute that hinted the impossible.

So instead of just thinking, Elizabeth laid the crystal locket over her sleeping daughter and hoped.

* * *

Moros turned to leave, losing optimism that he would ever get through to his stubborn Star.

_Wait, before you go, there was always something I wanted to ask you. _So he waited for her question, assuming he at least owed her that before she was left to a fate such as Oma Desala. _When you see her, you see the sky, and those on earth must lift their faces toward the stars. _

He knew well what she was talking about.

_Please, tell me it wasn't just false hope. Tell me I didn't just do all of this for nothing. That what you taught me had some higher purpose. _

He sighed heavily, his posture giving him away. _Gwen, nothing I ever taught you was worthless. I may not have agreed with some of Janus' ways, but despite that Kara and I never wanted you to feel like you weren't important to us. Unfortunately, you persisted in trying to uncover something that was never meant to be found. _She could tell he was tensing up. _We didn't want you to get hurt. You had something that not many Lanteans had left – hope. Your search for the truth was slowly shattering that, so I tried to stop you. But … even when you thought that you were alone, there was never a moment where I was not proud of you. And your mother, Kara … she left you that locket as a bequest in case you ever chose to follow through with your little plan. In the face of my disapproval, she imparted a gift unlike that of any other. _

He paused searching for what to say next. _One of two keys to a person's heart. You know what it does. Otherwise, I'm sure you never would have left it. _

Tear-stained cheeks hit his chest before he had a chance to react. _I am thankful. You were the only father I knew for 18 years. And I'm not going to say that I want to stay here because we both know that's a lie, but for what it's worth, I am thankful. _

* * *

"Now will someone please explain to me what is going on," John held his hand up, gesturing silence.

"Just … give us a minute Carson," he placed his hand on Elizabeth's shoulder. "Liz, what …"

But before he could finish a gleam of light caught his eye, and pulled his vision back to his daughter.

* * *

_What do you mean I'm not staying? _She backed away confused. _I thought that … interfering isn't aloud and after that either your memory is wiped clean or you –_

_Did you want me to tell you the answer? _

She nodded. _Then for once, be still. _

_I'm sorry._

_No, I am sorry. _

_For what? _

He just smiled, embracing her in his arms. _I really am proud of you. _And with that he pushed her – strong and hard.

And she fell for what seemed like an eternity until darkness consumed her being and the last thing she remembered was Moros' smile.

**Okay, before I upload the rest, I have a question. There are two ways that this could go. In other words, I have two endings, but I am crunched on time because I leave in two days for a ten day cruise. So basically my question is (without giving too much away) how many of you truly hate with a passion "time gaps" or "jumping ahead so many years?" I had to ask because I'm not really sure which ending to use. Both will resolve questions, but they each are just different ways of getting to the answer. So I would greatly appreciate reviews or messages preferably before Friday. That way I can give you all what you want. An end to this story, answers and contentment. Thanks. Hope you have enjoyed this. And I am dreadfully sorry (I know I keep saying that. I'm becoming horribly annoying aren't I) again, for well, my irresponsible behavior and lack of posting in a timely, courteous manner. Thank you so much for sticking around. Enjoy. **

**HeartyJessica.**


	27. Heart

**Disclaimer: For the last time I do not own Stargate Atlantis. **

**AN: This is it. I just uploaded this one. I figure I'll upload both endings. But one for now. The other I'll upload when I get back. So if you don't like this one. There is hope that you'll like the other. But I hope you like this one. **

It was weird seeing them again. She almost felt like she was on exhibit with everyone staring down at her – well, the other her. She could hear them all whispering, waiting for something to happen. So she just stood there, waiting with them. That's when she noticed the locket and remembered what Kara had said about memories unlocking a person's heart.

Her hand hovered above the crystal blue, ready to lace the delicate chain through her fingers. Centimeters above she stopped and withdrew her urge to finally finish this.

* * *

He wanted to help him. Why else would be have brought his work here. He could have stayed in the comfort of his lab where there were swivel chairs with cushions. Point being, he didn't have to be here. Sitting on the hard, cold Atlantean flooring like he was back in kindergarten. With his work sprawled out before him.

However, as much as he hated sitting Indian style – crouched over without his coffee – those inconveniences appeared small in comparison to the problem at hand. John and Elizabeth needed help, and he was going to be there for them. He just had to finish this last calculation before taking his research to Radek so that experimentation could begin. After all, these findings would greatly benefit the expedition. Now, just to …

"You're doing that wrong."

He jumped, throwing his stylus up into the air. "Jeez ... don't you know you're not supposed to sneak up on people like that. You almost gave me a heart attack! And then what! This expedition would be without the only person in all Atlantis that can save them from …their … own …" He rubbed his eyes, sure that they were lying to him. "… stupidity." He raised his forefinger. "What …

"Hello to you too Rodney." She smiled from ear to ear. "Déjà vu?"

"Come to think of it, yes. Didn't we …"

Her smile never ceased. _Yes, this is how we first met. _

"Shouldn't you be … "

_Yes. I died. _

"So are you back?" He looked at her pleadingly. "No, of course not. You interfered. If you were back they wouldn't have just delivered you to us."

_Rodney. _"Sort of." She looked over her shoulder, hearing something that he couldn't. Then she turned her gaze back to the man who had become her uncle. "Go to the infirmary." And then she faded out.

"Okay." He quirked his eyebrows. Nothing was ever normal in their line of work.

* * *

They had been meditating when Teyla felt it. "Ronon?"

"I know." He opened his eyes just as the Athosian did before him and scanned her quarters.

Teyla stood motioning for Ronon to follow. Tilting her head she calmly called, "Gwen?"

_Go to the infirmary._

"Did you – "

"We need to go to the infirmary." Teyla nodded, following Ronon practically on his heels.

* * *

It seemed that everyone was there now. Her family. It was nice seeing them all together. _Okay, it's now or never. _

She appeared in an instant just as the questions started to take paths of their own.

They all stared in shock. Rodney's mouth hung agape. Teyla and Ronon just smiled as if they already knew that this was going to happen. Carson stood in the corner behind the rest – he would never live it down if Rodney saw the tears he had let flood his cheeks. And Elizabeth and John's eyes glistened with unshed tears of joy.

"Hello."

"So …" _Oh Rodney, already trying to get answers. _"Sort of isn't really an answer."

"No it isn't. I assume that by my being here you figured out how the locket works." She smiled at the group in front of her. "Do you want the long version of the short?"

"I think we can all assume what it does Gwen." Elizabeth let a tear run down her cheek. "After all, like you said – "

"– You are here." _Hey Dad. Nice to know nothing's changed since I've been gone. _

_So I take it they want the short version. _"It houses not only my memories, as you would have seen," she pointed to John and Elizabeth, "but my heart."

When they didn't say anything she clarified. "My soul. It's kind of like a calling card. Kara gave it to me to safe guard my return. Just in case."

"So what now? I mean, where do you go from here. Two of you can't exist in one plane. It's not ethical." Gwen stopped Rodney before he went on a rant that not everyone wanted to listen to.

"All I have to do is touch the locket. Then everything goes back to normal. Except," glancing down at her younger counterpart, "our memories and essentially our selves will be combined. When she comes of age she'll remember everything that I am and that she is. We'll be the same person."

"Is it dangerous?" Elizabeth gripped her husband's hand for support.

Gwen shook her head.

"Okay." It was John's turn to say something – even though it was just a simple word. It signaled everyone to say "goodbye" – more or less.

"I love you guys." Teyla and Ronon stepped away first. Then Caron, followed shortly by Rodney. Letting the Sheppards have their moment.

"So, we'll see you on the other side."

The room erupted with laughter.

"Yeah, dad, I guess you will."

"We love you." Elizabeth hugged her daughter almost afraid to let go.

John kissed her forehead, stepping back.

Gwen walked over to her sleeping self, her fingers hovering above her memories. And just as light started to consume her, she heard it.

"Thank you. For coming back. For making this possible."

And this time instead of falling into darkness, she just fell asleep.

_I'd do it all over again in a heart beat. _

The End


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